Oop,
Hello there! How are you?
Umm, I actually recognize you.
You've been in my gaming store before
More than once.
Okay.
Well, um...if it's anything like I remember last time,
my games are too outdated for you
etc. etc., so....
let me show you some new games...
well, relatively new, um...
PS4 right? So I have this that I'm actually going to play next--
No? Oh...you're not looking for PS4. Okay.
Um...that's fine.
So, Xbox One!
Not that either...
Oh, I get it.
I have some Switch games --
Not the Switch either?
What exactly are you looking for?
It seems like you want something...
Vintage?
Okay...
And you want it to be...
Unique.
So something you've never seen before.
I have something. I have something that uh
That I can show you BUT
I'm not sure you're ready for it.
Let me get it out.
Ahh, here it is. Okay.
Now you have to do the demo in-store.
See if, you know, you can take it.
You ready?
It's Pokemon.
But, it's Pokemon that you've never seen it before.
This is the...no no--
--don't touch!
This...
...is the Team Rocket edition.
Carefully take that out....
Never released to the public.
...yet it's an absolutely insane game.
for its time.
It's not surprising you havent heard of it
not many people have.
Are you ready to play?
Alright.
I have a GameBoy right here
I can put it in
Here you go!
Good luck!
Well, well, well.
Look what the Delcatty dragged in!
So
YOU want to join Team Rocket?
Well of course they do.
We had them in our schedule.
9am:Makeup.
10am: Hair.
10:30am: Foot Massages!
11:30 interview the new--
Shut up James, you're ruining my speech!
Well, SORRY.
Yeesh!
Someone's got her Digletts in a knot.
As I was saying --
If you want to be a part of the elite,
you have to learn how to carry yourself with
...style.
Prepare for trouble!
And make it double.
To protect the world from devastation.
To unite all people's within our nation.
To denounce the evils of truth and love!
To extend our reach to the stars above.
Jessie.
James.
Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light!
Surrender now or prepare to fight fight fight!
Uh hum!
Fight, fight, fiiiight!
Meowth!
Get your raggedy tail over here, you're cramping our style!
Style!? Do you idiots have any idea how much it costs
the boss every time you fly in from a giant balloon or drop an R from the sky
for STYLE?
Ummm, Meowth!
Meowth, don't make us look bad in front of this attractive yet dorky looking potential member!
With all the money we spend on fireworks and glitta' alone,
We coulda bought ourselves 500 rare candies!
Or at the very least a night at the spa...
I need all the relaxion I can get from you two bozos!
Bla bla bla, bla bla!
Bla bla!
Uhh, don't listen to a word he says!
He has a...condition!
Condition?
Yeah, it's called being bitter
and ugly! Huehue!
Yeaaaa, Fury Swipes!
Jessie, help!
Ahhh!
You'll have to excuse us for a moment!
Why don't you fill out a few...
....necessary forms?
Your name is...
Butthead?
I love it!
Hahaha! Me too!
You wish.
I don't know why there's not an option for morons...
Don't insult our guest!
I wasn't.
I was insulting you.
Anyway.
Every good trainer MUST have a starter Pokemon!
Sure!
You could go with the BORING options like
Charmander or Squirtle
But, we don't have any!
AHEM.
Or....!
You could choose one of our HAND-picked
*Cough* Yeah, stolen...
PERSONALIZED, Pokemon.
Bring out the first contestant!
Looking for a Pokemon who ups your street cred?
Look no further!
He's sick...no, actually!
He's a little sickly!
But don't let that deter you.
Say hello to...
KOFFING!
This poison gas Pokemon only reaches a total of 2.2 pounds!
So don't worry about lugging around any extra weight like SOME Pokemon!
Hey!
And with it's signature move Smokescreen,
You can flee from a crime scene, or an awkward date, with no problem!
Alright, that's fine.
Looking for something to complement your personality?
Have we got the serpent for you!
Give a warm welcome to...
EKANS!
Weighing in at a hefty 15 pounds, this plump coil will be the envy of all your friends!
Yeah, if you had any..
This snake can grow up to 6 feet long!
Not that size matters.
Wait...
Six feet long?
15 pounds?
How does that make any se--
Jessie, it's time for desperate measures!
Always uninvited, but surprisingly useful,
This psychic type Pokemon will stand its ground even against the fiercest Taurus!
You'll never have to worry about being alone with the voices in your head again!
Introducing...
WOBBUFFET!
O-oh.
Well...
Um...
This is awkward.
I suppose you could always take Meowth off our hands...
Hey!
I ain't nobody's Pokemon!
Or we have a Magikarp!
But that won't evolve into anything useful, so...
Alright then!
Our final offer...
One of the rarest Pokemon you'll EVER hope to meet!
It's small, it's quick, it emits deafening supersonic waves!
Say hello to...
Zu-bat!
Oh, what a wonderful match!
I'm sure you two will make each other VERY happy!
Would you like to give your Zubat a new nickname?
Garflopolis and Butthead...
What a duo!
Oy vey...
And everyone knows any self-respecting member of Team Rocket
wouldn't be caught dead without our trendy, slimming
and always on point *singing* uniforms!
They really showcase my sculpted thighs!
Enough with the thighs!
Let's get you measured and fitted, shall we?
James, go get the uniform.
Ooh, time to put these puppies to work!
Watch me as I walk away, Jessie!
Now stand still...
Just let me measure...
Your neck... mmm!
Girthy!
Now your torso.
Mhmm.
M.
Mhmm.
Okay. Okay.
Alright.
Hold out your arms --
Is one...
..longer than the other? No matter, okay.
Alright.
Almost done...
And...
Great!
JAMES
You know I was just thinking on my walk back here
Why do the new people get the nice stuff?
Jamesy deserves better!
My therapists agree.
Just. Hand. It. Over.
Eee!
Okay, okay.
Oh my!
Mee-wow!
Oh, you look scrumptious.
You almost look as good as me!
That's a low bar...
Now that you're officially a member--
You need to know our three golden rules.
Number one:
Friends come and go, but
money is your honey!
Number two!
Respect is lame
all that matters is FAME.
And most important, number three!
ZAPDOS WHAT, MEWTWO WHO, ALL WE WANT IS PIKACHU!
*SIGHS*
Excellent!
Now as the team leader, I'll start you off on your training!
Ha ha ha ha! As if!
Ha ha ha, good one Jessie, ohhh
A+ comedy!
If anyon'es team leader, it's me!
You couldn't lead a Charmander to its own flame!
Ehh cut it out! Let the rookie decide.
We have a spark! I felt it.
Oh come on, I'm obviously the one they're going to choose.
You know it should be me
I've carried this team through thick and thin!
Aww, come on, pick me!
I am the more beautiful, younger, smarter--
Oop!
You're back!
Ooh, did the battery die?
Um, sorry about that, yeah.
It's a ... touchy system.
The game runs pretty heavy, so...
Kinda drains the battery power.
Anyway
What did you think?
Alright, well..
I can sell it to you, if you're sure.
Batteries come separately, though, so...
Okay, suit yourself.
Go on!
I have other customers, you know, so..
So ... blastin' off again...
ya know?
No? Ok..
Bye now.
Who's that Pokemon?
It's Dragonite's left toe in the...summer solstice...