*Waposh* Top of the the morning to you, my name is Jacksepticeye
And welcome back to Sword with Sauce! If you remember, I played like a little demo of this
Where you got to play this level, you got to play the Mansion
And I went in and I sliced up dudes, and I had all my gadgets and everything
But this is a Steam version of the game, a Steam early access version of the game
Which I didn't even know came out!
Why didn't anybody tell me?! (Because they're Lazy)
I could've been fuckin' playing this- it came out, like two weeks ago!
Or a week ago, I can't- I fuckin' don't know
So I wanna play this! I don't know if I should do the mansion again
'Cause we have three levels; we have City, Harbor and Mansion
Uh, we'll do Harbor
Why the fuck not? Let's get in and play and kill all the dudes
So my mission... is to just kill everyone
That seems simple enough, right?
Oooh!
Dude, I can like fucking parkour and everything now!
...Kinda
Oh yes!!
Oh, I didn't know that was a thing that I could do!
Oh I'm like a real fucking ninja now! Okay, let's get this guy
Kyaa!
Ow!
Ah, he shot though!
That's gotta be bad, that's gonna alert everybody, isn't it?
...Nope! Nobody cares! Right
I have gadgets
Let's use these. What the fu-
Hi?
*Karate noise*
Oh shit! I thought I equipped the sword!
Why? Why can't I equip the sword again?!
*High-pitched* I'm pressing it!
Ah! Shit!
Ooookay
Oh, there we go. Left button to use gadget.
Wha-?
I don't fuckin' know
Oh, left button to use gadget, right button to use weapon
Ahhhh, okay. I get it now.
Right. Darts, it is!
Hya! Shit
Owww! Fuck, my face!
Ah that hurt!
Can I h- Can I have my thing back?
Oh, oh!
I could just take your guns!
Well that's much easier!
*laughing*
Okay, I want my sword back, please
My sword is cooler
Ah they can pick up bodies
I-I think...
*Struggling sounds*
How do I do this?
What do I d- Ah, fuck off then
Can I take back my dart? Come on, it's right there!
More gadgets time- awh, this one was my favourite!
I can't remember what you were called
Does it tell me?
It was the fuckin' Blade-o-matic, or somethin'
I don't know, that was not the name of it
There was a spin-slicer
Or a death-slicer or something- I don't fuckin' know.
Woosh!
Yes! *laughing* Oh my god, look where it got 'em!
Eww! Right through his fucking face!
I mean, if there was ever a place to get him, it was there, but- Woosh!
Yeahh! I fuckin' got him!
'Cause these are the ones that, like, are thrown into dudes
...And kill them
*laughing*
GOO spinning blades of death!
Nice! This is like playing Party Hard again
There's just like a certain number of enemies in the level and I just have to fuck them up
*whispering* fuck yeah
There's 24 dudes left
Oh! They feel all spry, it's awesome!
Climb! Climb up- ah!
Okay- I'm fine, shut up, leave me alone
Ohhhh there's a guy right there
Uhmm
Okay, I got- Ohhhhhh!
That's neato!
I see how that works!
Can I- Can I turn them off?
I want my sword back- *Karate noises*
Woosh! Awoosh!
Nice! Where'd that dude go? He's still there
Shh- stealth!
Stealthy sneaky, shut up!
*Karate noises*
Oh god, that was embarrassing *laughing*
Right, let's use the gun for a second
How do I turn off these fucking goggles?! There we go.
They weren't helping anything. Oh hey!
Hey dudes!
You're all fucking dead now! There's blood everywhere, that's awesome
Heup, heup!
Heeup!
Did none of those get you? Finee!
It's the final countdown, ba da doo doo!!
Da da doo-ahhh, run away!
There's probably a way of doing this much easier but I'm not able to!
Ah they don't suspect a thing.
I am the invisible shadow- I am the silent knight!
That's a Christmas song
*Karate sounds*
*laughing*
Oh, I fucked him up!
Oh I put his blood everywhere
*Karate sounds*
The sword is mightier than the gun!
-But I'll take the gun anyway, because it fires faster
Nice!
Niiice!
Dude, fuckin' awesome!
This is cool!
So I have 10 enemies left. Detection- cautious
Oh, wait
Grappling hook-man, away!
That's my superhero name.
It needs some work
But what's your fucking superhero name?
Captain Amazing? No!
This is the best fucking name! How do I actually get up?
I can- I can suck to it
But then all I do is actually sUCK
Climb!
*Karate noises*
Nice.
Dude, I feel like a ninja!
Like an actual ninja! Not those fake ninjas.
'Kay, how do I use you? Oooh!
Let's see... *Karate noises*
Do you guys see- Is that you seeing me?
I don't know, there's loads of guys still in that boat
*Karate noises*
Ahh shit. Owww
OK! OK!!
I only figured out how to use these!
Ahhh! I only picked this up from the fucking from the shop!
I don't actually know how it works yet!
Haha! I lied!
I always knew how it worked.
I just acted innocent, to FUCK YOU UP!
There's only eight dudes left!
Can we fuck them up?
FUCKING JESUS CHRIST!
Ahh!
I'm fucking blind!
Did I just get flash banged?
Eeeeee Yaap!
Eeee yap!
Owww!
Yooou died!
No! I didn't die! I fucking killed myself.
I was so disappointed in my performance, that I decided to fuck myself up.
Anyway! Lets go again.
Be stealthily
Nobody needs to know you're here
Oh dude it's too late
It's awesome
*laugh*
Dude, this game along really fucking well since I play it
It's so much more fun to do now
I really wish there's a better way climbing things tho
'cause at least for a lot of mistakes to happen
HIYA
*karate*
Shit
Fuck you
*laughing*
Ah this is awesome
Y'know the best part is I was just watching Jackie Chan video
right before this
So this makes me feel like an even bigger badass now
It makes me feel like I'm Jackie Chan
Which who the fuck wouldn't want to be Jackie Chan?!
He's awesome!
Right in your fuckin' knees
Call of Duty time! It's fuckin'- ninja Call of Duty
Call of Ninja!
That's what we call it. Best name!
I love this
Bouncing across the rooftops
Well, I know they're shipping containers, but shut up!
Wabush!
I love how slow the bullets are as well, because you can just see them flying towards them
-From miles away. Ah- you were supposed to keep running
Ahhhh fuck!
Oh, I still have bullets, I thought I only had one
Ah, hya! *laughing*
If the gun won't work, throw the fucking thing at them!
Or the bullets won't work- shut up!
Ah, fu- OUCH!
Ah, I got shot in the chest!
aAHH man down!
Help!
Oh, I though I left the frame.
It was supposed to be a funnier joke about me leaving frame and man down, but...
Shut up. LET'S GO AGAIN!
AHHHHHHHHH!
Ooooooh shotgun!
Who wants to tussle?
Who wants to go? Hello- sir?!
He didn't answer, so I shot him anyway!
That's how I consent!
Fuck you!
Fuck youuu.
I only have one shot left so you're all gonna have to line up and share
Ah fuck!
Ah, shit shit shit shit shit shit!
Haha! Using that stupid sword. I got bullets!
They travel fast
See?
Before you could even blink!
*Deep voice* I am the watchful protector.
The source of all fear in this city
Let's throw these dudes, I fucking love these
Woosh! Go get 'em, spinning death!
*laughing*
And a woosh
And a woosh!
Yes, yes *laughing*
Okay, let's just throw a bunch of em
We have 23, 22, 21!
*laughing*
Ah, I'm out of them!
Could I just have infinite of them?
They're the best ones!
Woosh!
Ah, I missed!
Okay, biggest jump of my life. Wooh.
It's time to gear up, it's time to go
Ahhh!
Fuck yeah dude! Ah, shit!
Ah, my fucking ankle! That was my good ankle, as well. That's the one I go running with!
Ah, that sucks. Ow.
Fuck. Hello!
Shit. Ah!
I'm just a little boy!
Stop it!
Stop, f- motherfuckers! Ouuuch!
Shit, balls! Ah, my good knees!
*Weird child voice* Thank you, sir, very much for your shotgun. It w- It was very much appreciated!
It's time for me to go to work.
*Normal voice* Boing, boing!
Fuckin' Mario has a whole new meaning to it now.
*laughing*
Wooo!
Fuck yeah, bitches! Am I out of ammo? No, I still have two shots so imma throw all my shit around
Oww, suck a dick.
Suck a dick, suck a dick, suck a big ol' fucking dick.
There's only 7 enemies left. We all know where enemies like to hang out; on the boat.
I had to leave the boat earlier. I had to pick up my daughter from Girl Scouts
But now, it's time. Daddy's back in action, he's back to work!
Better than ever- he is, Daddy 2.0
If he could stop breaking his ankles! And he could actually get up on the fucking containers!
*Singing with low voice* X gon' give it to ya. Gon' give it to ya, X gon' give it to ya
Gon' give it to ya, X gon' give it to ya. First we're gonna- rock!
Then we're gonna- roll! Then we're gonna- cock!
*Normal voice* Oh, those weren't the words? I thought those were the words.
Hello?! Hi! Noooo!
He was the last one!
*wapush*
*laughing*
*Wapush* Top of the mornin' to ya laddies!
What da fu- am I running in sewage?
Did I- Oh, I probably just came from the water and my shoes are all slushy.
*Imitating the slushy shoes*
Aaaanyway, who wants to die?
There was a guy up here, I think he wanted to die
I heard it from him, his wife said it.
*Unintelligible*- Come one, I wanna be able to get up!
Woo!
Nice.
Stealthy. Can I stick it to him?
That'd be really cool.
If I could just pull him off the boat
..Sir!
Hello?
Si- He can't hear me, I'm gonna have to get closer.
*Whispering* Excuse me sir?
Is this- Is this the two for one bake sale?
*laughing*
*Normal voice* That's my favourite one.
Wait, what's this? Ohhh!
Flop a body around, I see!
Ah man, I can't keep slicing them when they're dead?
Worst game!
*laughing*
I think we have found out what is stronger than a shotgun!
'Tis my sword!
Also, the penis!
Woooo!
Wassup motherfuckers!!!
Everybody gonna die. Eeeverybody gonna die.
Ah, man- I like that you can play it as a stealthy game, or you can just run in, guns blazing, and fuck shit up.
That is le epic.
Stick 'em up! This is a robbery!
Ahh! This- a- is not how this is supposed to go!
Ah- Fuck you, fuck you. I'll shoot you in the nutsack.
Yeaaaahhhh! Dude, kill streak.
Multi-kill!
Yehaaaaa- lot of dudes!
Are there guys up here? Shhh, I'm gonna use my back goggles
Vyoom, vyoom, vyoom, vyoom, vyoom
This is clear, let's go.
Onwards, man! Out, depart! This is my ship now!
Let's deliver this life-time supply of cookies to the kids.
Where's my crew?
Ohhhhh, right, I killed them all.
Oh yeah. It's hard to find work.
Oh yes, oh yes, oh shiiiit!
That was a lot of them! Okay
Aa- Advance manoeuvres, advance tactics!
Here we go- Ah! Fuck, shit shit shit!
*laughing* Dude.
You guys are getting th- Ah, I missed one!
You guys were getting fuuucked up there for a second!
*Karate noise* Ahhhh, bullets for everybody!
Hello? Take my gun!
No? *laughing* They're like, 'Where the fuck is he?'
I'll tell you where I am! Actually, wrong ones.
Uh, woosh
There we go, woosh
Nice. Thanks.
Did everybody else wanna die? That'd be great.
This is my first time!
You gotta be nice to me!
What?!
I was outta range?!
What are you telling me, game?
What are you- fucking me up for?
Ah, right in the arm- Ahhhh! He had friends!
He has backup!
Where's my backup? 10 4 BUDDY!
There's only 2 enemies left.
One of them is up here
Where are they? Hello?!
Enemies? There's one
I missed!
Got 'em! *laughing*
Okay, last guy is over here, let's go fuckin' do this.
-Awesomely. Woosh!
I-I *Stutters* You didn't see that! Woosh!
Uh oh, uh oh, uh oh. He has a gun, he has a gun! I don't like this!
Put the thing up.
Ohh, he didn't see me because he's a blind bastard!
Okay... put a thing up here..
There we go. Sir?!
I'm over here!
When you wanna kill someone, they just don't wanna die.
Imma put these all around these, though.
It'll happen!
Sooner or later, he'll come back here and be like 'I wonder where he went?'
And then BOOM!
Fuckin' deado surpriso.
No, go that way!
That's a wall! Oh hi, he's coming!
Come on, chase me!
*laughing*
Fucked!
Well that does it for this episode of Sword With Sauce
I don't know why it's called Sword With Sauce.
I-I don't know... It's kinda like Sword, and then it's like, oh asterisk (*) With Sauce.
Just in case you forgot. Oh, maybe it's- it's Sword, instead of blood it's ketchup.
They don't actually bleed and die, there's just ketchup all over the floor
It's PG 13 *laughing*
This game is awesome! I'm gonna do some of the other levels
Um, well we already did the mansion. The mansion's kinda boring because it's flat.
The harbor was fun because you were able to bounce around all these things
It was like a HUGE level.
Um, and then I might actually try them on ninja- Kill everyone without getting detected.
Ohhh!
Survive as long as you can with endless waves. Oh, awesome!
So it's not just easy, normal, and hard
It's normal, ninja and survivor.
I like that, I like that a lot. So I'm gonna do, maybe the city level.
...In another video, but for now.
Thank you guys so much for watching this episode. If you liked it, PUNCH that like button IN THE FACE.
LIKE A BOSS!
And, *low voice* High fives all round. *Wapish* *Wapish*
Thank you guys, and I will see all you dudes, in the next video!
*Audio from previous videos playing over outro music*
Man, I feel like I can just fucking kill anybody right now.
I shouldn't- but I could.