You know, I've mentioned this on a couple different videos that I've done here and there,
but as much as I like to make fun of TV shows or whatever, like really,
it just comes from a place of like deep embarrassment that I was actually like really into some of these shows
when they were on, you know? Glee, Gossip Girl, there was a few out there
that I watched all the way through, and only now looking back do I realize
that that was just like a whole lotta time I wasted.
Now, some of these shows still have some merit, I guess, like in their own ways or whatever.
But there was a show from 2008 to 2013 that I was really into and I have no idea why.
The Secret Life of the American Teenager, like just by its title alone,
it gives you this impression that it's like a real, uncensored look
at what's really going on in our high schools.
You know, kinda like a proto- 13 Reasons Why or whatever, right?
But let me tell you! If there was an award for the 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 realistic depiction of a high school kid,
or just high school in general, this show would win every time.
You (chuckles) you are not ready for this.
So the show starts out with our main character Amy on her first day of high school.
[We saw him!]
[Who?] ["Who?"]
[Mark Molina.]
[The new counselor?]
[The new single, delicious counselor?]
Aw geez, just comin' right out the gate with something like that, huh?
[Oh.] [Oh?]
[That's it?]
[You've got something more exciting than Mark Molina.]
[I had sex.]
Well according the United States sex education curriculum,
uh, you now have AIDS, gonorrhea, the flu, a toothache, and you will die in 7 days.
So good job! Hope it was worth it! Just open the ol' devil's coin purse!
But of course, that's not all. She then tells them the big secret that you've probably already guessed.
[I can't believe you didn't tell us.]
[Telling you now.]
[Yeah, well, why are you telling us now?]
[No.]
That's right. I'm pregna-na-na-na-nnt!
Anyway, it's time to go to class. So Amy decides to walk by Ricky, this guy here,
but I mean, it's not like I'm doing this on purpose or anything! I didn't even know you were there, okay?!
[Oh, hey you.]
[It's Amy, right?]
[I'm just messing with you, kid.]
[You don't think I could ever forget the night we spent together at band camp, do you?]
What?!
(wheezing laughter)
So Ricky's supposed to be like this player guy who gets all the girls.
But like, how?
How does this dude not just get laughed out of the school?
I mean, okay, just imagine this is happening to you for a second.
[You don't think I could ever forget the night we spent together at band camp, do you?]
"How could I forget that night at band camp?"
"Baaaand caaaamp" (slurping)
Like I said earlier, I watched this show when it was on. But this is the first time I've ever watched it since then.
And like, wow, Ricky was just like a total creep!
Like, not even just your typical like douchebag or whatever, but just straight up like,
how did this guy get any girl ever?
Like just watch this scene, okay?
[When are you gonna quit teasing me, Adrian?]
[You're hurtin' me here. Past two nights have almost killed me.]
[Can't take the stop and go, especially the stop.]
Pffff! (laughing)
What 𝘸𝘢𝘴 this show?!
"C'mon Adrian, I'm dyin' over here!"
This was a real show, okay? This pilot got picked up for five seasons.
I mean, follow your dreams, kids!
Then we meet Grace, the goody-two-shoes Christian girl who invites them to her church
for like a little party dance thing after the football game they have coming up.
[Oh I'm sorry, I shouldn't have interrupted. I just-]
[I saw the two of you over here and thought, maybe you're going to the game together,]
[and I wanted to invite you both to the Youth Fellowship Hall at our church]
[for a post-game celebration.]
[There won't be a sermon, I promise.]
[Just music, dancing...]
Well I was thinking of going, but then you said "dancing" like that,
and now suddenly I have like twelve other things to do, so don't ever talk to me again.
Anyway, after this, we're introduced to Ben, who is only slightly less annoying than Ricky.
Now Ben is 15 and that, of course, means he's a man now, I guess.
And he decides to join the band so he can-- you know what, actually let's just let him explain it.
[Just tell me why you want in the band.]
[I've been rejected by the French horn player.]
[A certain Amy... something or other.]
[Therefore, I've decided that I'm in love with her and cannot live without her.]
[I'll find you after I set up the meeting.]
[I'll look forward to it.]
[Oh um, could I have a condom?]
[For what?] [chuckles]
[You're gonna need to know what a condom's for if you're gonna make it at this job, Mark.]
(sigh)
You know, when these videos I do here on this channel, like one thing I find myself saying over and over again
is how these shows are the furthest thing from realistically portraying a high school or whatever, right?
I mean, like we're all aware of that. No secret.
But I mean like, I remember seeing those like after-school PSAs or whatever from like the 70s
and they were way more realistic than this show.
Like seriously, no joke here. What is this show even trying to be?
"Hello Mr. Counselor. I'd like to join the band because I am in love with a swell dame,"
"and I want to make the sex. Please give me a condom because I'm a responsible teenager."
Now don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to harp on the acting itself.
I mean, just like the way this show is written is just- what?
Also can we just appreciate for a second that this counselor looks younger than Ben?
I mean like, the casting in this show is just all over the place.
Now later, Amy's home and just about to tell her parents something important
and we know it's important because you got that single violin just cuttin' right in there.
[Can I talk to the two of you alone?]
[It must be serious. She's sitting down.]
[Why the long face, sweetheart?]
But before she can let it out, Ben calls her up and asks her out to the church party thing.
So anyway, after the big game which I assume they won, we find all our main characters at the church.
And Amy's there, of course, with Ben.
[Sure you don't want anything?]
[No, thank you.]
[Thanks for coming out with me tonight.]
[(chuckles) My dad's quite the driver, huh?]
[You know, I've been training him to keep his eyes off the rear view mirror]
[so we could have a little privacy.]
[This is kinda my first date.]
Ya don't say?!
But lemme tell ya, kids.
If you thought things were awkward now, just you wait.
[Am I making you nervous with all my nervousness? Because... I'm nervous.]
[No, I'm okay. Really.]
[I think so, too.]
[You're okay, Amy Juergens.]
[Even more than okay.]
(wheezing) Guys I'm dyin' over here! Somebody just shoot me!
Now Ben goes off to do, I don't know, something else, whatever, not important.
And Amy's friends come up with a perfect plan to cover up the pregnancy.
[What are you guys doing here?]
[What are we doing here? What do you think we're doing here?]
[We're spying on you!]
[Okay, so are you gonna go out with him again?]
[Yeah, until he finds out I'm pregnant.]
[So here's what we were thinking. Okay,]
[you date Ben. You get Ben to fall in love with you.]
[Then you have sex with him.]
[Then, you tell Ben that you're pregnant. And then you marry Ben.]
[See? Problem solved.]
Code red! Code red! Run for your life, Ben!
They're comin' for ya! Code red!
But then in the end, they all find out who the father really is.
[Um, why- why are you staring at the drummer?]
[The drummer's in the band.]
[Anybody who's in the band can go to band camp.]
[Oh no.]
[Oh.] [No.]
[Amy, not him. Please, no.]
Yeah Amy, come on! You just had to do the old Satan's mambo
with a dude who says "Baaaand caaaamp."
Come on, Amy! Have some self-respect!
So yeah. This show is- is- eh- is really something else.
But mainly the show suffers from the same problems that a lot of these shows do,
which is that they're all made by people in their like 40s and 50s or whatever
trying to grasp a hold of what teens are like now.
You know, as if teens are just these like mysterious, magical creatures.
Like, I don't mean to say that older people are like dumb or whatever. Like, that's not what I'm saying.
But just with this show and like a lot of other shows, to be fair, but this show in particular,
it portrays high school like how a parent who watches only local news
and maybe like chaperoned homecoming once, maybe, would think a high school is like.
I mean, to be fair, I've been out of high school for like 12 years, so I get that me saying this is a little ironic.
But even I can tell you that at the very least, high school is not this.
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Hey everybody, thanks for watching. You know, one thing that I kinda touched on a little bit in the video
and I kinda wanna dig into it a little bit more here,
when I do these videos, like I'm not criticizing the actors, necessarily.
Especially because it's like a pilot episode, and like, you know, the pilot episode's like,
it's always kinda rough and like, there's not a lot of chemistry between the actors yet.
And like, it's all kinda new and fresh and so the acting isn't really like there, necessarily.
And that's one thing, I'm not necessarily talking about the acting itself.
Although I mean, sometimes if it's just like really over-the-top then maybe I will.
But the main thing I try to focus on with these videos is like the writing and the presentation
and like what the characters are doing.
Like, 'cause the thing about like TV shows and movies and stuff and like, you know, I mean,
YouTube is a very concentrated version or example of this.
It's like editing and like audio engineering and these types of things
can really make or break a show. Like, you could have a great actor,
but if the director's not so good, if the writing's not so good, if the editing is really sloppy,
then you know, the best actor can't save a TV show or a movie that's poorly like done in post-production.
Anyway, thanks for watching. Don't forget to subscribe, ring that bell, pull that lever, whatever it is.
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And I'll see you all next time.