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- [Narrator] Hi, Psych2Goers and welcome back
to another video.
Thank you so much for all the love
and support you've given us,
enabling us to venture further
into everyday psychology.
So let's begin.
Awkward silences, clumsy stumbles
and even mistaken names.
Sound familiar?
They're all part of dating,
whether you have anxiety or not.
The true difference comes before and after the hiccup.
Did you spend all day practicing what you would say?
Are you going to come back to this small moment
in time again and again
when you think about dating?
When you're struggling with anxiety,
it can be incredibly frustrating
to have an extra obstacle to navigate
when you're trying to focus on finding love
but you're not alone.
There are countless resources available
both on and offline to help you learn,
find support and cope with anxiety.
Who knows, maybe you'll meet someone
who can relate.
Before we begin,
please remember Psych2Go is not a medical professional
and these videos should not be used
in place of a diagnosis.
With that said, here are eight dating struggles people
with anxiety face.
One, thoughts turn into obsessions so quickly.
Have you ever been so preoccupied with dating
that it feels like you run into couples wherever you look?
It turns out there's a science behind this phenomenon.
Karen McDowell PhD told Healthline
that anxiety stems from the way we think so, she began,
"If you fear that you're unlovable,
that your date will not like you
or that you will do or say something awkward,
your brain will go into overdrive,
trying to confirm its suspicions."
Two, your fears try to end things
before they even begin.
Self-sabotage can sound as subtle
as I can't ask her out.
She's way out of my league.
If you've given up on something
before you've even tried, stop.
The anxious thoughts that make you hesitate
are to protect you from potential region or embarrassment.
But by avoiding dating all together,
you're guarding yourself against opportunities
and connection too.
Three, what are you supposed to say?
Does your mind race through what ifs during introductions?
Do you rehearse your hello for the 100th time
until it sounds just right?
Even though this can be an awkward moment to navigate
for even those who don't struggle with anxiety,
meeting someone new can often be a trigger
for anxious individuals.
They might lose their train of thought all together.
What does a person even say to someone
they've just met.
Four, you can't stay present when you're together.
Do you find yourself ruminating in the past
or worrying about the future?
Time travel might be a cool concept
in science fiction movies
but when you're trying to have a rom com moment,
it just doesn't click.
Connecting with someone requires you to be in the moment
and attentive to the other person
but this can be difficult
when your brain is swirling with input.
If you can relate to this,
don't be too hard on yourself
because there's a reason your mind wants to do it.
Five, spending a night out
means spending a night stressed out.
Leaving home makes a lot of people anxious.
But for some, this can severely impact their social life.
Mayo Clinic defines agoraphobia as a type
of anxiety disorder in which you fear
and avoid places or situations
that might cause you to panic
and make you feel trapped, helpless or embarrassed.
While this fear of stressful situations
might keep you indoors
and isolated, you are not alone.
According to the Anxiety and Depression Association
of America, over 40 million people suffer
from some type of anxiety disorder
in the US alone.
So you're bound to find someone who'd be excited
to spend a night in with you.
Six, anxiety's physical symptoms can ruin a date night.
Fewer things could ruin date night faster
than an anxious thought,
which spirals out of control.
If you experience physical symptoms
of anxiety, such as dizziness, heart palpitations
or sweating, you know just how real the struggle can be.
These symptoms come on fast
and can be extremely debilitating.
Think of something along the lines
of a stomach trouble on a first date.
As embarrassing as it can be in the moment,
remember that everyone has times
when their body and even their mind turns against them.
Seven, you always assume things won't end well.
Are you a glass half empty kind of person?
Has it become only too easy for you
to find the worst case scenario in any situation?
When anxious and intrusive thoughts have been around
for a long time,
they begin to become so habitual that they're automatic.
It's easy to imagine relationships crumbling to pieces
or first dates ending so badly
you'll never show your face again.
But if you're able to give it time
and lots of practice,
imagining second dates and a happy love life
may not be so hard either.
Eight, it's hard to get to know someone
when communication is so scary.
One of the most frustrating things about anxiety
is that it stops you
from pursuing things you want deep down.
Even though what you really want is to connect with them,
you still may seem nervous or even fearful
around the person you're interested in.
In some cases, anxiety can stop you
from expressing your feelings
or communicating with anyone at all,
which makes the frustration grow further.
Do any of these apply to you?
Leave a comment down below about your experiences.
Also, know that you're not alone
in this contradictory struggle
and there's so many understanding people in the world
who want to know you, support you
and maybe even go out with you.
We hope we were able to give you a little insight
into the inner workings of an anxious mind during dating.
If you find this video helpful,
be sure to hit the Like and Subscribe button
and share it with those out there
juggling anxiety in dating.
Thanks for watching
and we'll see you in the next video.