- It's just a straw, sometimes use the straw.
Successful.
Mission accomplished.
(laughter)
(air swooshes)
- Today we are swapping biscuits
that are native to our country.
- Some great biccies are just like assorted ones.
- Biccies?
- Yeah biccies.
- That's so Australian to me the way you just did that.
- We just like to shorten things.
- Biscuits in England are huge deal,
like your cup of tea, you have your biscuits.
- I'm expecting you guys to have B grade versions
of our biscuits.
- Let's check us biscuits out.
- Let's do it.
- Or is it biccies. - Check out this biccies.
- Pick up a penguin.
What on earth is that?
- Do you have some penguins?
- Some Tim Tams.
- I've never had a Tim Tam in my life.
and I know that this is like a thing
that people compare these along.
- What do you call a penguin with no eye?
(intense music)
- What?
Blind.
- A pengun.
(laughter)
- I feel like these are an object of national pride.
- We love our Tim Tams.
- Have you heard of the Tim Tam slam?
- No.
- You do that thing where you bite both ends
and then you can drink your tea or hot chocolate out?
- That's grim.
No, I can't do that.
(cheeky music)
(laughs)
- Oh my god, it works. - Yeah.
And it's so, so, good now.
- See it was a crunchy biscuit
now it's like a really soft biscuit.
What are you doing over there? (laughs)
- You'll probably love it
cause we've dunked it. - Oh my god.
Wow.
- Successful.
Mission accomplished.
(laughter)
- Oh my god, that's amazing.
- Okay. - That's good fun, right?
- Yeah, I'm glad I did that. - Teach.
- On camera. - Great fun.
- Pick up a penguin.
- Okay, so that's the difference.
So these are bigger.
But they're pretty much the same.
- Okay, but bigger doesn't always mean better.
- Yeah. (chuckles)
I guess. - Cheers.
- That's more chocolaty.
It's actually just quite similar though.
- I think I could eat more Tim Tams
than I could penguins.
- You can eat a dangerous amount of Tim Tams.
- They're not the same.
- It works.
- It works
- [Producer] Now bite it.
- Oh.
- Bit of a battle.
Not not milky --
- Oh.
- [Producer] That's how you do it.
- Oh, that's really good.
(laughter)
- I think Tim Tams are better.
- I think I like the Penguin better.
- I prefer the Tim Tam better.
- I think that was always gonna happen.
- Yeah.
- And I can accept you.
- Why was the penguin popular?
- I didn't know.
- This is gonna be so bad.
Because he wasn't ice sky.
(chuckles) - Oh, god.
- I'm embarrassed for penguin. - Come on English.
That's really embarrassed.
- That is a chocolate, hang on.
- Hobnob. - Hobnob.
- It's a Hobnob. - It's a chocolate hobnob.
- Oh, excellent.
- The look similar to digestives
that's why. - Yeah.
I thought it wasn't digestive at first.
- An Anzac Biscuit. - Yeah.
- Now there's a story behind them.
- Anzac Day is a day where you remember the fallen soldiers
from wars. - Oh.
- And everyone would make an Anzac biscuit.
- They're really cheap
and easy to make and they last forever.
- Oh. - So they used to
have them during the war.
- Probably like -- - It's something to do
with the war.
- Long lasting, nuclear winter biscuits.
- Yeah.
- They're great grandma biscuit.
All of the time you have them homemade
from grandma and mom and they're pretty fantastic.
(thud) (thud)
- They're really hard right?
Yeah, you could build a bunker.
- (laughs)
- To eat these in.
- And then eat the bunker as you're in it.
- Not some of the best Anzac biscuits I've ever had.
- Okay. - I've had better.
- Okay, maybe they're better than that.
- They're usually bigger, they're usually almost half
the size of the plate.
They're quite fun.
- It tastes like a hobnob but has a consistency
of a gingersnap.
- Aren't gingersnaps normally like harder?
- This is pretty hard.
(thud) (thud)
Chocolate hobnobs -- - Oh, yeah.
- Yeah, and these are deluxe as well.
The ones with chocolate.
Oh my god, lets do it.
- Who wants a soggy biscuit.
- I do.
- Fair enough.
- I guess you're just a soggy kinda guy.
- I am, that's me.
That's what people say.
- Oh.
- 10 out of 10.
- They're very morrish.
- Yeah, you can get through a whole pack of hobnobs
in one sitting.
- I can find myself having a lot of these.
- Yeah.
- Custard cream.
- That is what I would hope I would get
at the queen's house.
- You note -- - I like the intricate detail.
- Ornate.
- These are a classic I will say that.
- Very English.
- Yeah. - A bit of.
- Looks like a custard or something.
- Dry. - It's alright but it's drier.
- Dry again, you're right.
- I feel like you guys really like dry biscuits.
- It looks better than it tastes.
- Yeah, they're good.
- Yeah that's not (beep).
- A glowing review.
- I think we need more cream.
I think they should make it like cream on the outside.
- Like a double cream. - With biscuit in the middle.
- Cream on the outside.
Wow, that could be interesting.
- Heard it here first.
(air swooshes)
(ting)
- These are a shortbread cream.
- Oh wow, It's like pink inside.
- (mumbles)
- Is it?
Oh my god, I've wrecked it.
- Quite fragile.
- Yeah.
Not good for dipping.
Oh, it's all fallen apart.
- You made a mess.
(chuckles)
- Cause it's shortbread
but with cream,
I get the name now.
- Yours looks better, ours taste better
and at the end of the day what's more important?
- I think that that actually pretty much equals out.
- Australia wins again.
- I think so.
But I do love Custard Creams I really do
and you know what it's about Custard Creams,
they have so cheap.
Such good value for money.
- How much are they?
- You get a pack of like 50 of them
for less than a pound.
These are Bourbons.
- And these are Kingstons.
- Kingstons?
- From the wonderful Arnott's family.
- The Arnott's family who are they?
- They're the main biscuit making company in Australia.
- So Arnott's is the brand that makes this.
- Yeah.
- Oh, I see.
- They make all the best biscuits.
- I personally would not have a Bourbon.
- Okay, they're cool.
- I think they're just a bit malty
and they're quite flat --
- A bit moldy?
- Malty.
- I feel a bit ripped off.
- Yeah. (chuckles)
I think the very first time
I had one of them I was like, this isn't.
You expect it to like a brownie.
- Yeah, I wanted like a moist chocolatey, chocolateness.
- Yeah, none of that.
- I feel sometime biscuits can be dry,
but this is like we've got the right level
of chocolate cream in the middle
so it's nice and smooth.
- It's so dry.
- (laughs)
All right shall we have a Kingston?
- This is really good.
Oh, I didn't expect this to be so good.
- Not bad right?
- Oh yeah.
- Okay. - I can get into that.
- These are really good.
I couldn't say with quite sovereign certainty
that these are better that those.
- Because this is my childhood favorite,
I'm gonna have to go with the Bourbon.
- Oh by far.
(bing) (bing)
- Australia.
(applause)
Well done.
- Oh my goodness me. - Oo, yeah.
- The Tiny Teddys
- They've all got different vocation.
- That's a grumpy one.
- He's not having a good day.
He's probably cause he knows his impending doom.
- This guy looks like he's eating a couple of others.
(chuckles)
- When we were little kids
we used to think it was really funny
to bite their heads off.
(laughs) (maniacal laugh)
- What are those?
Couple of donut biscuits.
- They're party rings but they're mini,
normally they're bigger,.
- Right.
- They look fun. - Or maybe I'm bigger.
Are they normally this (laughs) this small.
- This could be an American cereal.
- There was a massive amount
of nostalgia around party rings.
Whenever they get cracked out at any time
which is very often,
if you ever go to like a party
and someone's got party rings,
everyone gets so excited about it.
I don't know why. - Why?
- Everyone just loved them as kids.
- These are making me really nostalgic
cause they definitely remind me of primary school.
- This is the nostalgic rounds.
- I'm gonna have the big tiny head.
- I'm gonna go for the happy guy with his tongue out.
- You said you were gonna eat the angry one.
- Yeah, he deserves it. (maniacal laugh)
- I'm gonna eat this chill one.
- A British delicacy.
- Is it like an icing sugar vibe sort of thing on the top?
- They're kinda of dusty.
- They are dusty.
Is dusty, a characteristic you admire in a biscuit?
- Well.
- It's just sugar taste.
- Yeah.
- It's fine.
- I think the Teddys have it.
- Yeah, the Teddys 100% .
- I think the Teddys, Australia wins.
(applause)
- This is?
- A Scotch Finger.
- Okay.
Again from this?
- Arnott's.
- This biscuit mafia family.
- I appreciate the shape for dipping.
- Yes, good dipping shape.
- These are Rich Tea.
And they say tea in the name
but they're rubbish for dipping in tea.
Cause sometimes you have a mug
and it won't fit all the way in.
So you gotta like take a bite
and strategically angle it.
- Rich Tea is good.
Very, well you're gonna know what I'm gonna say.
- It's very dry.
- It's pretty dry.
- It's a theme.
- But you can get these with chocolate on the back.
- Oh, well why aren't they here?
- (laughs)
- I love chocolate.
- You can take that up with the producer.
You love chocolate,
I love you back - I love it.
I love chocolate.
- Was that your Australian accent?
- Yeah, it's pretty good. - What was that?
- Isn't it?
- You do not sound Australian.
- (laughs)
- Your not supposed to.
- You can do that, that's a bit aggressive.
- Okay.
- I've got one word for you, yo.
- (laughs) - Eat it.
- It's a biscuit.
- It tastes nice.
I would definitely dip this.
- It's not too sweet, right?
- Look at the state of that. - Look at the state of this.
- Now that's your version of the bunker biscuit.
- Yeah. - That would last.
- A dehydrate biscuit you take into space.
- It's like toast.
Like if a biscuit was toast, it'd be this.
- You can put cheese on it,
you can even put icing on it.
- Cheese? - Yeah.
- Definitely wouldn't do that.
- Put icing. - Yep.
- You can do a lot with this.
This is a good base biscuit.
- What would the texture of that be like
if you dip that in your tea?
- Oh my god.
- Try it.
It'd be like wet cardboard.
- This would have been amazing as the first biscuit ever.
- Yeah.
- But we've gotten way better since that one.
- (laughs) (maniacal laugh)
- I think I prefer the Rich Tea out of these two.
- I think I do too.
- Yeah.
Rich Tea, this is an important win for us.
- I'm definitely on a sugar high
and I've hardly had any. - You are.
- I'm so not used to having sugar.
So the winner is?
- I think Australia won that.
(applause) - For sure.
- Your one's are all dry, like really dry.
There was not a single moist biscuit out there.
- I feel --
- You were meant to be the biscuit
country. - I know.
I don't know,
I've got mixed feelings because I do think
that certain English biscuits are the bomb.com
they're so good.
- Which ones?
Like the chocolate Hobnobs. - Okay.
- Was great.
- The bomb.com.
- British is the winner.
Just because we're famous for our biscuits.
- It's just all a matter of preference.
There's no objective winner here
and at the end of the day
we've eaten lots of biscuits. - That sound like loser talk.
(laughter)
(upbeat music)