Happy new year's.
Happy new year to you.
I hope you had a more pleasant one than I did.
I had little ugly experiences at my new year's,
which I've already told everyone about involving vomit.
Yeah but...
Once or...
Not me, don't get the wrong idea.
No, but it was just a night
where it's hard in New York city,
I think to have like a pleasant new year's,
it can be kind of a challenge.
Were you alone?
Let's not get into that.
(audience laughs)
That is none of your business man.
Was the vomiting because of drinking?
No, someone else, yeah.
I explained earlier in the show.
Someone else vomited?
Don't you watch the show from your dressing room.
I was talking to my wife.
You didn't even, that is no excuse.
I did watch the show and I did see something
that I would like to ask the audience to participate in,
speaking of new year's
that you mentioned during the monologue to show
that I am paying attention.
I heard in the monologue that Conan said
that his resolution would be to no longer
milk the audience for applause.
Yes.
As a performer I understand that,
but as a performer, I also know that he doesn't mean that.
So I would like to request not only to this studio audience
but the future audiences that come here
and to all of America basically as they
and satellite countries as I heard
Mr. Richards was watching on satellite.
Yes, yes.
That at any point not to your knowing
when this point would come, not the best English,
but I'm an actor, I'm not an English teacher.
So that at some point you would just rise
as I would like to ask you to do right now
everyone in the audience rise, please,
and give Conan a standing ovation, go ahead.
(audience cheers)
Let's go and everyone at home,
everyone at home, get up at home, there he is.
Thank you, thank you very much, thank you.
(audience cheers)
Thank you.
(audience clapping)
My god!
(audience clapping)
And please, those of you that will be here on future nights
if I'm not here to advise you of this,
just do it at any time, don't pay attention
to what they tell you here, just do it.
Just do it.
He will respond I'll guarantee you.
You also, if you just do it at home,
if you're watching at home on your set, do it there.
We'd appreciate that too.
Yeah, well that's what I meant.
Thank you.
Yeah.
That really came from their heart too,
that's the nice thing.
Oh when it's so unexpected like that,
(Conan laughs)
it's a very moving thing.
Very nice, very nice.
Well, I do have to ask you,
did you have a nice new year's eve?
I did, we basically sat around,
my little one went to a friend's house
because it's his birthday every new year's
which kind of sucks if you're a little kid,
because you never have your party with your friends,
you have to have it at a different time,
but then you do get two presents, so he was off there.
And then my son Isaac and my wife Kathryn and myself,
we made a little Turkey dinner.
We sat there with our dogs and we sang the ABC song.
What is the ABC song?
Well, my son Isaac said,
"Why don't we just start at the beginning?"
"Make a resolution,"
"we should just start all over again, right?"
And I said, "Sure."
He said, "Well, we should do the ABC song?"
So I would like another group participation thing right now.
(Conan laughs loudly)
Okay, I'd like Andy, if you take that, come on over here.
Andy, if you take this area of the house right here
and Conan if you take this area.
(audience cheering)
So Conan?
Yeah.
All right, here we go, here we go.
Now, let's divide the house, let's divide the house
right here, okay.
So this is number three, you're number two
And you're number one, okay.
Number one.
Okay.
(audience cheers)
Okay, now...
(audience cheering)
Okay now...
I've never tried this other than at the dinner table
and my wife can't sing a note,
so it was completely unsuccessful, but I wish you luck.
We will do the ABC song in a round, okay?
All right. Now you begin,
and here we go and you lead them.
This is the ABC.
Yeah, now don't be nervous.
♪ A, B, C, D, E, F, G ♪
♪ H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P ♪
♪ Q, R, S, T, U, V ♪
♪ W, X, Y and Z ♪
♪ Now I've said my ABCs ♪
♪ Now I know my ABCs ♪
♪ Won't you come and sing with me? ♪
♪ Next time won't you sing with me? ♪
Give it up.
(audience cheering)
Beautiful job!
(audience clapping)
Give this man a standing ovation.
(audience cheering)
Man.
This is what they do on their show, great!
I was afraid to ask, but how old is your son
that wants the ABC song?
Oh, he's 12.
Oh.(laughs)
(audience laughs)
I was nearly afraid, I was was gonna be,
"He's 34 years old."
He just likes it.
Is my bald spot that old, that big? My god!
No, but thank you for that song first of all,
it's gonna be a chart topper now.
Well...
You do that.
(audience cheers)
You have such a nice...
(audience clapping)
You have such a nice relationship with audiences,
do you do that kind of interactive stuff in the shows?
You tour around a lot of your shows.
Sometimes I do, sometimes certain things.
Certainly I'm gonna do the ABC song,
from now on, you just gave it birth, thank you.
(audience cheering)
They all want their cut too by the way.
They'll get it.
I know you tour colleges too.
You do a lot of performances at colleges.
You must get it requested all the time
your speech from the princess bride.
Yeah.
Do you get that all the time?
Well, they usually sit for about an hour and a half,
listen to all the songs I sing,
but their only desires for me to hear the one line
is for them to hear me say the one line
from the princess bride.
(audience cheers)
Why not?
(audience cheering)
Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya.
You kill my father, prepare to die.
(audience cheers)
That's a fun conversation starter.
It's a little depressing when you're at a concert,
you sing your heart out for two hours
and that's all they wanna hear.
(Conan laughs)
And they love it.
Well, I was backstage, I actually talked to you
for quite a long time.
Yeah we had a good talk.
Usually I go into people's dressing room before
and just, you know, "Hi, how are you? Nice to meet you."
You and I got wrapped up in a very long conversation,
I noticed that while you were there,
I noticed you had this giant bag,
what was it?
I had to do an interview on CNN earlier
and there was someone there who actually was the distributor
for Manischewitz Matzo for all of Long Island.
(Conan laughs)
Well, that's heaven to me.
(Conan laughs)
So I requested to be the spokesman for their product.
And lo and behold she calls her father,
the girl who runs the show and says,
"He's on the way to pick me up, can I wait 15 minutes?"
A guy comes up, he's got a whole box of stuff,
gives me chocolate, Conecuh, candy, gives me matzo,
bagel, pretzel matzo and everything
and so he gave me that because I liked matzo.
You have like a year supply back there.
Well, well, I've often as I'm sure
this has happened to you sometimes.
Actually I knew that Glenn Klaws was a friend
and she said once that she had mentioned
something about a certain product,
I'll say, who cares, Fritos and an article.
The next thing she knows
a truckload of Fritos comes to her house.
I have mentioned everything I've ever wanted
(audience laughs)
on every single interview, I've never gotten a thing.
Right.
Backstage I talk about Manischewitz,
they're sending me crate of matzo,
which I'm excited about.
Yeah, that's very nice.
Do you get a lot of...
Do you get Jewish groups often approaching you,
wanting you to be involved?
Is your culture a big part of your act?
It is, it was almost a small,
it actually, it was almost diminished
by even a lot of certain degree early on in my life.
Even greater than the natural diminishment
that most Jewish men go through.
(audience laughs)
What Conan is referring to...
I didn't refer to it.(laughs)
What they do in these shows,
they ask you a few questions,
say, "You got any interesting stories you'd like to tell."
So I mentioned this one story and Conan says,
"Well how do I bring that up? I mean."
I thought I did it very artfully and nicely.
You did it beautifully and what the story is,
it's the fact that I was circumcised twice
and Conan wanted to hear why.
I just thought that we could all help you
with this painful memory.
Actually I have no painful memory about it.
I look at it now as an excuse for anything
that you might read about me for the rest of my life.
(audience laughs)
But what happened was I was born in Mercy Hospital
on the South side of Chicago,
which has since been torn down.
It's a Catholic hospital.
My mother was a good Jewish woman.
She goes there, I'm born,
and the nun comes into the room and says,
"Mrs. Patinkin, we'd just like you to know"
"that your son's circumcision went fine."
My mother has a heart attack and says,
"What are you talking about? What are you talking about?"
"He's Jewish, there's supposed to be a brisk"
"which is the ceremony that they take a carrier."
And what you mean.
(speaks in foreign language)
She runs out of the room,
she comes back a few minutes later with the doctor
and the doctor says to my mother,
"Mrs. Patinkin, I just looked"
"there's enough left for the ceremony."
(audience laughs)
Oh man!(laughs)
Now I'd like to show you.
No!
(audience cheers)
Being late night TV,
you do that sort of thing, don't you?
Yeah, you could do that this late at night,
people just be watching, going, "It's interesting, yeah."
(audience laughs)
"Maybe I'll stick with this"
"rather than the "Informer" show little longer."
Well, it was a real thrill.
That's the end of my interview.
(audience laughs)
Not at all, I'm just, there's a network guy saying,
"Get him off, get him off."
No, actually we're out of time unfortunately,
but I wish you'd come back sometimes 'cause we didn't get
one-tenth the stuff we wanted to talk to,
you're a lot of fun to have on the show.
Oh I'd love to come back.
Will you come back sometime?
I'd love to, thank you.
All right, let me mention that "Chicago Hope",
a really good show, is just moved to Mondays
at 10:00 PM on CBS and people should check it out.
All right, Mandy Patinkin everybody.
(audience cheers)
Thank you very much.
(audience cheers)
He's trying to get more applause.
All right folks, we'll be right back,
you'll see in a second.