big story today in the world of the
Internet Ashley Madison which is a
dating service for married people
looking to have an affair a website that
I definitely only heard about for the
first time this morning a hundred
percent knew nothing about before well
it was hacked today and the hacker has
vowed to leak all 35 million users
identities information I know look at
the color drained from that guy's it's
literally he gets his whole basis with
and his wife look to me sure it's gonna
be a long ride home for you to you can
you imagine there are so many guys
sitting down to breakfast this morning
checking the news on their phone like no
no no no no no no wife's like what do
you have in that nothing absolutely
nothing then they spend the rest of the
day trying to stop their spouses from
seeing the internet like I don't know
what's wrong with the Wi-Fi it looks
like someone's cut the cords and smashed
all of the computers I should be able to
fix in about six to eight months and
then the wife's like or take a year it
doesn't matter and the guys like what
but this is the day you want if you're a
divorce lawyer it's like Christmas
Jeremy it's also Christmas for kids you
want to have two Christmases
I'm not kidding Ashley Madison's actual
slogan is life is short have an affair
their new slogan is life just got much
longer for some now if this is making
you doubt that two people can happily be
together don't worry because there is
hope for love because a couple named
joel berger and ashley king were married
this weekend
true story that's right it was the
Burger King wedding like Burger King the
fast food restaurant sponsored the
wedding right and I know that sounds
gauche but they still managed to pull it
off with dignity
have a look I'm so glad she wore that
garland of flowers around her head
otherwise that might have looked tacky
these two these two must really want to
be with each other because they're
willing to put up with every single
person they meet making Burger King
jokes like they're hearing it for the
first time you know being people like
well now that you're married you're
gonna have to do it her way
they're like you the good ones that I
got what's he working with a whopper or
a whopper jr.
oh I never that one before and then
someone's like oh is it Maghrib for her
pleasure and they're like that's not
even Burger King still funny though bro
yeah
they're gonna have to listen to a lot of
Burger King jokes but don't worry their
honeymoons gonna be nothing but in and
out
yeah
bro that one all on my own
thanks guys I really appreciate that now
lots of people obviously got married
over the weekend but there's one woman
you really can't blame for joining
Ashley Madison right after her wedding
take a look
that's right and today she'll always
have trouble remembering from life