Hello, you've reached the house of unrecognized talent.
Please start after the...
That's it, Patrick!
We gotta become entrepreneurs!
Is that gonna hurt?
Quick Patrick, without thinking.
If you could have anything in the world right now, what would it be?
Uh, more time for thinking.
No, something real, an item. Something you would pay for.
A chocolate bar?
That's a great idea, Pat!
We'll be traveling chocolate bar salesmen.
How many of you have played musical instruments before?
- Do instruments of torture count? - No.
Is mayonnaise an instrument?
No Patrick, mayonnaise is not an instrument.
Horse radish is not an instrument either.
♪ The Krusty Krab Pizza is the pizza ♪
♪ For you and me ♪
♪ The Krusty Krab Pizza is the pizza ♪
♪ And my feet are killing me ♪
Easy. Now you try.
First, get a jar.
Patrick, that's a pickle.
- Yes. - You need a jar.
NO,
No.
- Wow! - Wow!
I've never seen so many mattresses.
- Yeah. - How many do you think there are?
Ten.
Could you not stand so close? You're making me claustrophobic.
What does claustrophobic mean?
- It means he's afraid of Santa Claus. - No, it doesn't!
Ho ho ho! He-he.
It'll cushion the impact of the fall!
Like this?
No, you're other bottom.
Don't you have to be stupid somewhere else?
Not until four.
Is this the Krusty Krab?
No, this is Patrick.
[whistling]
Is this the Krusty Krab?
No, this is Patrick.
[phone ringing]
Is this the Krusty Krab?
No, this is Patrick!
You mean like a weenie? OK.
May I take your order?
May I take your hat sir?
- May I-- - Alright, I've heard enough.
You've got the job.
Once there was an ugly barnacle.
He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.
Kicking? Oh, I wanna do some kicking.
Why, you...
Why, I oughta--
[punching]
[screaming]
Whoever is the owner of the white sedan,
you left your lights on.
Who you callin' Pin Head?
I wanna be Dirty Dan.
What makes you think you can be Dirty Dan?
I'm dirty.
Is mayonnaise an instrument?
You may be an open book, SpongeBob,
but I'm a bit more complicated than that.
The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.
I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready!
♪ It's the best day ever ♪
[music playing]
Is mayonnaise an instrument?
[music playing]
Another day, another migraine.
[snickering]
[music playing]
That smell...
A kind of smelly smell...
A smelly smell that smells...
Smelly.
[music playing]
Squidward, we don't need television.
Not as long as we have our imagination.
[music playing]
Uh, Plankton, sir?
Ay, he's been trying to steal my secret formula for years.
[music playing]