Hi, I'm sue Walker, and I'm going to show you how to make toast from bread
Hey you I have a very important video to show you please watch. This is very important
All here we're going to show you how to cut some kale stems, so let's get started this is gonna
Be kind of easy to do we're gonna just turn it this way and then we're gonna expose our stems
And we're just gonna cut the bottoms off
To remove our stems and that's how you cut kale stems. Thank you for watching stay smooth
How to cut kale stems
really
Really really the internet really needed this video you guys it was very important that they made this video because how else would I know?
how to take a knife
Am I just crazy, or is this the most pointless how-to video on YouTube well here
We're gonna show you how to cut some kale stems, so let's get started
He smiles as if he's actually excited to teach you something new
Boy, this is gonna be kind of easy to do. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, you THINK, and that's how you cut kale stems
Thank you for watching stay smooth
stay
Smooth he has the audacity to say this catchphrase stay
Smooth there ain't nothing smoother than the way you just got in here and got out
Wasting 30 seconds of my life. That's how you could kale stems, Thank you for watching, stay smooth. Thank you for watching
What a slap in the face?
But don't worry you guys there's more it gets worse you guys
I'm gonna show you some of the worst how-to videos on this godforsaken
Website check it out three cheese pizza blend recipe tips for making pizza
Hi, I'm chef Mike Neylan hi Mike Neylan I'm here to show you how to make a three-cheese blend for pizza
first you start with shredded mozzarella
Then a shredded provolone and
then a freshly grated Parmesan
Okay, is he actually gonna show us how to make the pizza because we're kind of running out of time here
How do you make the three cheese pizza blend in such a short amount of time you mix them all together in the bowl?
And then you can use it for your favorite pizza, that's how you make a three-cheese blend for your pizza
It's the same Channel! this this isn't a joke! this is not a parody Channel. I'm telling you. This is legit
TO MIX
THREE
CHEESES TOGETHER THAT ARE ALREADY GRATED
*unending sadness*
*why chef neylan*
That's how you make a three cheese blend for your pizza.
look at the way. He looks he's like yeah, dumbass,
That's how you do it
He looks at the camera like we're dumb like we asked him to teach us how to do this
I knew how to do that! this video is pointless. I know how to mix things in a bowl, dude.
That's how you make a three-cheese blend for your pizza
*someone save him*
They must have used CGI
there's no way one person could make this blend, no way!
I think it's only fair you warn people that this recipe only
works if you're making a pizza I tried this exact same mix with a casserole and my grandma died
whoa whoa whoa dude slow the fuck
Down I'm not gordon ramsay
You insanely technical genius the bar on this video is way, too fucking
High so first things first what the fuck is cheese?
see the internet knows that this video is
Stupid I'm already. I've already had enough, but we're gonna keep going
Let's get back at it with the pizza how to cut a pizza into ten slices
Chop them up into slices but
Hi, my name is chef Mike Nylund hi Mike Milan today
I'm gonna show you how to properly cut a pizza into ten slices the trick is after you make the first initial slice through okay?
It's in two slices now, then you're going to go at a 36 degree angle to make the next cut
Okay now we've got four slices
Thirty-six degrees again, and now we've got six slices
and thirty-six degrees again
Now we've got eight slices that is how you properly cut a pizza into ten slices
There wasn't even ten slices he didn't even get the right number of slices that time
Oh my god
My like that was another really easy thing that they didn't need a video for but he didn't even do it alright
We got how to cut pizza with scissors should I even waste my time with this?
Honestly, I might not even watch this one look. He's got his hedge clippers in his hand today
I'm going to show you how to properly cut a pizza with scissors
Obviously you want to start with a clean pair of scissors
Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa, yes oh please excuse me for assuming I could start cutting my pizza with a dirty pair of scissors
Take your pizza. Be careful not to burn yourself
Don't listen to this with headphones
And there you have it had a kind of pizza with scissors
Okay last video we're gonna watch from this channel how to cut potatoes vertically
I'm sure this is going to be as intelligent and informative as the title suggests listen
We've seen nothing but quality content from these guys so far so I'm sure I am sure
That this video is going to be no exception
I
Think if I hear that intro one more time. I'm gonna die over here
We're gonna show you how to cut some potatoes vertically, so let's get started this time
He's not messing around look at that dead stare look
Look at his look. He is not joking around this time. He's like okay guys
I know the kale stends was easy, but this is some serious
All right John the show me how to cut potatoes vertically my dude
So let's get started my first cut we're gonna cut a base so we can stand this up
Okay, cut it on a base cut abase
And now we can make our cuts vertically
And there you have it tables cut vertically stay smooth
Listen if a large man ever points a knife at you and tells you to stay smooth
Get the hell out of there. Okay, that is enough of that channel
I am not watching any more videos from those people they are psychopaths instead
we are going to go to a classic channel called expert village these guys have been making how-to videos for a
Really really long time now. They have literally thousands of videos and some of them are really bad
how to draw a whale or stingray
with for our whale
Make kind of a rounded rectangle
Like that okay make the bottom lip a lot thinner
This is a whale. I guess and kind of get thinner as you go to the back and then branch off
to a tail like that
Brother this guy stinks make him a little happier whale
nostril
hop in
bottom thin
side fin
There's our cartoon whale and those are two more sea creatures
That's okay, that doesn't make you worthless. It means the project itself failed
but
That's how you draw a whale this does not look like any whale I have ever seen listen any artists out there any aspiring
Artists who are watching this video
Do not let this discourage you this is not how your whales need to look in order for you to be a proper artist this
Channels called expert village this ain't no expert really important. Oh my god. I've seen this guy before
Dupa dupa dupa oh god, that's gonna be bad, so we're gonna go through and play some simple
Grooves and talk about it and then we're gonna analyze them in the next segment
We drop the stick
What what are you doing?
He's adjusting the drum with his drumstick in the middle of his playing and they left this in
This dude, honestly this guy must have been on some drugs when he made these videos
Ok expertvillage you've done enough damage
We got one more
how to open a gate most pointless tutorial ever oh well you just made my job a lot easier
Thank you. Hello. Everybody have you ever wondered?
What is the quickest way through that gate now? Well let me show you
You know it never says on the gate. Whether you should push or pull?
It's designed for a child
I can tell you that best way is always to pull it and I'll show you why why so if you pull it
And
It comes towards you then good. You're in but if you push it
Okay how much time am I really losing certainly
I'm not losing as much time as I'm losing by watching this video if you open a door the wrong way you lose about
One second of time, maybe all right well, it looks like he's gonna
Tell us how to open the gate from the other side as well, so I'm sure this will also be very valuable information
So now I'm on the other side of the gate and now if I push it
Good I get out quickly Brad, but now if I pull it then it closes
But because my body is moving forward so then next thing what happens is I automatically go through the gate Jesus Christ
it's Jason Bourne I
Have saved the precious time, so thank you very much for watching
And hope you will always fool the gates from now on like I pull the girls
Please tell me he didn't make that video just so he could do that stupid joke at the end you're wasting my time with this
Nonsense these are some of the worst videos
I've ever seen in my life want to get more helpful tips subscribe now I
I have never felt so
Patronized in my life if I was eight years old even and someone tried to teach me this stuff
I would want to slap them in the face. You don't even need to be taught this stuff. You can just do it
Why is this on the?
Internet you guys. It's great to be helpful
It's great to teach people how to do things that they might not know how to do but for goodness sakes if you're going to
Spend your time teaching someone how to do something make it something that they can't figure out how to do in two seconds
But in all seriousness you guys this stuff is really funny. It's
Unbelievably stupid, but it's really funny if you like watching me react to stupid stuff
Here's me reacting to some really dumb music videos that say, that's that's a good one. Anyways guys. I hope you enjoyed
I love you guys so much as always. Thank you so much for watching and have a good one
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