Welcome back to my Dark Corner of this Sick World.
‘I admire your deductive process.'
For Godzilla’s 20th anniversary, Toho pulled back a little on the more kid friendly movies they had been making
with Godzilla Vs MechaGodzilla!
‘Does it make your mouth water?’
A ridiculous title but the movie; actually very entertaining.
We open on an evocative scene, as Anguirus, sometime enemy, sometime friend of Godzilla,
sees something weird
and he’s not the only one,
this vision can mean only one thing.
‘A monster will set fire to the city and trample on the people who try to run away’
Just another day in Japan.
The plot thickens as heroic. Masahiko discovers a strange piece of metal in a cave
with the help of his love interest, Ikuko and professor Miyajima,
played by series regular Akihiko Hirata.
‘This metal can only be space titanium’
Space titanium?
‘You mean it’s from space?’
No pulling the wool over your eyes.
At the same time but in a different cave, Masahiko’s brother Keisuke discovers an archaeological site,
'The ancient people of Okinawa painted this mural.'
with the help of his love interest, Saeko.
‘The guardian of the isumi’s, he’s called King Sisa'
and professor Wagura,
'But I think he is very familiar.'
So famous you can’t even mention him on a plane without strangers butting in.
‘Professor Wagura?’
‘I’ve heard of him’
I do think there are too many characters, this is Nanbara,
‘I’m a freelance reporter ut you could call me a scandal hunter – ha ha ha – let me explain’
If you have to explain the joke it probably wasn’t that funny.
‘So, I hope you’ll help me. Ha ha ha’
He consistently amuses himself.
But what of the prophecy? #‘Two monsters will appear to save the people’ this in-flight movie really speaks to me. And
‘Two monsters will appear to save the people’
this in-flight movie really speaks to me.
And sure enough,
leaving devastation in his wake.
I’ll have this cleared up in no time.
‘I could never have guessed that the monster might be Godzilla’
This reflects the fact that by 1974, Godzilla was the good guy,
saving Japan from other monsters not smashing it,
and yet...
and when he meets Anguirus.
‘Something’s wrong. Anguirus shouldn’t attack his friend Godzilla’
I’m guessing they’re not going to be friends after this,
referencing the original King Kong.
Now the truth comes out.
‘Two Godzillas. What does it mean?’
It means that one of these Godzillas is not the real article.
‘I didn’t expect the real Godzilla to appear so soon. The earth people must be astonished’
They actually take all this in their stride.
‘Now I get it. The one that came out of mount Fuji is a cyborg.’
In fairness, Japan has been attacked by about a monster a year since 1954,
so I guess eventually you pick these things up.
‘It is made out of the space metal. You could call it a Mechgodzilla’
Yes, I like that name we’ll go with that.
And the professor’s not done with his wildly accurate guessing.
‘I’m sure Mechgodzilla is being remotely controlled by spacemen’ Evil space men.‘
Evil Space men. 'Damn Godzilla, you’re mistaken if you think your powers are a match for Mechagodzilla’
Now we got a movie, as the original takes on the heavily armed cyborg
and we still haven’t reached the other monster referenced in the archaeology.
‘King Sisar’
The Godzilla-off ends with both out for the count and the story shifts to the humans,
which is usually death for these movies but this one has learnt the lesson of King Kong Escapes,
which it so resembles.
Keisuke becomes James Bond
and Professor Miyajima becomes Doctor Who.
‘Now you still have time to save them’
Don’t shoot my chin!
Heading for Okinawa with the statue that can awaken King Sisa,
Keisuke and Saeko are accosted by an alien agent,
well that was unexpected.
Meanwhile Masahiko and friends are captured and Miyajima is compelled to fix the damaged Mechagodzilla,
‘We use an earthman that knows space technology’
because human scientists are way better than the ones that actually built the thing.
‘Mechagodzilla will srart action at 6 in the morning’
I have to get up at 6?
Actually he doesn’t have to be there as he is put into the sauna of death.
Because the alien leader had a Blofeldian approach to killing his enemies.
‘Goodbye, stupid earthlings’
His guards are equally useless,
people waiting to kill me as usual. #
Even the dubbing which usually lets these films down, here weirdly enhances it.
‘How’s it going?’
‘Ask me later. Let’s go to the castle’
Now the monsters return as Mechagodzilla takes off
and King Sisa is awoken.
‘King S can only be woken up by a direct descendant of the izumi royal family’
with a song.
Winning the Dark corners Bollywood award for, you want a song here? Really?
but king Sisa is worth waiting for, although not much of a fighter.
But as he’s getting his ass handed to him Godzilla returns,
having been restored by lightning.
‘Godzilla is still alive.’
Well spotted.
‘So, Godzilla is still alive’
Anyone else?
and so into the big fight
with Mechagodzilla using all his tricks,
putting Godzilla in serious trouble.
This is where things get a little silly
as Godzilla unleashes his electromagnetism.
Assuming this is because he was struck by lightning but still, some explanation needed.
‘So, he’s transformed himself into a magnetic force’
that should cover it.
Actually, the only word I heard was ‘force’
That’s for Anguirus.
Obviously not for everyone and deeply silly in places,
but this is a Godzilla film that does a good job of balancing that silliness with genuine stakes and action.
‘And that’s all there is to the story he, ha, ha’
Still amusing himself.
'Damn it we will have to postpone our attack on Tokyo.'
'Hey there Hard Corners, introducing Dark Corners new and exclusive range of B-movie t-shirts.
Available at Teepublic, there is a link in the description below.'
Thanks for watching. For more Kaiju reviews click here.
This is the first Godzilla film to credit the actors in the suits, what men and women behind the rubber masks would you like to give a shout-out to?
Let us know in the comments below.