There will be people who say he this child needs to be with a community of people
just like him or this child needs to be with a community of people just like him.
But I would say this child needs the love that you have to give them.
So we received a call from DHS, Hey, can you help this little boy out?
And again, we just had a supernatural piece.
This was the time to say yes.
So we asked, okay, so how long before you drop him off?
Her response was, Now it was like,
Oh, okay, this little bit of time.
So what's more reasonable?
So 2 hours, the emotions are on a high.
We're anxious.
We're trying to figure out exactly what this thing is going to look like.
So the DHS
associate, she shows up at
our door and she has a baby boy in a car seat
and the cover of the car seat is over him.
So we don't know what he looks like, how he sounds, all of these things.
Right.
We just want to know who what this baby boy looks like, what's his personality?
We could tell that the DHS worker, she was flustered, clearly had been a long day.
This was an emergency extraction.
She doesn't stay at our house very long.
She gives us the car seat with him in it and also a diaper bag.
So we're ready to go. We're raring to go.
So I pull back the seat cover and there's this
Caucasian child
sitting in the car seat
after those first two nights after he figured out where, you know,
this was a safe place, he slept ten or 11 hours every single night.
But as
time progressed, my flesh started to flair up a little bit.
What are my parents going to think?
What is my family going to think
when we take them back to the southeast part of the country?
And I was having coffee with a brother
at our church and he has fostered
and adopted four or five transracial kids.
So he has, you know, several black and brown kids.
And I shared my heart that I was struggling with this transracial placement
a little bit.
And he squared me up and he looked me dead in the eye and he said, Charles,
would Jesus turn you away just because you're black?
And I said, Man, I mean, if you're not going
to give me anywhere to run, I mean, this is unfair.
I'm pouring out my heart to you.
But in that moment, the Lord spoke to me
through his words, through his exhortation to me.
From that time on, it didn't matter what anybody else had to think
because it was the Lord's opinion that mattered the most
to my wife and I.
We had the most amazing little boy
in our home, and he came to us through a transracial adoption.
And at the beginning there were a lot of fears of what...
this isn't....
This is not your typical family.
What is this going to look like? What is this going to be like?
When our little son came to us.
There was an instant connection.
But that doesn't mean that everybody who looks at us in the store
or everybody who sees us out in public thinks the same way about that.
Most of my concerns, most of my fears were unfounded.
They were just that fears of the unknown, fears of what I didn't know was to come.
But when I started to look at these kids, how God sees them,
these are his kids first.
And I had to remember that
these kids that came into my home were his kids before they were my kids.
And I had some wisdom that was imparted to me
of how I'm going to be supporting him.
I thought my answer was really great and I said,
You know, I'm going to be behind them all the way.
I want them to know we're there to support.
And this person stopped me and said, They don't need you to be behind them.
They need you to be in front of them, fighting for them, because they're going
to face things that you won't have to face.
And that really opened my eyes to say, yes, this is my child,
this is my son, and I don't see him any differently.
But sometimes the world is going to see him differently.
And I need to have a view of him of how
as a protector of a protector of his soul,
not just physically, but of his soul and of his spirit and of his emotions.
My church plays a significant role.
So when we started this placement, everybody spoke well of us spoke
well of even the transracial component to this piece.
My wife had no struggles with it.
I'm the one who struggled with it, and I had church mothers
say, Child, you just need to get over it. That's ya’lls son!
Yes, ma'am.
I didn't think I needed community until I needed community.
There were several families that came alongside of us,
especially in those early days, who gave us baby
clothes, who gave us pack in plays, who gave us car seats, strollers.
When somebody says, Can I make you dinner?
Yes, that would be a huge help.
Can I bring you diapers?
Yes, that can be a huge help.
Allow your parents to share their views.
Allow your parents to share their concerns.
That's okay.
Allow them to be a part of your journey.
Are there some small minded people at the church?
Have I gotten a couple of looks? Yes.
But again, my assignment is from the Lord is not from people who are around me.
There will be people who say, hey, this child needs to be
with a community of people just like him or
this child needs to be with a community of people just like him.
But I would say this child needs the love that you have to give them.
You would be surprised how one day can change somebody's life,
how one week can change the trajectory of a kid's life.
One word
spoken from a dad.
One word spoken from a man can pierce
through the darkness that a child may be in the midst of.