hey guys ~ welcome back
for this week's video is going to be on
how to regain motivation & snap out of a funk
because I have been in a mini funk for the past two months
andduhh...
yeah I want to share with you guys how I overcame..
how I lost my voice
*chokes*
~ water break ~
okay so I want to share with you guys how I went from feeling very unmotivated..
from feeling like I was running away from a bunch of things
from avoiding a bunch of things
to being okay
and me running away, me avoiding things
took form of me binge watching a bunch of shows
watching a bunch of K-dramas
and I started sleeping at 3am or 4am instead of waking up at 4am
so if you guys are interested in this..
and if you are feeling any way that I felt in the past of what I just described
I don't know what I'm saying
keep watching
so the first thing that I did that I don't usually do..
or I don't usually know how to do is I let nature run its course
don't know why I'm going like this
the way that I would use usually react
if I'm feeling unmotivated, if I'm not feeling the best
if I haven't had a productive week
because I value my self-worth on how productive I am
which is kind of true and I'm sure you guys can relate
if I'm not feeling the best
I'll be like.. Rowena! what's going on ~
you're not feeling good ~ you're feeling unmotivated
you're not doing all these things ~
why not ~ why aren't you doing all of these things
why are you feeling this way ~
how come you're not doing this ~
how come you not doing more ~
~ dddidddidda ~
like the fact that I'm already not feeling okay is already like pretty shitty
but the fact that the voice in my head is like..
throwing an extra 10,000 pounds of burden on me and stress
it's just like
*gasps for air*
let me breathe
so this time around I just took a step back
and just let things happen the way it happens
like if I want to stay up til 2am watching a movie
if I want to stay up til 4am binging a kdrama
I just let myself do it
it's..
okay let me qualify that a little bit
it's not indulging in every single wish that I had
it's more of a little experiment that I wanted to try
because this is something that I've never done before in terms of..
if I'm into clothes more than I'm into personal development..
let me just indulge in that clothes thing
and like see where it goes
because I know myself well enough to know by now that if I let myself do that
I'm gonna get over it sooner or later
if I let myself binge watch shows
I'm gonna get over it sooner or later
this first thing is kind of twofold
it's letting nature run its course
but also knowing yourself well enough to just let things happen the way it's gonna happen
because you know things will turn out okay
which goes back to letting nature run its course
so the second thing is be honest with yourself
if you know you're not okay...
just know you're not okay and that it's okay
like it's.. it's fine for us to not feel good
it's fine for us to be unmotivated
we can't be "on" all the time
we can't be motivated 24/7 365 days a year
as much as I would love that
as much as I know you would like that
the people who are like that..
they're either faking it or they're faking it
because it's impossible
the people who look like they have it together
it's because they've learned to manage it really well
they've learned to manage their stress
they've learned to manage their peaks and their valleys
so peaks when you're like feeling really good
super productive super motivated
your valleys are like when you're kind of low
and you're not doing that well
so they've learned to manage their peaks and valleys
or they've learned how to equalize their peak and valleys
to the point where their constant is just like they're okay
this is a great reminder that it's impossible to be happy
and into self-development and self-improvement all the time
wao ~
and so yes.. be honest with yourself
for me this time around I was like..
hey look ~ you're stuck
Rowena, you're very stuck ~
do something about it or don't complain ~
the voices in my head were just getting out of control
I chose to ride it out for a bit
and then I did something about it after two months
where I couldn't stand myself being a little potato ball any longer
this brings in the whole concept of being present
when I was back home in LA..
a friend texted me
he asked how is it going.. how are you doing
I was like.. man feel kind of bad
I'm home in LA when there's so much work happening in New York
like everyone in the office is super busy
there's so much things changing there's so much going on
and he said..
remember.. wherever you are there you are
what did he say
wherever you are be present
something like that
when I read that text I was just like..
dude ~ yeah I'm home in LA with my family
I worked really hard the previous months
and if I'm home relaxing and taking a step back
and taking a breather then that's fine
I should be present
it's like if I'm being a vegetable and I just want a veg out.. do that
if I want to be super productive and film..
and do a bunch of things and do really awesome work
then like do that
but don't be on one side wishing I was on the other
and don't be on the other side wishing I was on the other
that didn't make sense
so when I'm vegging out I'm always like..
damn, like I should be doing more ~
I should be doing.. ~
I should be so much more productive ~
and when I'm working really hard I'm like..
wow, like I need to relax ~ blah blah blah ~
so this whole thing just it's..
our human brain is so weird and it frustrates me so much
but yes the concept of being present
wherever you are.. be present
if I am vegging out.. then veg out
if I am working hard.. then I work hard
and that's.. it's simple
it's actually really simple
but we just make it really complicated because we are weird
a keystone habit
you guys know what a keystone is
from history or history class
arches are made possible by the keystone at the top
so a keystone habit is a habit that can help you start..
a chain of reactions for a bunch of other habits
for example working out usually goes hand-in-hand with eating healthier
feeling better and waking up earlier
and a bunch of other things
so working out is a keystone habit
because it sets off a chain of reactions
to a bunch of other habits that make your life better
and this is a concept from 'The Power of Habit' by Charles Duhigg
it's such a great book.. it's such a fun read
you got to read it
I'll link it down below
I just got so excited all of a sudden
so know your keystone habits
know what that one thing is
that's another book 'The One Thing'
know what that one thing is..
~ I am like Mario ~
~ trying to make you guys a pizza ~
know what that one thing is
know what that one keystone habit is for you
that can set everything else in motion
for me it's waking up early
it's waking up at 4:30am
so that I can start my day with meditation, with qi gong, with reading
all the most important things I've done in the morning
if I wake up later..
if I wake up even 6 or 7 or even 8
which is what I've been doing some days..
or 9 or even 10...
*frustrating sigh*
because I miss those things
I spend the rest of the day super anxious and super worried that like..
omg I'm not gonna have enough time to do these things
so knowing your keystone habit
knowing that one thing that can propel you to be able to set off a chain of reactions
for the rest of your habits
maybe it's working out
maybe it's eating healthy
maybe it's making your bed
it's something really small
maybe it's brushing your teeth
I don't know
maybe it's..
there's so many good habits that you can have
sleeping early, waking up early
drinking more water because the more water you drink..
the more you need a walk and the more you go to the bathroom
and if you're at work and sitting all day
maybe walking more is gonna make you want to work out more
maybe working out more is gonna make you want to eat healthier more
maybe eating healthier more is gonna help you lose weight
and after you lose weight you start being super into fashion
and then you start this career in fashion and I just..
*giggles at self*
I can go on forever
this is also from 'The Power of Habit'
what is a "small win"
it is exactly as it sounds
it's doing a bunch of little things that may seem seemingless
or may seem like they don't do much
but it's these small wins that accumulate over the long run that turn into the big wins
for example making your bed in the morning
I remember watching a video on Facebook of a Navy SEAL
talking to a graduate class about how you need to make your bed..
because if you make your bed.. that's like discipline
it's the first thing you do every day when you wake up
so that it helps set the rest of your day in order and in motion
and when you come home at night you come home to a ready made bed
and it makes you happy
and I will link the video down below because I'm not doing it justice
small wins ~
accumulating small win
I think I talk about this in almost every single one of my videos
it's important to find balance between the extremes
if you want to be "on" all the time
and if you want to be producing your best work all the time
it's actually a very unrealistic expectation to set for yourself
because you can't be like that all the time
we can't be like this motivated and this happy and this XYZ all the time
I think it's just setting your expectations for yourself
being realistic with what you can and can't do
I have one extreme where it's like..
I'm just working 20.. like 18-19 hours out of the day
doing things that are really important to me
that's like one extreme
I'm like I wake up early.. I do all the things I need to do
I do all the things I want to do
I'm really productive throughout the whole day
and I come home and I edit more videos
and I do all these things and it's great
and I can do that..
I can sustain it for maybe like 2-3 months at max
and then I'll burn out and I'll go into veg mode
like potato Rowena mode
where I just sit on my couch and watch kdramas for months
that is very extreme
and my friends like yeah.. you're like a rocket ship
where you'd like shoot up and you burn out
and you shoot up and you burn out
and that is something that I'm working on
try to find the balance between the extremes
trying to work myself in a way where..
naturally I'm productive, I'm motivated..
I'm doing the things that I want to be doing
but I'm also saying yes to going out or seeing my friends
or saying yes to dinners and to just being social
because the times that I was very intense with work
I would just be a hermit and I would never go out
because work is the most important thing in my life right now
for the most part..
I know the world doesn't owe me anything
I am so grateful to be alive
I'm so grateful for the life that I've been given
I'm so grateful for the circumstances and the people
everything in my life I'm..
like it's a blessing to just exist
but there are times where I feel entitled
or where I feel like the world owes me something
or that the universe owes me something
or that my manager owes me something
or that my workplace owes me something
or that me putting out content.. I don't know
how come I wasn't getting more views or all those other things
when that mentality shift happens
and when I go from being grateful and appreciative
to expecting things..
and to feeling like things and people owe me
it's very apparent..
and my mood and my motivation
and my outlook just changes drastically
I'm generally a really optimistic..
like very realistically optimistic person
and that is..
*clears throat*
*baby cough*
that is even more true when I'm like grateful
and I'm happy and I'm thankful for the things that I have in my life
I remember watching or reading something where Tony Robbins said..
when you're grateful.. you can't be fearful
when you're grateful.. you can't be angry
I'd like to add compassion in it as well it's..
when you're grateful for your circumstances..
you can't be anything else..
because you're just overwhelmed with this feeling of gratitude
and also when you're compassionate..
to the things around you.. the world around you..
the people around you and especially yourself..
you can't feel anything else that's not compassion
if there's one thing that I hope I can leave with you guys it's this..
it's gratitude and compassion are two things that I think are very underrated
when you are overwhelmed with these feelings of gratitude and compassion that..
you overall become a lot more happy as a person
all right so that's it guys
two quick little recaps..
let nature run its course.. be okay with it
be honest with yourself
~ my hair is my face ~
know your keystone habits
know what they are.. do something about it
take active steps towards it if and when you're ready
accumulate small wins because the small wins turn into the big wins..
at the end of the day in the future
and find balance
and the last one is exercise gratitude and compassion
｡◕ ‿ ◕｡
alrighty
let me know in the comments below..
what type of videos you'd like me to make more of
what kind of topic
if you guys have any questions
let me know how you overcome being unmotivated
how do you snap out of a funk
and I would love to hear that and chat with you guys down there
so I'll see you guys in the next video
it is snowing out here in New York
and it's so beautiful
I'm about to go outside
and I'm honestly kind of scared because it's gonna be really cold
actually no..
did you guys know that when it's snowing it's actually not that cold
it's before and after it snows that it gets really cold
👍
fun fact of the day
maybe I'll end all my videos
~ uh butta butta buhh ~
maybe I'll end all my videos with a little fun fact so..
👍👍👍👍👍 *thumbs up dance*
good bye guys ~
see you ~