Let's start things off here in DC where
the Federal Railroad Administration
unveiled details and images of its
plans to modernize and redesign Union
Station by adding a new section but
keeping the main historic hall.
And I just I just have one question,
what in the sterile Jetsons is this really?
I mean, it doesn't look bad,
but it also looks like every
generic airport I've ever been to.
The one thing in your station.
Has going for it is its looks
also they say that about me too.
Not anymore.
Hopefully they find a way to make this new
part consistent with everything else now.
The way it smells,
that's a whole different story.
This place needs a power wash,
some deodorant,
some Febreze for good measure.
Prayers and Sage might help.
Also, some fabuloso.
I mean, I couldn't smell that pic,
so I can't give you credit for fixing that.
But I am thankful that they plan to
preserve the historic train hall just
so you don't preserve those bathrooms.
Kill that with fire,
remove anything associated with
that nastiness, and start fresh.
Fresh being the operative.
Word and yes,
I said
anything associated or anyone.
That means if you use those
old bathrooms you can't use
these. You're not welcome.
We put a picture of your face with a
line through it like you were banned from
the grocery store cause cause because we
all saw what you did to the old ones.
Now what I really need them to focus
on though is the food court. How?
How does one train station have
two chipotles? Y'all wow for that.
How you
gonna maintain sanitary
bathrooms with two chipotles?
You brought that on your? Self
get it together.
Federal Railroad Administration.
I chose this next story because the
streets are talking and I heard them.
Title announced that Beyoncé will
be releasing a new album titled
Renaissance on July 29th. That's right,
blue Ivy's Mama is back July 29th.
This is not a drill. Now I'm not.
By the way, I'm not making any jokes.
That's going to get me on the
wrong side of the beehive.
No, no, no, no. I like it when
my mentions aren't in shambles.
Love, peace. And respect to all
of the Beyoncé fans watching.
Y'all need to start saving your coins,
because whenever Beyoncé released an album,
a tour is never far behind to start
getting your ticket money together now.
So you won't have to make tough
life choices when they go on sale.
I don't want any of you guys looking at
Live Nation like Beyoncé tickets or food.
You know what?
Either way, yellow.
Now we all will collectively wait on that.
Brent fires release date.
We are waiting Brent.
The whole Internet is waiting.
Finally,
I chose this story from Wednesday,
Connecticut because you already know
how I feel about animal stories,
especially animal stories involving
bears doing people things.
A woman named Shannon Davis came
home and found a bear inside
her home and I just saw a shadow
like walk across the the window.
The shadow was from this guy
who made his way through that.
Window and into Shannon's kitchen.
She took out her phone and got this
video of him poking his head out.
It was almost like what's for dinner. Ah,
there's are the best, aren't they?
This bear out here like bro
man from Martin just climbing
through the window stealing food.
I'm surprised here and look at the
camera like nothing just chilling.
Hey I I heard y'all got
some sandwiches out here.
By the way if you watch any
Martin reruns on BET you will
get that last joke there.
They're on literally all the time.
This is a reverse Goldilocks situation.
Apparently this is happening more
and more often in Connecticut.
Since I left so respect to the
Bears for waiting me out.
The Department of Energy and
Environmental Protection says the
bear population has been steadily
growing every year in the state,
but this year they've seen a
20% increase in their calls
for bear issues. You wonder
why the bear population is
growing steadily in the seed,
and then you see that look
he gave you from the tree.
Like, yeah, you know I've been doing now.
This bear was just relaxing
in the kiddie pool. However,
this is how you know you're an apex predator.
He laid there like come make me move
I dare you that bear is having a
staycation and somebody else's backyard
for free and also getting a cover
photo for the bear tender profile.
That is the reason why the
population has exploded.
If reincarnation is real,
I do hope I come back as a bear just
so I can debow somebody's kitchen
and backyard like this that don't
work too well for human beings,
especially if we're black.
Also, I wouldn't have to wear pants
or nothing, just just just out here,
free for all the world to see.
My favorite story.
You know, his bro, man bear.
You know how I feel about bears
from the 5th floor?
Honorable mention to the Union Station
plans because I'm just glad they're
finally doing something to that place.