Tinder isn’t just for sex anymore, but since the app was built with a focus on the physical,
it can be difficult to get a good conversation going.
Having a good back and forth is the real key to Tinder success.
It may start with the physical but if you don’t make it personal before meeting up,
it’s never going to be anything more than just a hookup.
With this in mind, I often tell my female clients to make the first move on tinder.
This may go against the conventional idea that “men make the first move.”
There’s a reason that this doesn’t always work on Tinder.
It’s because most men don’t put a lot of thought into who they swipe right on.
This means that attractive men (ie the ones you want) are getting a LOT of matches and
if you don’t stand out, you just might slip through the cracks.
PLUS many men won’t make the first move on Tinder ESPECIALLY if they find you really
attractive.
Unfortunately the guy who’s right for you won’t always be the guy with a snappy opening
line in his back pocket so it’s better that you take initiative rather than waiting for
him to ask you “how your Wednesday’s going”
That’s why I want you to make the first move.
Once you’ve shown him that you’re interested in actually talking to him, you can get a
more natural back and forth going and this takes the pressure off both of you.
If you can tie your question to something in his profile, you’re going to have the
most luck.
Here’s what your question should accomplish:
First and foremost, you want to get a response.
You want to look interesting and interested in him.
You want to make him feel good.
And, if possible, you want to make him laugh.
This is a lot to get out of one question but it’s easier than you think.
And once you craft a good question a couple of times, it becomes pretty simple.
First off, what shouldn’t you ask?
Don’t start with small talk (no one cares).
small talk is fine for a date but as your opener it’s not going to get much of a response.
So that means no
“What’s up?” “how’s your day?”
“how’s your summer going?”
“How about this weather?”
That’s basically saying “I want to talk to you but I don’t have anything to say.”
If you’re in person it makes sense to talk about generic things to get a conversation
going but this doesn’t work the same on Tinder because it’s so common for people
to not respond right away.
Many of your tinder matches will see that question, not think of an immediate response
and forget all about it.
Next up, don’t just ask questions you want to answer.
It’ll be easy to tell.
You might think saying something like “Have you ever been to Greece?” will be a good
way to tee you up to talk about your last vacation but it will look pretty transparent.
If you want to tell a guy about your trip, then just tell him.
“I had olives, I saw a statue, I went to an island and fought a minotaur”
Don’t ask questions that can be answered with “no”.
If you ask a guy “Have you ever had a near death experience?” he might tell you an
amazing story, but it could also be a dead end.
“No, I’ve always been….
far from death.”
Don’t be serious or intimate right away.
Some people don’t like that and you don’t know much about this guy yet.
So nothing about religion, family or politics.
Don’t make assumptions with your questions.
A question like “What’s your favorite thing about your dad?”
Might seem sweet but what if he didn’t grow up with his dad around?
This can be a lot to get into right away.
Your question should be something revealing but also make him think “Where did she come
up with that?”
You’re making the first move but the right question will make you seem more mysterious
and interesting for having asked.
If you’re looking to learn to talk to guys online, you need to check out Amy North’s
new video presentation.
She’s distilled years of research into a simple, free video full of tips and tricks.
Go to TextChemistry.com now to see it.
That’s textchemistry.com
So how can you make someone feel good with a question?
Make the question something he’s proud of so he gets a chance to show off a little.
You should ask questions that he’ll be eager to answer and where the answers make him look
good.
Instead of asking him about his most embarrassing moment in childhood ask him about a more triumphant
moment.
Keep it casual.
Remember, you don’t want this to feel like a job interview.
“What’s your favorite movie?” isn’t a particularly good question but it’s miles
better than “What is your favorite movie and give me
three reasons why.”
You want to stand out but you still need to talk like a human being.
Confused yet?
That’s okay.
Here are a few examples for you to make it clearer.
Very few of these tick all four boxes on what makes a good opening question on tinder and
that’s okay.
It’s better to keep it simple than risk coming across as awkward or fake.
Some of these questions are sincere, some are thought provoking, and some are more silly.
Make sure to use questions that fit your personality and the guys who you’re going after.
But don’t write off the stupid ones.
Being unique and eye-catching is KEY because Tinder is a numbers game.
If you’re hoping to get the attention of this cute guy then, guess what...so are a
hundred other women.
So without further ado, here are my questions to ask your matches on tinder.
Try these out of the blue or when the conversation has started to lag.
If you were running for office, how could I blackmail you?
What’s the scariest animal you think you could take in one-on-one combat?
Who are the most important people in your life?
What’s something you didn’t find out until too late in life?
What’s your credit card number?
If you found a briefcase with $17000 cash, what would you do?
If you won the lottery, who would you kill first?
What’s the number one thing people get wrong about you?
What’s the compliment you get the most often?
If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?
If the entire world was made up of people exactly like you, how would things be different?
These questions are just a starting point.
I find women have the most success when they tailor them to the guy they’re talking to.
This makes the conversation more genuine because it makes the guy feel seen but if you’re
in a pinch, these are all good questions to make things more interesting.
Check out the description below for a link to all these questions and more!
You can just copy and paste them right into Tinder and get the conversation going.
Tinder and texting have a lot in common.
And no one knows that better than Amy North.
Go to TextChemistry.com right now to get the inside scoop on her brand new program.
She’s been teaching women like you how to communicate with men online for years.
TextChemistry.com
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