- Growing up, I didn't necessarily feel
like I was part of the womanhood
and now I do more because I realize being a woman
is not as nearly construed as I thought it was
when I was a young adult.
And me being a woman is empowering
and I think that there's compassion, and caring,
and empathy that goes with it.
And I believe that the role of women
within the intersex movement is particularly empowering
because we are so aware
that others will constantly try to control us.
And intersex and the medicalized treatment of intersex
is really one of control.
Hi, I'm Betsy Driver and I am the mayor
of Flemington Borough in Hunterdon County, New Jersey.
One Nation under God,
indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
- Hold, please. - Yep.
- Mayor Driver? - Here.
- Mr. Doshna? - Here.
- Ms. Giles-McCormick? - Here.
- I was born in Buffalo, New York in the mid-1960s
and when I was born, my doctors weren't quite sure
if I was a boy or girl based upon
what my genitals look like.
Intersex, very simply, is being born
with a congenital difference in sex characteristics
that differs from standard male or female.
There is often an urge early on in that child's life
to surgically shape their body into the gender
that the medical community believes
that child will grow up to fit into.
Many of these surgeries, I did not discover
they actually happened to me until I was in my mid-30s.
As a child growing up, outside
of the medicalization of my body,
I was like any other kid.
I was a bit of a tomboy.
I like to play sports.
I was born with something called
congenital adrenal hyperplasia
and that's a life-threatening disease.
I can die.
If I don't take the medicine every day, I can die.
There was never a connection made,
however, between this disease that I have
and what was going on with my body.
But in late 1990s, I bought my first computer.
I went out and I Googled congenital adrenal hyperplasia.
It's the very, very first thing I did
when I got this thing hooked up to the dial-up internet,
(imitating modem wailing) that little funny noise
the modems used to make.
And I discovered I wasn't the only one
and it was life changing.
It was, I realized that
just how much my childhood had been a lie.
And that's what prompted me to get my medical records
and that's when I discovered what happened
at eight months old.
I was in my mid-30s before I discovered the surgeries
that were done on my body as a child.
It was anger.
There was sadness.
There was jealousy as to maybe what it would have been like
to not have had these things done to my body,
to not have a body that has been so medicalized,
which I still think was medicalized sexual abuse.
And I was sad for my mother too
because she had been lied to at that point
by being told there was nobody else out there.
Taking that and realizing and reading
through some of those other records,
and realizing that they were real efforts made
to keep us isolated from other kids
with intersex variations, as well.
I decided with somebody else who I met
through one of these groups for women with CAH
that we started Bodies Like Ours.
So, Bodies Like Ours was an internet-based community
for people throughout the world to meet each other
and talk about what it was like to be born
with an intersex variation.
It really gave birth to the intersex movement.
Even now, I'll get some contact from people
who say, "Oh, I was on Bodies Like Ours in 2003 or 2004,
and you saved my life."
Or I'll hear intersex advocates giving a speech
and they'll reference it.
And then I kind of dropped out
of the whole intersex advocacy for a while.
I got married, I got focused on my career,
my wife and I had two children that we were raising,
and then I got breast cancer.
Then there was some theory
that some of the breast cancer,
the variety of breast cancer that I had
was due to the hormones that were given to me as a child
to try and feminize my body.
And then I got past the cancer.
I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer,
unrelated to the breast cancer.
And again, questions as to whether or not
this ovarian cancer was due
to some of the hormones given to me as a child.
These two things kind of encouraged me
to start looking what's happening
in the intersex movement again.
It reopened, it reawakened
that intersex activist in me.
I found myself as an unemployed journalist.
Started coming to council meetings.
I decided that I would run.
I wasn't happy with what I saw and I would run for council.
And against all advice given to me from political advisers,
I wrote my story about Intersex Awareness Day
and my history as an intersex advocate,
and I used it as a campaign piece.
The response was just amazing from people,
people who probably would not have voted for me,
voted for me because they saw courage,
and they saw somebody who could make something happen.
I ended up becoming the first openly intersex person
elected to public office in the United States
and only the second in the world,
right behind my friend Tony Briffa in Melbourne, Australia.
Well after a few months on council,
I decided the mayor seat was up for election,
and I decided I was going to run for mayor.
Next up is Resolution 2019-117,
proclaiming the month of June
as Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning,
and Intersex Pride Month in the borough of Flemington.
We did this last year for the first time ever
and if we could have a motion
to move that. - So move.
- Second? - Second.
- And with it on the floor, I just wanna point out
that this is just really important that we make sure
that all members of our community
are welcome in our community
and made to feel part of our community.
Obviously, those of you who know my own history,
this is important to me as well,
and I do appreciate council's consideration on that.
- Happy World Pride, people!
Say hello to your community heroes!
- So today, I left my mayor phone at home
because I'm just strictly gay, not mayor-ing today.
New York City Pride has always been very inclusive.
I spoke at a pride rally in 2004 or five,
I forget the exact year.
I spoke last year at their pride rally.
This year, I'll be on their lead float
in the community heroes float leading off the parade,
and I'm incredibly proud of that
that they are recognizing intersex,
as well as my accomplishments as a person
with an intersex variation elected to public office.
My mother before she died did tell me,
so my mother died of cancer,
(sighs) and
did tell me how proud she was
of me doing this work.
And so, as I'm up there on that float,
I think really it's probably gonna be, oh man
if my mom could see me now.
The value of the sisterhood
and knowing that other women have your back
and that we have each other's backs is really good.
It's really empowering.
Be yourself.
Tell your own story.
Be proud of your story.
Embrace who you are.
Just be yourself.