Alright, so you want your ex to break up with their rebound. I get it. You know,
probably a lot of people who want to save their relationship with their partner would like their
ex to end a rebound relationship if their ex isn't a rebound relationship. But how do you
actually go about making this happen? How do you convince them to do this? Because obviously
you can't just sit down with them and say, Hey, you should break up with your rebound. They're a
terrible person and you should get back together with me. Maybe that's gonna work like, you know,
one out of a thousand times or something. But , hey, if that was gonna work,
you probably wouldn't be here watching this video. So what does it actually take? That's what we're
gonna be getting into in this video. So please watch through to the end because at the end of
this video, I'm going to be giving you actual strategies to save your relationship and to
get back on track with getting back together once the rebound is actually over and out of the way.
Hey, there, it's clay with modern love dot light. If your ex is in a rebound relationship,
I know this is incredibly painful to watch and observe, especially if you are, um, still in love
with them. And if you want to explore what the two of you might be able to achieve together in a
romantic sense, it can feel as if you know they're pulling back and as if you're, you're, you're just
kinda losing that window of opportunity. But here's the thing, you absolutely can get
back together with your partner after a rebound relationship. And even if they are in a rebound
relationship right now, I mean, we've helped so many people over the years whose partners have
gone on to rebound and we've managed to help them to work through this process. And so I'm gonna be
telling you what it takes to actually help your partner break up with their rebound, even if
it doesn't seem like they want to right now. Now, in order for you to really understand how
this all works, you have to really get that this isn't just happening in isolation, okay? So there
are certain things that need to happen, uh, before we can get to this point. Um, it's not like you
can just call them up on the phone and say some magic combination of words that's going to make
them, uh, break up with the rebound right here and now without certain other things in place first.
So we wanna make sure that these other things are in place. You may have watched another video
already where we went over some of these things, but just to recap that, um, you know, we want to
reduce the romantic pressure. We wanna focus in on building the emotional connection and we want
to demonstrate that we are not the same person they believe that, that they broke up with.
But with all of that in place, there is going to come a time where your ex feels and senses
and knows that they are going to have to make a hard choice. Ending a rebound relationship,
even if it's not working for you, is never an easy thing. You know, nobody wants to
voluntarily go out of their way and say, Hey, I think we need to talk. It's not working,
let's break up. Nobody wants to do that. Things have to be at a pretty bad place for someone to
take that step into that level of discomfort to actually end a relationship. Your ex may put off
making this choice. They may put off ending the rebound relationship, and that's understandable,
I think because again, nobody wants to have that conversation. Nobody wants to make someone else
cry, nobody else wants to go through that. They're probably going to put this off.
They're going to try to downplay and rationalize away feelings that they're developing for you if
you've been developing that emotional connection. And of course, if you're familiar with our five
stages of getting back together again, you can check that out up here in a video card if that's
something that you are not familiar with. Those five stages kind of sum up where your ex's journey
is at. But if you're, they're at this point, they are probably at what we would call the
crisis point. They very realistically acknowledge the fact that they have a connection with you,
but that connection is putting them in an uncomfortable place where they're
having to confront some hard choices like ending the rebound relationship. Obviously,
they obviously don't want to risk ending the rebound relationship and then trying to get
back together with you. But then what happens if you reject them or you say, Hey, you wanted
to get back together with me, I was just being friendly, or, or something like that, right?
They don't wanna end something with a rebound and then fall flat on their face with you and
then just look silly, look like the hot mess. You know, tell people that you're dating again and
just have it blow up. For some reason they don't want to do that. They're probably going to feel
very uncomfortable at this point. They're probably going to be be very resistant to change. They're
probably gonna be very resistant to the idea of breaking up with the rebound. However you can
help them through this, okay? There are a couple different ways that you can do this depending on,
you know, what they're, what they're thinking, where the two of you are at the, the specifics of
the scenario, et cetera. But if they connecting really well with you because they're at the
crisis point, you can actually reassure them that, hey, you do want this relationship.
Now, again, don't get me wrong, there are definitely a lot of circumstances where
it doesn't make sense to tell your ex point blank how you feel and that you love them, that you have
affection for them, et cetera. Um, I think most of us know this because most of us, myself included,
have made a lot of mistakes when we've tried to go through the past of getting back together with our
exes. However, if your ex is truly at the crisis point, then they have the capacity to take in this
information. They have the capacity to take in these feelings. In fact, they probably also want
to know that you love them, that you care about them, that you want to be together with them. You
can say these things if they're at the crisis point. Why? Because these things are going to
help them over that hump to know that if they do end the rebound relationship, they're not going to
fall flat in their face and be rejected by you. They're gonna know that they have a, a safe place
to land, that they're gonna be able to be accepted by you and that their affections are going to
be met well and received well and perhaps even reciprocated by you. Again, don't get me wrong,
I think it is important to take it slow when you are reconciling with a partner who's coming out
of a rebound, but it is also nice for them to know that they have a soft place to land as well too.
Another thing that's also important as well too is, is, is if they are, um, maybe a little bit
more, um, stubborn may, maybe they're not quite as direct about how they feel about you, you may have
to give them some positive pressure, some positive incentive, I guess we could say to make a decision
here. And this is not quite an ultimatum. You might think that I'm about to, what
I'm about to say is an ultimatum, but it's not because it's a little bit different. So what I'm
gonna encourage you to do if you need to at this point, if they're very stubborn about not ending
the rebound relationship, is to put some positive pressure on by letting them know something like,
you know, Hey, I get it. It's hard to, to end a relationship. It's hard to, to get out of a
rebound, especially when you feel like you're in over your head already. However, here's the
thing, um, I've really enjoyed connecting with you. I've really enjoyed spending time with you,
and honestly, I'm in a place where I'm looking for trying to, uh, get into a relationship myself
too. And if I had my choice of it, I'd, I'd, I'd like to explore what's possible with you.
But it sounds like you're not ready for that, and that's totally okay. But here's the thing, if,
if that's truly where you're at, that's all right. I get it 100%. But the thing is, I might have to
start dating some other people, and maybe that's not gonna, you know, mean anything significant for
us right away. But if, if I do start to develop feelings for someone or if they develop feelings
for me, you know, it might not be possible for us to spend time together anymore. I might end up in
a relationship with someone else and they might not want me to talk to you. Is that something
that you're okay with? This is something that might cause them to, to check in and they might
have to say no, that's not something okay with, in which case, okay, great. You've, you've been able
to leverage the emotional connection that you have with them to start to get them to make a choice.
Oh, okay, well really, like, does that mean that you think it might be time to end that rebound
relationship? And now you can start talking about that and you can start encouraging them on that.
Or if they say, well, yeah, it's okay. I mean, I guess maybe we're just not meant to be together,
then you can just again, check in with them. Okay? So what I'm hearing you say is that, um, it's okay
for me to date someone else and you're okay to, to risk the fact that we might lose touch if I
meet someone and I fall in love with that person. Is that, is that really what you're saying? Is
that really okay with you? So you're checking in again and then after that, if they really persist
and say, yeah, that's what I'm saying, you can say, okay, fine, thank you for letting me know.
At this point. They might, they just might need to experience the consequence of their indecision.
They just might need to experience what it's like to not have you in their life anymore. It
might feel like you're giving up at this point, but really you're not because you have already
taken an emotional connection that you have with them and you start to leverage it by, uh, letting
them know that there are consequences to their indecision. And as you leverage this connection,
they're going to feel its loss. If they persist in not wanting to be together with you, they might
just have to feel for a few days or maybe a few weeks or whatever, um, what it's like to not have
this great intense emotional connection with you. So even though it feels like you're giving up,
they're just getting to experience what it's actually like to not have you in their life.
And when they do start to experience this, it might be a real wake up call for them
and they start to say, oh, wow, I gotta get my butt up and to actually make a decision here,
otherwise I'm gonna lose the opportunity to connect with this amazing person here and to have
this amazing person in my life. This is all taking place within the context of a strong emotional
connection. So like, if the two of you aren't at a place where we have a strong emotional connection,
please do not do this right now. Please don't. It's not gonna go well. And second of all,
this is different from, uh, an ultimatum in a few different ways. Um, first of all,
we are making ourselves responsible for how we're feeling. We're saying, Hey,
what I want is to be in a committed relationship. We're not saying you need to make a choice.
It's either we're getting back together and you're breaking up with that person
or nothing. We're, we're, we're, we're being very compassionate here. We're being very empathetic
with where they're at and also we're giving them responsibility over the situation. They're not
able to point to us and say, we're not talking because you're some jerk that made me make a hard
choice or something. We're like, yeah, okay, we're not talking because I couldn't make the choice.
And of course he wanted to be with someone else. They have to take ownership of it. And this is
important because it lets them weigh that choice. It lets them say, wow, like, what am I really
doing here? Maybe I really should end this rebound relationship. And it also empowers them because
they do feel responsible for it. It empowers them to change the situation if they don't like it.
That's something that you can do if you really need to help encourage your ex to end their
rebound relationship. Now, of course, once the rebound relationship is over,
it's not smooth sailing, not by a long shot, but you of course should take a victory lap up. Next,
I'd like you to watch this video right over here where we talk about how to get back together with
your ex once the rebound is out of the picture. Of course, we're also gonna talk about what you
can do to set yourself up for success once the two of you are back together. But of course,
it all starts over here. So check out this video next and I'll see you over there.