[Love Will Have Its Sacrifices opening theme]
Hey Betty. So I’ve detected a theme amongst the talismans.
It’s “Items loaded with personal baggage likely to get you killed obtaining them.”
I’d have preferred “Potent Potables”, but…
I can hardly wait to figure out what the fourth one is.
Mattie’s locket?
But wasn’t that her own super-secret lifeextending thing-a-majig?
No the spell that made Mattie unkillable was on the piece of her heart inside.
The locket was something else.
I think she acquired it after mother maneuverered her onto the Board.
Or I guess whatever the Board was a thousand years before there was a University.
Will it still work if it’s all busted up?
I’m not sure that matters if we don’t know where it is.
And you haven’t seen it since?
No, I took it off and next day it was gone.
I mean maybe Red Sonja knew it was a talisman when she came over to steal the Book.
Or maybe the library shuffled it off somewhere.
[Library growls]
Hey! I’m not the one smacking people with books and writing messages in blood buddy!
Oook, maybe let’s not antagonise the sentient building.
Athough if it did stash it away for safe-keeping
now would be a really great time to give it back.
No?
Sorry, by the way.
I know it’s all you had left of her.
I know that’s my fault too.
It was a lot of people’s faults.
Lawrence. Yours. Mine. Mattie’s.
I mean, she’d have been the first to tell you,
she would have killed everyone on campus that got in her way.
You still miss her though.
Yeah.
Well.
Love is like that.
Maybe we’re coming at this from the wrong way.
What do you mean?
Well, Mattie.
She’d never bother with all this scrambling around to find talismans.
Well, the talismans were how the Board controlled the Dean.
Yeah but before the Board there were the people that made them.
The ones who stopped the Dean in the first place.
Yeah but we’re not talking about people, we’re talking about gods.
Gods who put an awful lot of effort into keeping the Dean from opening the Gate.
What do you bet they’re not thrilled about what she’s up to now?
But before we had a chance to really get our blasphemy on, we were saved by the bell.
If by bell you mean mind-splitting feedback because J.P needed the floor.
[Mind-splitting feedback]
So sorry to interrupt but I fear I have to risk.
[The Dean] Explain to me why I shouldn’t let my darling, deadly girl peel you like a grape?
[Theo] Why am I taking all the heat for losing the sword?
[Danny] Because you were the one being a corporate creep when Team Fangless stole it.
I say I try the Zeta toss, see if I can hit the middle of the Fifth Seal from 100 feet up
Fifth seal?
Have they already unearthed it?
I’m afraid so.
Time is shorter than we think.
[The Dean] That’s enough!
[Danny] You never let me do anything!
Don’t kill the weasel who stabbed you!
Don’t tear the head off your precious Carmilla.
[The Dean] Don’t forget yourself, girl.
I raised you from the dust when no one cared about you.
Not your school. Not your so-called friends.
The used you up, and spit you out.
Did sweet little Laura even shed a tear
before giving up your school for her precious Carmilla?
Besides, their time is coming.
I may not be able to breach the Library quite yet, but after the fifth seal is open...
Well.
Keep an eye on things, I have to prepare for the ritual.
And put the boy down, he’s of no use without a windpipe.
Ritual? Is that how they’re opening the seals?
Yes.
I’m starting to suspect some kind of sacrifice is involved.
[Theo gulping in air]
[Kirsch] Uh. D-Bear. I cared. That you were dead.
And I’m not just saying that so you’ll stop chowing down on me like I’m a Kirsch-Slurpee.
I could see how much you wanted everybody to be like- safe.
And Laura totally cried- you were like her hero- you were everybody’s.
[Danny making angry , chompy noises]
[Kirsch] Ouch ouch ouch ouch ow ow.
So thanks to J.P we not only have terrifying insight into how badly the Dean has messed up Danny,
but also the totally-not-bonechilling revelation that
she’ll be opening the fifth seal ASAP and coming for us next.
Which means it’s time to start looking outside of the box.
Still up to summoning a bloodthirsty Pagan god?
We’ve got three candidates: Enki, the God of Knowledge;
Hastur, the Shepherd of Men; and Ereshkigal, the Queen of the Underworld.
I’m thinking she’s our best bet.
She’s like the Dean’s Sister. Or Reflection. Or both.
The locket is hers- what with the book belonging to Enki and the sword to Hastur.
And it’s her turf that the Dean is looking to take over.
OK, well.
Why stop at a bloodthirsty Pagan god when you can go full-on Death Goddess?
I’m thinking the reason that we’re always in over our heads
is that we keep picking fights that are over our heads.
If the Dean has some supernatural nemesis who might wanna help, why not give that a try?
Well would you look at that: Laura Hollis, Chessmaster.
Look at us.
Making plans. Strategizing.
Comrades working shoulder-to-shoulder.
With no desperate kissing or lusty sexual undertones.
No awkwardness. Just good, old-fashioned platonic buddys.
[Desperate kissing and lusty sexual undertones]
Uh. Yeah. So.
Oops.