Hi everyone, it's Finola, again and this is my last of my
pre-recorded stuff, because I deliberately actually kept my
outfit the same so that you'd know it was pre-recorded. I've
done it in one sitting because I wanted to show you that, yes,
it's pre-recorded. Yes, I'm switching off for my holidays,
because I believe that it's really important. So this is my
last for my pre-recorded ones for you. And this question is
fantastic. Okay, so this one is episode 47 for you and it's:
What's your advice on making difficult business decisions
when it comes to relationships? Great, great question. Okay. And
so the detail of it is, do you say no to a project, letting go
with a client that you don't enjoy working with anymore, or
cutting ties with another provider who didn't deliver on
their promise? Okay. So how do you manage that? Great, great
question. Okay. And one, every entrepreneur has experienced,
anybody in business had experienced this. So these are
my thoughts so far. And again, I have the caveat of, as time goes
on, I learn more, get a little wiser. And I'll have a better
answer the next time, but this is my answer for today. Okay.
So the first thing that I would say to you is, know that
everything in your business is ultimately your choice. Okay?
That's really important. We choose how we react, we choose
how we work, we choose how we interact, we choose how we deal
with different situations. So it's ultimately your choice how
you do this, okay? And that you're never without the ability
to respond in a way that fits who you are. Okay. So some
thoughts for you. Okay. Boundaries are really important
here. Okay. So the first thing I have is, again, like last week,
start with clarity around what you want to achieve in this
business. Okay. So be really clear, it's the question of:
What are you here for? What are you trying to achieve? What is
it that you're here to set out to do? Okay, and then that's
that question which we talked about last week, which is, what
are you willing to do to make that happen? That is about
clarity, because when we have clarity, we have better - we
have the opportunity to have better relationships. Because
when we're clear about what we want for ourselves and what we
want for our lives, what we want for our business, then we're
clear about how we want to do business. Okay.
So the next thing that I would say to you is, and it is this,
how we want to do business, right? So this piece I would say
to you is: create your own rules for how you will work. Okay. And
even - I do this before I deliver any live sessions, I
have rules of engagement, what's expected of everybody in the
room, and it's an acceptance. It's a non judgmental space and
I'm very, very clear, and I reiterate them every time. But
this applies throughout your whole business. So being -
creating rules for how you do business, and I do this, we this
is actually part of the Get Strategic programme. And for
those of you who have started it, it's episode - it's step
3.6. Does it fit your why? And that's because everything that
we do is about alignment, aligning your purpose with your
reality, aligning your purpose with what you do from a
marketing context, what you do from everything you decide.
Making sure it's fully in alignment. So how you do
business, is making sure you're in alignment with your how, with
your 'why'. Sorry, your 'how' must be in alignment with your
'why'. Okay. So for example, I had this situation last week
with a client and we were working together on something
and it was the piece of advice that I gave them is, create your
own rules. If you don't want to work and deliver a product or a
service like this, without supplying X, Y and Z along with
it, then don't do it. If you have clients who don't want to
buy your full package and you feel it's really critical for
them to buy the full package, well then consider whether
you're willing to walk away from the project, because you know
it's not the best that you can deliver on. These are the
decisions that you have to make. What is your why, and what are
your rules for that 'why'? How is that manifested?
Okay, the next thing I think about is making sure that
everything you do is in alignment with your values,
okay? Being steered by your own values. So for example, one of
the very big things for me is, I always work in joy. It sounds
crazy, it sounds indulgent. But if I'm not happy doing the work,
then I can't give the best to the people that I work with. So
if I don't feel a resonance with the client on the discovery
call, then I walk away. I don't - I want to have joy in all my
work and to be really upfront with you, when I made that
choice it made life easier for me, and it made sure that all my
work is in joy and my clients feel that and they feel better
for it. So that's one of my 'why's'. I have to feel happy
about the engagement, I don't want to feel like I have to do
something, I feel like I'm joyfully embracing the journey I
take with each client. It just, you know, that's why we're here.
I'm not here for a long time, I want to make a difference. And I
know I make the best difference I can make by being joyful in
how I work, but being happy by helping this other person that
I'm here to help. So that's one of my 'why's'. Okay. And if
someone is not aligned with your values, okay? That doesn't mean
they're a bad person, that just means the two of you aren't a
fit and they were meant to work with somebody else. And that's
how I think about it. It's no judgement on anybody else. It's
no judgement on me, just means we're not connecting here. So I
need to create a space for you to find the person you were
meant to work with. Does more than me in this work, you know?
So, leave that with you. Okay.
Next thing I would say to you is - and this is all leading
somewhere, okay? I promise. So, treat every person you meet with
respect. Really important, it's really important because if you
treat everyone with respect, then when it comes to those
difficult questions, and those difficult conversations, they're
easier to have. Because you respect the other person's
perspective, and you can hear them. That's really important.
You've got to be able to hear them. Okay. So -
Yeah. Yeah, I wanted to say this to you. When I - anytime that I
went against my own values of making sure that I would be
joyful in the experience, I ended up walking away anyway.
And I ended up offering the work that had been done so far,
without cost to them, because it wasn't right. And I always felt
better as a result. So using your values as a guide, is
really critical for this process, because it'll help
steer you best. And when you go against them, that doesn't serve
As well, right? Be very clear what you want from the start so
you. It's that simple. Okay.
that you both have the same expectations. Nobody's confused,
everyone's clear what's expected from each other, makes for a
healthier relationship. If what's delivered doesn't meet
the expectations, then just talk to each other. This is what I
mean by treating everybody with respect as well. Just talk to
each other, as two beautiful human beings that just had
different expectations of what was to be delivered and what was
to be received. And if you can come with respect and
appreciating the perspective of the other person, then the
difficult conversations can be had earlier on. So that they're
not really that difficult, and nothing gets messy and gets
worse. And do it earlier rather than later. Don't allow anything
to fester, okay? Really important. Don't allow it to
Okay, that has been episode 47. And it's been all about
fester. Just be upfront, be respectful. And walk away if you
need to. If you're emotional - I'll also say that to you,
because it has happened to me. If you're emotional, leave space
to cool off because you can't be rational, you can't be
realistic, and you can't see the other perspective. If you can't
see their perspective, then you can't have a constructive
conversation. So allow yourself time to vent it, talk about it
with someone you trust, or just sleep on it. Because sometimes
when you just sleep on it, you can see more clearly the
following day. Sometimes you need another piece of
information before you go forward. So make sure that you
leave space to cool off. That's a lot for you to think about
guys. But I think at the bones of it is clarity, and respect.
If you come with those two things in everything you do, in
your relationships, and also have those difficult
conversations earlier rather than later. But not if you're emotional.
difficult decisions when it comes to your business
relationships. Remember, the other person on the other end,
the receiving end has also had difficult discussions. And if
they're professional and if they're human, you will sort it
out if you treat each other with respect. And walking away is
often the most respectful thing you can do. Have a wonderful
day. Back to my holidays now. I'm going to the pool. And if
you're on holidays, I hope you're enjoying it too. Have a
great day. Take care and I'll see you next week live. Bye bye.