can married couples work together that's what we're gonna answer in this video
stay tuned
can a married couple work together that's my answer no they can't they
can't work together because they're not ready to work together if you as a
couple are thinking about working together and you don't know how to set
this up I'm gonna tell you no don't do it you're gonna cause problems and
you're gonna fight you're gonna argue and you're gonna blame each other and
you are going to not talk to each other one of you is gonna end up sleeping on
the couch and then you're gonna lose money and your business is going to
struggle and it's just not gonna work the answer is no now after you watch
this video I bet you could work together but if you don't do some pre-thought
here and some pre-planning you're gonna mess this up really bad now why do I
know this my wife and I have worked together now for over 17 years in the
beginning hope the answer should have been no we we have argued we have fought
over things we have had silent treatments that we've given each other
we've had contention and conflict and all this stuff happened in our life and
we seriously were not prepared good thing we really are fully committed at
our marriage oh geez I would have drove her nuts and she was
drove me nuts and I don't know where we'd be by now but you got to get ready
for it so the answer is no do not work together until you listen to these steps
and you do these steps okay step number one step number one you need to take the
different parts of the business and you need to take and draw a line down the
middle and you need to write down what you're gonna do and what they're going
to do there has to be a division two people working together as a couple and
a business if there's not a line down the middle then guess what happens
assumptions and you assume there's always going to be
some kind of drama and someone's gonna be mad at somebody else because you were
supposed to do that know you're supposed to do that that was your responsibility
you got to draw the line of the responsibilities now this is going to
change over time but right now you draw the line what are you gonna do what are
they gonna do and if they don't fully agree with their side you're going to
have problems this needs to be negotiated talked about worked out and
give yourself some time really give yourself some time like you know take a
couple weeks to sort through this and to make this list more agreeable between
the two of you because my wife and I with Kim and I we have a line down the
middle I have what I'm responsible for she has what she's responsible for now
notice I'm saying responsible meaning that if I don't do my part I am
responsible for this part it's me and so I get in trouble if I don't do my job
and she gets in trouble if she doesn't get her job do her job now how do they
how do we get in trouble well the trouble is we don't yell at each other
we don't fire each other but we do have discussions and we do get to point the
finger and say that was yours and you didn't do it and it fell apart and
that's because of you so that's called accountability it's not mean responsible
and accountable responsible and accountable and everything that's on my
list I get the final say so everything on her list she gets the final say so
I offer my opinions to what she's doing she can offer her opinions but since I'm
accountable and responsible I get to make the final decision and then over
here she still makes the final decision because she's accountable and
responsible now we can go ask each other for advice we can talk about things we
can plan things but when it comes down to the final decision it is left up to
the person who is over that particular part they get to learn by their choices
and if it works or if it doesn't work but this is
super important and if you're not willing to do this then the answer is no
don't work together this you can work together you can work together now the
next part that you need to come up with after you divide up your
responsibilities the next part that is gonna make a really big difference is
you need to have some ground rules about how you go about doing business what are
the rules and underneath the rules there is the do and the do not the this is how
we do business this is how we do not do business and this is probably a list
that's going to keep growing over time as you have experiences and those
experiences are gonna teach you things but a couple working together and you
don't have rules you're going to have problems rules keep you safe and them
safe and you might find yourself coming back to the rules and going wait what's
the rules about this and this is giving a really smart list for you guys to
build along the way and most likely you're gonna build this because of you
had issues or because you had challenges and you're learning along the way what
to do and what not to do right but okay so you have you divided the
responsibilities and you both agree on it you then have rules to govern what's
going on okay ready for the next part next part is you also have to have an
agreement on hours of operation and what that means is when are you opened and
when are you closed because if a couple works together in
business what that actually means is you could be open for business 24 hours a
day seven days a week now Kim and I we we negotiate this we
have we have office hours you know our office opens up at 8:30 and our office
closes up five-thirty but we don't work by office
hours and what i mean by that is sometimes my appointments start at 4:30
in the morning and at noon I'm done and I go from noon until 4:00 o'clock and I
take 4 hours off in the middle of the day and then I pick it back up at 5:00
and then I work till 11 o'clock at night so I work from 5:00 to 11:00 and 4:30
till noon now that's more than 8 hours a day but that on sometimes that's what my
schedule is and sometimes my the schedule gets negotiated that we're
gonna work from you know 6 a.m. till 6 p.m. 3 days in a row and then we take a
day off but we have to negotiate that we have to talk about that we have to plan
that because if it's not planned when you're working when you're not working
what's gonna happen is you're gonna sit down to your desk as your spouse is
getting up from their desk and you're gonna go wait a minute are you working
and they're like no I've been working for seven hours I'm taking a break
well I'm just sitting down to work you should work to it and there's gonna be
all this miscommunication and assumption going on and you're gonna fight and
you're going to think that they're cheating
you're gonna think they're cheating because you're gonna try to measure them
but you're not it's not written anywhere but a couple that works together and and
and they're doing it in there and they don't have a calendar and a scheduler
what they talked about and they planned it out and and my wife and I we have a
calendar just for her and I about how we plan when we're working and it saved our
marriage because that way we're looking ahead in the in the week and deciding
when we're starting when were ending so it's not a surprise it's not a surprise
I'm getting up at 4 a.m. four days in a row
it's not a surprise that I'm up till 2:00 a.m. finishing a project because
Kim sees it she knows that the counter so she doesn't feel guilty and that I
also am NOT looking at her going are you doing anything so you got to negotiate
your hours and put it in the calendar and then
need to do everything you can to follow that schedule because if you're not
talking about the on and off times you're going to argue about it because
you're gonna think the other one isn't doing their job that's gonna help you
work together but if you don't put that together don't work together okay one
more one more help you out here and in what you're
doing the last one super important super super important here it is separate the
two you're not married to your work there is a time and place to work and
there's a time and place to be married so how do you be married and work
together how do you do that well over here on the married side you date each
other you go on dates often I think a couple who works together actually needs
to date three to four times a week seriously go to lunch go for a drive
together go for a walk together go sit in the hot tub together you know take a
break but you're having dates you need to plan and schedule times to be with
each other and you're not talking about work you're not talking about products
services people employees clients customers schedules bank accounts you're
not talking about that so over here be able to disconnect and stay connected
but this comes and goes this stays constant and but but you got to date
each other more often special little moments cuz over here this can be
intense super intense and if you don't come over here and be all lovey with
each other then intense sneaks over here it starts to bite this starts to eat
this up and then you don't have a marriage anymore you just have a
business partner and once your spouse turns into a business partner then the
intimacy and the passion just dissolve it goes away why do I know this because
of my mistakes I've let work come over here before
I've watched it eat this up and then we'd go back over here and start
rebuilding this but what you do is you plans special moments so that you can
show that you are married so like if Kim and I finish a meeting and it's time for
a special moment we get home you know we get out of our work clothes and and we
get dressed up in our go for a walk clothes and then we go walk for a couple
miles and while we're walking we're holding hands and we're just talking
about nature and the neighbors knowing what's going on in the neighborhood and
but we're holding hands because work was so intense this needs some healing
especially if you're gonna work together you're gonna need more healing and more
connecting moments over here but what happens is couples don't plan for that
and what happens is the marriage starts to pay the price do not sacrifice your
marriage for a great running business it is never worth it why would you want to
lose this over trying to build a great business this has to be the priority and
after work you have in your calendar special moments planned so that you can
keep that marriage in a good soft gentle connection then now you can work
together now you can be together now you can work because you've got these things
put together but if you're not going to do the prep work and thinking this out
you're gonna mess it up and so don't if you're not gonna do the work like I just
showed you don't try it you'll lose your marriage let's make this a definite yes
that you and your spouse can do great work working together in business but
you got to remember got to remember that it's not the business that builds great
marriages you build a great marriage you'll do a lot better in business
down here below right down here below you'll see a link that is a link to a
class called royalty and romance my wife and I Kim and I teach that class and
it's about building strong marriages getting on the same page being super
clear super strong so that the business doesn't cause havoc in your marriage the
marriage is got to move the business not the business move the marriage click the
link check it out it's for you love to see you love to support you in building
a super strong marriage and also by the way click subscribe you know you're
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