Well, who here at the table was self-taught?
Well, I mean, I guess I was.
What makes an artist?
In today's society, where resources
extend beyond just academic school,
people can learn from many different sources.
So, self-taught versus traditional training.
Does it matter?
An artist is
each a unique being.
You know, there's-- I mean, you can go to school, you can not go to school.
I can't say I was really self-taught.
In the beginning,
I looked at it that way and then I said, "I can't say that."
Because my father was a professional,
you know, and he taught me,
he really broke down the science of photography to me.
He instructed me to look at the entire Time Life book series
so I can understand light,
composition, themes, development process.
I can't speak on the advantages or
disadvantages of being self-taught versus
the other method because I didn't do the other method.
I just know the advantages for me of being self-taught.
Which is when you’re self-taught and, like,
being in New York and being hungry
to understand. And literally hungry. Literally literally hungry.
Deciding whether or not to eat dinner or to buy another roll of film.
Yeah, that.
So you're trying to, you just want to, you really want to figure out
this craft that you've come to love so much.
And I think that that yields itself,
I mean, for me, it yielded itself more to finding an esthetic that was
I thought that was mine and that was pure.
To get the chance to bring in young, fresh,
Black and Brown talent
is so important because sometimes
these opportunities are few and far between.
So it's just important because there is a story behind these photos.
I was fortunate enough to go to film school, but through the process
I felt like there was a lot of lack of resources
and even just like concern about telling Black stories and lighting Black
subjects specifically. And so
I dropped out and
I was working a lot on set and learning from my peers
and learning from, like other Black cinematographers
that were putting in the work and have been putting in the work
for years that I literally just did not know about
because we're not taught about them in film school.
You know, with black and white photography
it can become, you know, a lot of people definitely know with the sensors and digital.
It can all look the same and seamless.
So I had to find out how did I want
my work to look?
So I'm going to underexpose.
I'm going to overexpose.
But I'm learning when to do and when not to do it, you know?
But it's interesting because I'm self-taught
and you've got these people that spend all that money to go there,
but guess who--
Guess who's getting booked and paid to come
talk to you?
A self-taught photographer.
I'm coming to your school we're speaking at. I'm going to have to--
I mean, I partially agree, but I have to disagree.
I went-- When I was in high school,
I fell in love with photography. My uncle passed away.
I inherited his camera.
I took the camera out of the closet and I started playing with it
and accidentally took the lens apart, zoom lens apart.
My mom came home.
She was pretty upset.
And she says, if you're going to mess with these cameras
and these lenses, you better learn how to do photography.
Mom said take a photography class
so you learn how to fix the lens, which they don't teach you.
I never got the camera lens back together, but I fell in love
with the process of image making.
I went to college for photography and advertising,
and I think there's a lot of advantages of going to school for photography
because you, one, you develop a community
right away, you get a community of other people.
And you're going to-- Critique is, I think it's essential
because if you're going to survive this industry forever,
you're going to be criticized because you can pick a picture
and next thing you know someone hates your picture.
It helps you develop a strong sense of who you are
I think. I know everyone comes from a different area with that.
But for me, it helped me do that.
Also, just learning the history of photography.
So we don't,
we try to understand where things come from
because you can't reinvent the wheel, but you try to
use certain parts of this experience and put it into your own work.
Or you can also look at YouTube. Which I went to YouTube University.
See there you go.
I'm a blend of both, you know? Absolutely.
You know, as far as
being a still photographer on set.
I didn't even know the job existed.
You know, when we shot School Daze,
I didn't know the equipment that you're supposed to be using. When we shot School Daze,
the first week I was trying to develop my own film
in the bathroom in the hotel.
I didn't know that there was a studio that you could send the film to that
they would process.
I thought I had to do everything myself.
That's how green I was.
You know, so self-taught is,
you know, you can waste time
trying, because you just don't know enough.
You don't know what's happening.
While I do agree with what you're saying about the schooling for certain people
because I think certain people
need to have that experience.
Yeah. But I think in certain experiences
that we have in
how we grow up, depending on whether we,
whether it was a family member
or I went to a Catholic school where structure
and having someone break you down and who-- I've had that already,
I don't need the critique from--
I think it's more than critique.
I think what it gives, it gives you the history, the education, this understanding
about photography.
There's not just about-- There's so much, there's fine art,
there's so many different things that photography, it exposes you to that
so you can gravitate to where you want to go.
And I think it's, for me, it wasn't about just photography.
I was going to college, but you have to break that down and find yourself again.
Yes. That's what it comes down to.
I went to school for photography
and graphic design, so I had training.
As far as the study of photography,
my academic learning
wasn't any preparation at all,
you know, for being a still photographer
on set, you know. I had no,
I really had very little work
as a commercial photographer.
Photography is just like one of those things
where people will bring so much to the table of their own life,
you know, and I was like, "Well, you know, I think I need to be in the real world."
To me, I don't see the value in it
because like you said, you, like,
you control every aspect of it and you don't have to rely on other people
to make your work, like, actually good, like you just know or maybe you don't know.
And you can explore that without the fear of somebody, like, tearing you down.
But I think it's important
just because of this,
the community you get in college, it gives you the time to grow as an artist.
And now,
it was a different time, we didn't have social media.
You guys, you take pictures, you put it on Instagram,
you can be booked the next day for a magazine cover.
That was not, that didn't exist when I was coming up.
It didn't exist.
But you can also get torn down by the world.
It’s like a gift and a curse.
In that one post,and that's the thing.
I think that's the other part of
why it's difficult
because the level of critiquing is harsh.
I just remember sitting outside on the stoop
one day around the way, telling my friends “I think I want to be a photographer”
and like everybody bust out laughing, you know,
because we didn't know any artists or any photographers.
They said, "You got to go to art school or something for that."
And I was like, "Well, if my home girls, can, you know, learn
how to do makeup and lace front wigs from YouTube,
I think I can learn photography."
My parents already, they're like,
"She's going to be a doctor.
She's going to be the first in the family, everything."
And at a point, I had to go months without, like even talking to my dad.
So I remember reaching out to a mentor
a blessed memory,
and he literally put everything in perspective for me. And Kobe,
he was like when he was like, he loved basketball as a kid,
and his teachers felt like
he would never be a good basketball player
He's like, "One thing has to come in one ear and come out the other."
I love feedback.
But there's also feedback that you should not listen to like that
can really bring you down.
And one of the biggest fears that I have
is sometimes just asking myself, am I--
You know, you look in a room and you're just like,
"Am I worthy to be here?" At the end of the day,
are you authentic?
Is there a genuineness in why you're doing what you're doing?
And I think once I'm able to answer those questions, this
fear just kind of like evens out.
and everything comes-- it gets better.
But it’s a cycle
and I think it’s going to be a constant cycle.
as a creative-
For the rest of your life.
Ok we’re gonna cut it.
He wants me to cut it.
I gotta cut it.
Whether self-taught, a graduate or a mix of both,
we can all agree on one thing.
There's no one way to have the eye.
True visionaries come from all parts
of the globe and walks of life,
and all of our stories combined to form the fullness of who we are.
The quest to always seek more knowledge is what turns the naturally gifted
into icons.
I'm where I’m at now.
Not on my own,
but because so many people
have helped me.
My community
of Black photographers
who made it a little bit easier.
You just can't do it alone.
Having Black women on my crew
specifically has always helped
me feel so supported.
My fear is letting down my community
in some way like “is my work
Black enough? Is my work Queer enough?”
I have my days of imposter syndrome.
Came to a point
where I ask myself, Juan are you happy?
My career is not just my own.
You know, I have obligations to
my community and my people.