>>>
>>> ANXIETY IS THE LEADING MENTAL HEALTH ISSUE AMONG
AMERICAN YOUTH AND EXPERTS
SUGGEST IT IS RISING.
RESEARCHERS FOUND 20% INCREASE
IN DIAGNOSIS OF ANXIETY BETWEEN
2007-2012.
2007-2012. IN HER NEW BOOK, THE
EMOTIONALLY HEALY CHILD,
MAUREEN FEELEY GIVES PARENTS A
REAL KNIFE STRATEGY THEY NEED
TO RAISE EMOTIONALLY HEALTHY
CHILDREN.
CHILDREN.
CHILDREN. WHAT DOES THAT LOOK LIKE?
>> THE IDEA IS THAT EMOTIONALLY
HEALTHY KIDS LEARN.
YOU NEED TO IDENTIFY EMOTIONS .
TYPICALLY WE REACT , WE SCREAM
AND YELL AND THROW THINGS.
>> WHY DID YOU SEE THIS AS A
BIG PROBLEM?
BIG PROBLEM? WHAT DID YOU SEE THAT MADE YOU
DECIDE THAT THIS NEEDS A BOOK?
>> I KEPT SEEING CHILDREN IN MY
OFFICE THAT DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO
ACT AND THE PARIS DIDN'T KNOW
HOW TO HANDLE IT.
SO I WOULD ASK THEM HOW BIG
THEIR ANGER WAS.
AND THEY WOULD SAY GIGANTIC SO
I WOULD TELL THEM IT COULD NOT
BE BIGGER THAN THEY ARE.
SO THEY COULD BE HAPPIER AND IT
WOULD BE EASIER IF THEY COULD
MANAGE THAT.
MANAGE THAT. >> THEY GO FROM THIS UNHEALTHY
LEVEL TWO HAVING IT ALTOGETHER
. WHAT ARE THE STAGES?
>> IT IS A CONSTANT , THIS IS
SOMETHING THAT WE ALL
CONSTANTLY WORK ON.
BUT YOU DON'T WANT TO BE
OVERREACTIVE.
OVERREACTIVE. YOU DON'T WANT TO THROW IN --
THINGS.
THINGS.
THINGS. IT IS OUT OF BALANCE.
SO HOW DO WE GET BACK TO
BALANCE.
BALANCE.
BALANCE. HOW CAN THEY LEARN THE THINGS
THAT ARE GOOD FOR YOU AND GOOD
FOR OTHERS.
FOR OTHERS. >> EASY STEPS, NUMBER ONE,
STOP.
STOP.
STOP. WHAT IS THAT?
>> HOW CAN YOU CATCH YOURSELF.
TYPICALLY A CHILD, PUSHING
SOMEONE ON THE PLAYGROUND,
SCREAMING, THROWING SOMETHING.
HOW DO WE GAIN SELF-AWARENESS.
>> WE WANT TO HELP THEM STOP.
>> THERE'S A CHAPTER IS
MINDFULNESS AND SELF-AWARENESS.
THEY HAVE DIFFERENT CHOICES .
IT DOESN'T FEEL GOOD TO PUSH
SOMEONE ON THE PLAYGROUND.
SO LEARNING HOW TO IDENTIFY
THOSE THINGS.
THOSE THINGS. >> THERE IS THE LOGICAL SIDE
VERSUS THE EMOTIONAL SIDE.
WHEN YOU'RE A BABY, EVERYTHING
IS EMOTIONAL.
IS EMOTIONAL. BUT AT SOME POINT THEY HAVE TO
LEARN TO GO TO THAT LEFT SIDE.
THAT IS WHEN THE CHILD IS
FEELING OUT OF CONTROL . THEY
HAVE TO LEARN INTELLECTUALLY TO
THINK ABOUT HOW DO I FEEL.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
>> ABSOLUTELY. WE TALKED ABOUT EMOTIONS, FOR
EXAMPLE ANGER.
EXAMPLE ANGER. REMEMBER IT'S LIKE A CLOUD IN
THE SKY.
THE SKY.
THE SKY. KIDS LEARN DIFFERENT THINGS
WHEN LOGIC COMES ONLINE.
WE WANT TO DO OUR BEST TO
DISPLAY THE GOOD EMOTIONS.
>> THEN THE SECOND STAGE IS
CALM.
CALM.
CALM. >>
CALM. >> I WOULD SAY THAT IS THE MOST
USEFUL.
USEFUL.
USEFUL. SO LEARNING HOW TO CALM
THEMSELVES IS IMPORTANT.
WHETHER IT IS TAKING A BREATH,
OR WHATEVER.
OR WHATEVER. >> YOU WERE TEACHING THE CHILD
TO HOLD THEIR OWN HAND.
AND I TRY THIS AT HOME.
YOU CAN ACTUALLY HOLD YOUR OWN
HAND AND THAT WILL BRING SOME
OF THE SAME COMMUNIST.
>> IT IS COMING BACK TO THE
PRESENT MOMENT.
PRESENT MOMENT. YOU MIGHT BE ANGRY ABOUT
SOMETHING AND THERE ARE LOTS OF
TOOLS TO USE TO CALM AND
RELAXED.
RELAXED.
RELAXED. >> THE THIRD STAGE IS MAKE A
SMART CHOICE.
SMART CHOICE. HOW DO YOU GET A CHILD TO MAKE
A SMART CHOICE?
>> IT REALLY MAKES SENSE , WHEN
YOU IDENTIFY A SITUATION, LIKE
YOU COULD THROW A CHAIR ACROSS
A CLASSROOM AND WE KNOW THAT IS
NOT A GOOD CHOICE.
THAT THE IDEA IS THAT THERE ARE
OBJECTS , WHAT ELSE COULD I
HAVE DONE IN THAT SITUATION,
WHETHER IT IS AT HOME OR AT
SCHOOL.
SCHOOL.
SCHOOL. IN THAT MOMENT, WHEN YOU ARE
ANGRY, IT IS HARD TO REMEMBER
THAT THAT'S WHEN YOU WANT TO
BRING ALL THESE ELEMENTS OF THE
BOOK TOGETHER.
BOOK TOGETHER. >> IT SEEMS LIKE EVERY
SITUATION IS CONTROLLED BY A
GROWN UP.
GROWN UP.
GROWN UP. SO YOU ARE TELLING THESE KIDS
THAT THEY HAVE TOOLS.
THEY HAVE STRONG FEELINGS AND
EMOTIONS AND THEY COULD MOVE IN
A MORE POSITIVE DIRECTION.
>> THESE THINGS ARE NOT BAD, IT
IS WHAT WE DO WITH THEM.
THEY ARE IN THEIR CONTROL.
>> HOW MUCH DO KIDS FOLLOW THE
LEAD OF GROWN-UPS?
SOMETIMES WE DON'T ALWAYS
EXHIBIT GREAT EMOTIONAL CONTROL
. DOES THAT AFFECT CHILDREN?
>> THEY TEND TO MIMIC THE
ADULTS AROUND THEM.
IF WE MAKE A BOO-BOO OR MISTAKE
OR WE SCREAM, WE CAN ALWAYS
CORRECT THAT.
CORRECT THAT. YOU COULD SAY, WE ARE LEARNING
TOGETHER, I NEED TO IMPROVE ON
THAT.
THAT.
THAT. >>
THAT. >> I SAID SOMETHING THE OTHER
DAY WITH MY CHILD AND I SOON
LEARNED THAT I WAS TEACHING MY
CHILD TO SAY THIS BAD WORD.
NOW YOU TALKED ABOUT HOMELESS
VERSUS HAPPINESS.
VERSUS HAPPINESS. IS THAT THE BALANCING ACT?
>> WE WANT TO BE HAPPIER WHICH
IS A TRAP.
I WANT MY CHILD TO BEHAVE
BETTER OR WHATEVER IT IS.
WE WANT TO BE WHOLE , WE WANT
TO IDENTIFY ALL OF THESE
FEELINGS.
FEELINGS.
FEELINGS. WE WANT TO HAVE THE WHOLE
PICTURE.
PICTURE.
PICTURE. WE WANT TO HAVE A MEANINGFUL
LIFE, THAT'S WHAT WE ALL REALLY
WANT.
WANT.
WANT. >>
WANT. >> THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR
WRITING THIS BOOK.
I THINK IT WILL HELP A LOT OF
PARENTS.
PARENTS.
PARENTS. SHE WILL BE DOING A BOOK
SIGNING TONIGHT AT 7:00 AT
THIRD PLACE BOOKS . HEAD OVER
TO THE WEBSITE AND WE WILL HAVE
A LINK TO HER WEBSITE.
>>> DON'T GO ANYWHERE.