In this video, we're going to be talking about signs your ex still has feelings for you.
First, my name is Clay with ModernLove.Life, where we help you get the great loving relationship
you're looking for without having to play mind games, without having to play hard to
get, and without having to pretend to be someone or something that you are not, because you
of course deserve to be loved for the unique, amazing, and wonderful person that you are.
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Also, we are talking about the emotional connection that your ex has for you in this video, so
if you want to learn more about your ex's emotional world, including how to navigate
that emotional world, you might want to check out our course called the Ex Solution Program.
You can find information on that down below in the description box for this video.
Okay, so let's get into the signs that your ex still has feelings for you. The first one
is that they compare you to other people, especially in a romantic sense obviously,
or potentially to their rebound they might be in. As the years have gone by, I've heard
more and more stories about people's exes getting into rebound relationships. It seems
to be more of an accelerating trend as we move forward. Maybe less so a long time ago,
but there are theories for this. We can talk about that some other time.
But if your ex is saying like, "Oh, my new partner is so much better than you, my ex,
because they're generous, they're thoughtful, they're caring, whatever, that just shows
that they're still emotionally anchored to you and they're still comparing the two of
you together, the rebound and you, or this person that they have a crush on and you.
It shows that they're sort of comparing the two of you together, sort of like they're
weighing their options. Is it going to be you, or is it going to be this other person?
That sort of shows this mental process they're going through in their mind where they're
trying to figure out which one of them do they actually prefer. This just goes to show
you that there is still a very strong emotional anchor to you in their mind, that they're
still trying to work out how they feel, how they are evaluating you compared to others
and so on and so forth. The second sign that your ex still has feelings
for you is if there's a strong emotional reaction that they have to the chapter of your life
that the two of you shared together. The two of you may have been together, I don't know,
maybe you were like high school sweethearts or maybe you met in college or something like
that, and they're talking about, "Oh, back when I was in college." It's like, "That happens
to be around the time that we got together," or something. "Back when I was in college,
I went through this experience. It was this great period of my time, a great period of
my life, and things like that. This just shows you that they're associating
positivity or they're associating some sort of strong emotional reaction to a certain
chapter that they shared with you. Now, even if they're not directly talking about you
and the impact that you had on them in that point in time, just know that the relationship
that they probably had with you is one of the main things that's going to color and
give meaning and give a sort of undertone, emotional vibe so to speak to a chapter of
someone's life. If your ex is talking with a strong degree of emotionality about that
chapter that they shared with you, then it just shows that they are still kind of emotionally
anchored to you because you, of course, and your relationship together was a significant
part of that time most likely. The third sign that your ex still has feelings
for you is if they talk about the future and they mention doing things together with you.
Like, "Oh yeah, we should go and do that next summer, or when the pandemic is over, or when
all the crazy 2020 stuff is behind us or whatever." When they start creating a future with you
in it, even if it's in a negative sort of way, like, "Well, I don't know if we can really
do that. Maybe next time we're at so-and-so's birthday party next year, I'm not sure how
it would work out," or something. They're seeing you in their future and they are kind
of talking about that. I mean, especially if there's like an emotional undercurrent
in that conversation, it just shows that there is more of that emotional anchor.
But if they're kind of creating a future, a vision in their mind of what the future
might look like and you occupy space in that vision, that you shows that they're thinking
about you. They're thinking about a future with you. They're thinking about sharing memories
with you. They're thinking about sharing experiences with you. That of course is an important sign
that your ex still has feelings for you. By the way, before we go ahead and get further
on in this video, if you do want to learn more about your ex's emotional world, which
is kind of what we're talking about here, what they're feeling, you might want to check
out a playlist that we put together on the five stages your ex goes through emotionally
in getting back together with you. You can find that playlist right up there. A lot of
people have said that it's been a very helpful playlist in terms of explaining the five stages
for them and helping them to understand their ex's sometimes confusing behavior. Feel free
to check it out if you want to learn more about that.
All right, now that that's all done, the next sign that your ex still has feelings for you
is if they are remembering important details. Now, of course, these include things like
your birthday and all that, but these also include small things too. Like, do they remember
certain details about how something happened in your relationship with one another, like
certain small events? Like, "Oh, and then you said this, and then this thing happened."
Whether they're kind of remembering it in a kind way, like, "Oh, and then you did this
really charming thing. You stood up to me for this one person," or they're remembering
it in a sort of petty way like, "And then it took you 34 minutes to text me back. I
can't believe that," or something like that, it just shows that there's that emotional
charge in the memory that they're having of you, which of course is demonstrative of an
emotional anchor that's being attached to you in their mind or in their heart, wherever
you want to say that your emotions live. But it just shows that if they're still hung up
on the details, then they are still kind of emotionally wrapped up.
Oftentimes if we are not hung up on the details, it's because we don't really care about things.
If they are hung up on the details, it shows that they still care a lot.
The fifth sign that your ex still has feelings for you is that they defensively justify why
the two of you broke up. Now, of course, if you talk to anyone about why them and their
ex broke up, they'll give you some sort of reason. It doesn't necessarily mean that they
still have feelings for them. I've spoken before in the past about my relationship
with my big ex and why we broke up, and basically how we just had different values, and we realized
that if one of us, if we were going to actually be together in a relationship, either one
or both of us would end up being unhappy just because we want a different things in life.
That doesn't mean that I'm still like emotionally attached to her. I'm not like defensively
emotionally justifying like, "Oh, we had so much in common, but we just ... Like there
was such intense passion, but we just had different things in life. It pulled us apart."
Like that's an entirely different sort of energy.
Or it's like, you know, "Oh yeah, we just had different things. We just wanted different
things out of life. But she did all these terrible things, and it justified why we broke
up, and she's an awful person," or something like that, right? These sorts of things signify
a defensive justification for why the breakup happened. If there's a defensive justification
for why it happened, it means that there's something happening emotionally in there.
There's maybe one part of them that says, "Hey, there were some positive aspects to
this relationship, but also there was some negative aspects too, which is why we broke
up." It's sort of like justifying why the breakup happened. There was this negative
thing that canceled out the positive thing. Whereas if you're just talking about as if
it's something that happened, you just talk about it as if it's something that happened,
right? There's not necessarily all of this emotional intensity wrapped up in the whole
process. If your ex is defensively justifying why the two of you broke up rather than having
this just matter of fact, "Hey, we want a different things," or, "We just drifted apart,"
or something like that, then it shows that they are still very much emotionally attached
to you and still very much have feelings for you.
Okay, so basically the main lesson from all of this is that we want to look at what is
motivating your ex's behaviors. Is it something that's driving them from an emotional place?
If it is driving them from an emotional place, we can assume that they still have emotional
feelings wrapped up around us. That's really what you want to be looking
at through this whole journey is, what is motivating them to do things? What is causing
them to say or do whatever they're saying and doing? Most likely, it's some sort of
emotional thing. If you notice a lack of emotion there, then that's an entirely different story,
but don't confuse a lack of emotion with them veiling or concealing a very strong emotional
state as well. This is obviously something that people can sometimes do. They put on
an act as if they don't care when really they care very, very, very deeply.
Anyway, if you want to learn more about all of this emotional stuff, we do have our course
called the Ex Solution Program. You can find it down in the description box below this
video. But once again, if you did find this valuable and helpful, please help me out by
hitting that thumbs up button for this video. It helps to promote us in the YouTube algorithm.
Also, you might want to check out this video series over here on your ex's emotional world,
their five stages of getting back together, or you might want to check out this video
right here. But thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for watching. Once
again, my name is Clay, and I'll talk to you next time.