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- God, I don't even know
if I'd consider that the smartest response.
Not the smartest response possible,
I mean, (digital beeping)
but like, sometimes having compassion
is what's smart, you know? (sighing)
Although fighting's cool too.
I mean, you are a cave woman from the future
who hunts robot dinosaurs,
so maybe the fist is the most in-character.
Oh man, I don't know, I don't know.
Tell me this guy's whole backstory again.
Omit no detail. - Dude!
When I said you could help me choose dialogue options
I was just trying to make you feel involved.
Since when do you agonize over decisions in video games?
I remember I asked you which
Mortal Kombat X Online clan I should join
and you just yanked the TV plug out of the wall.
- I think it's the graphics, man.
I mean, most of the games you play,
you're asking me to care about some lizard with a mask on
or some anime bobblehead getting stabbed
by a sheet of construction paper.
- If you are referring to the tragic
assassination of Aerith, then so help me God.
- I wouldn't even know because
I don't even care. (gasping)
And that's why, to people who aren't freaks,
graphics will always matter.
- But Grim Fandango.
But Inside.
But surely Journey.
- Hey, I can yell words at you too.
You know, dangerous mouth.
Loudness, snake pass.
- That last one actually is a game.
- God damn it, the point is, you're so proud
of how video games are this different medium from movies,
except every time I see you play a game
that I actually end up giving a (bleep) about,
it's because the graphics are super good
and it almost looks like a movie.
Last of Us, Red Dead Redemption.
I can only name two because I'm not a huge nerd.
- I could name eight,
but that doesn't make you any less wrong.
By that logic, L.A. Noire should be
the most engrossing game of all time.
That had painstaking facial animations,
to the point that you could tell
when someone was like, lying or hiding an emotion.
You know, acting suspicious.
And yet, spoiler alert, very few people cared.
- How can you say that good graphics
aren't the end goal, when they've been the end goal
of every kind of entertainment in history?
- Explain how?
- Oh I will, because I spend as much time
bettering myself in the real world
as you do bettering characters in virtual worlds.
- Hey, I said explain, not ruin our friendship.
- Sorry, but take any media.
- Norwegian death metal. - Shut up for a second.
Take any visual media, let's start with theater.
You know, back in ancient Greece,
actors would literally hold up
giant masks representing their emotion
because the stadiums were so big, that was the only way
to tell what their character was feeling.
That's why those masks are the drama logo, and that sucked.
That's why we don't do that anymore.
You know, no one's gonna sit here and argue
that's more effective than a close-up in a movie
showing Viola Davis whipping out an Oscar.
- Well, I mean I can argue anything,
but it would just be to defy you.
- Movie started out as like film plays, you know,
or puppet theater, commedia dell'arte (bleep).
And guess what we don't watch anymore?
- Hey, The Artist won Best Picture pretty recently.
- Raise your hand if you saw The Artist.
(groaning)
Reality TV became popular by pretending
to be more real than scripted shows.
Caveman paintings are rad,
but they don't get me more invested
than a Rembrandt portrait, and last but not least,
first wave Norwegian death metal
was marked by chugging, primitive riffs and low growls
that expanded to feature falsetto screaming
and oversized drum kits to add more depth.
- Wow, that true about death metal?
- Probably not, but I win the argument and being classier.
- And snootier and wronger.
What you're basically saying is
that the journey doesn't matter at all,
only the destination.
Like okay, okay, what about when
there's ultra-realistic VR headset movies?
You saying now Jurassic Park is moot?
You really gonna tell me Jurassic Park
is no longer a valid piece of art?
You're gonna sit there with your damn filth mouth
and take a triceratops-size (bleep)
on Jurassic God damn Park?
- No, but if they release JP as a VR movie in 2035
I'm gonna be there opening night, and so will you.
- Too true, too true.
- I'm not fist bumping for that.
- Buster Keaton.
- What about him?
- I don't know, you're just making me feel stupid.
I wanted to catch up.
John Coltrane. - Please stop.
Let's tell this guy to kick rocks.
- Alright, finally a decision.
- You think she was better because she was smart,
because she designed Zero Dawn.
But you miss the point. - Well no,
not really happy with how that worked out.
Should I reload and try again
or you want to play something else?
- Sure, if the facial animation
and voice actor are equally good.
- Cool cool, alright.
Well then let's try Mass Effect: Andromeda.
I just downloaded it.
Oh, and it has the same story deal
where you can make moral choices
and harangue your roommate about it.
You'll love it. - (laughs) Yeah.
- [Video Game Voice] Scott.
- Is my sister okay?
- Sara's fine.
Her vitals are strong,
but the revival procedure was interrupted.
- I don't like the sound of that.
(grumbling)
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