I think you have one of the most original comedic voices
that I've encountered.
There's no one else like you, and you would come on our show
and you would do stuff that I hadn't seen anybody do.
Well, I didn't see anybody do anything like it
on other late night spots.
And I thought, this is a real find, this Tig Notaro.
I mean, it was a joy.
It was a joy to discover you and have you come on the show.
Well, I appreciate that.
The feeling is mutual
And what was exciting for me was,
I mean, this wasn't the exciting part, but for years
I was turned down for talk shows and late night.
Or I'd have, you know, one shot or no shot.
And I would get feedback that my delivery was too slow
or not enough jokes per minute I heard
and too low-key, not mainstream enough.
And then when I got a shot to come on your show,
I remember leaving the studio and I got a call
from my manager saying that your show had called
to have me booked again immediately.
Yes.
And that you wanted me to be a regular on the show.
And I couldn't even comprehend that
because of all of the rejection I had gotten.
And I feel like your show gave me
this incredible opportunity to be myself,
to try out weird things.
And it also, I'm certain, went hand-in-hand
with me being welcomed onto so many other talk shows.
Well, I mean, what I remember
is you came on your first show.
You did some really unique impressions
that were really funny.
And we said, "Oh God, she's really great.
Let's have her come back."
You came back.
Now, most people in that situation would say,
I've gotta be conservative.
I'm getting my second shot, gotta make sure it's safe.
On your second shot, for most of your shot,
for most of your act
you slowly pushed a stool across the stage,
which was the gutsiest thing anybody would try.
Even if it was your 15th time on the show,
maybe you'd try it, but it would still feel risky.
It was your second time on the show
and it was hilarious, but...
It was a stool bigger than this.
It was a stool bigger than that.
Do you remember this, Andy?
[Andy] Yeah.
And Tig was- And it made a horrible noise
which was the point. Yeah, it was the point.
(laughs) And you were pushing it around and that was,
if someone had pitched that to me I would've said,
there's no way that's going to work.
[Tig] Uh-huh
Fortunately they didn't (laughs) and you just did it.
Well, when I pitched it to your producer-
[Conan] Probably J.P. Buck, yeah, yeah.
Exactly who, J.P.
He was like, "All right, I trust you.
I just, let's see it."
And so he did come down and watch me do it,
I think at The Comedy Store.
[Conan] Yeah.
And to be fair, it doesn't work for a long time.
(Conan laughing) (Andy laughing)
(Conan clapping)
There is a long stretch where-
There's a long stretch where it's not working.
[Tig] It doesn't work.
And you have to commit to it.
Well, also a shout out to J.P Buck who does a beautiful job
of finding amazing people like you
and just enriching our show so much.
Well Conan, I'll have you know I've been in Toronto
for four weeks filming "Star Trek"
and was then in New York for the Tribeca Film Festival.
I flew home just to do this episode
to say my farewells and my thank yous to you
because I have to go back to Tribeca after I do this.
That's crazy, you flew, I'm told, yeah,
you were saying you flew-
I got on the first flight this morning.
And you flew here. Flew here.
Went right to your house. Took a shower.
My sons who I hadn't seen at this point in five weeks said,
"Look how big we got!"
How cute and sad at the same time.
I hugged them, kissed them, and yeah,
after I took a shower ran out the door and came to Largo.
So you're a terrible parent, is what you're saying.
I am, I choose you over my adorable, precious children.
What I do with my kids, whenever they said,
"Daddy, Daddy, we love you" is I'd put my hands
over their faces and push them away and say,
"Show business first."
That's what I do. (Tig laughing)
That's how they've grown up and they understand now.
They understand. (Andy chuckling)
Do you miss the, Andy, you've seen it, right?
I've seen it, I've seen it. (Conan laughing)
It's a good bit, it's a good bit.
It's not a bit! (laughs) Well...
It's just getting hard now because my son is like 6'2''
so I have to like, yeah, he's right up. (laughs)
When I'm an old man and they're like,
"We love you, Daddy, you're leaving this Earth."
[Tig] Oh my God, speaking of-
And I meant show business first!
Speaking of old man. Yeah.
My children are deathly afraid of becoming old men.
Like, they start to cry.
They'll ask- How old are they?
There'll be five in two weeks.
(crew members laughing) And they say out of nowhere,
"Am I gonna be an old man?"
[Conan] Oh no!
And we say, "Well, you know,
what do you think an old man is?"
And they're like, "I don't know, just."
And then they imitate an old man
and it is their worst nightmare.
Like, tears in their eyes and it comes up,
I mean, near daily.
Am I gonna be an old man?
And what's crazy is Stephanie's father moved in with us
and we ask, you know, his name is Papa Grande.
It's his God-given name and we say-
Right, and his rapper name. Yeah.
We say, "Is Papa Grande an old man?"
And they say, "No."
And we're like, "Yeah, he is."
[Conan] So where do they get this?
(Andy laughing)
News flash. (laughs) Yeah.
But I mean, we don't know what an old man,
we don't know what happened.
They're both terrified. That's so funny.
You've got to start telling them, from what I can tell
being an old man is fantastic. Yeah.
Because you get to say whatever you want.
[Tig] Mm-hmm.
You get to be a complete pain in the ass.
And you could probably eat ice cream all day.
I mean, I even went to the point of asking,
"Am I an old man?
Because we're trying to understand.
And they were like, "No." Right.
But we know they saw something somewhere.
They saw an old man. They saw an old man.
Definitely made a bad impression on them.
Yeah, but but Stephanie's father is not an old man.
[Conan] Okay.
Well, it may be that they just got out of the phase
of pooping themselves and not being able to walk very well
and they don't want to go back there anytime soon.
[Conan And Tig] That's true.
You know, how the end of life
and the beginning of life are very similar.
[Tig] Having a hard time walking and diapers.
Yeah. And all that, yeah.
[Andy] That could be it.
Okay. They're just, you know,
trying not to Benjamin Button it.
Yeah. They're always saying,
"I just want to be a kid forever."
And they love candy and toys.
They're the most generic children.
[Conan] Yeah.
(Andy laughing) (crew members laughing)
That's all. Your complaint
is they're generic. (laughs) They're so adorable,
but they are so terrified to be old men