As parents, we want bedtimes
to run as smoothly as possible.
We want to know that when we pop our little ones to bed
that they're perfectly ready for sleep time.
But what do we do when our toddler starts to fight bedtime
or take a while to fall asleep?
Today I'm going to be answering in your sleep question.
My toddler is taking ages to fall asleep at bedtime.
What can I do?
In this short video, I'm going to go through a few things
that could be causing this.
And I have some tricks that we can implement
to help make bedtimes run a lot more smoothly.
Hi, my name is Josephine Cavallo
and I'm a sleep expert at Little Ones.
I'm a mother to two beautiful little girls
and I've also got one little one on the way.
At Little Ones, our passion is baby and toddler sleep.
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Please tell us in the comment box
how long does it take your toddler to fall asleep?
Is there some battles or is it smooth sailing?
So back to your sleep question.
Your little one is taking a long time to fall asleep,
and you're wanting to improve this.
There is definitely no harm in that.
Being a mother of two little toddlers,
bedtime plays a big part of our evening.
And it's something that I do want to go smoothly.
So what could be going on here?
It could be our toddlers day nap length
that's impacting bedtime.
It could be their room environment.
It could be their bedtime routine.
So what's happening leading up to bedtime?
So let's start with their day naps.
It makes sense if our toddlers are having
just so much day sleep what's going to happen?
Bedtime is going to be a struggle.
So we continuously keep an eye on that day sleep.
From 18 months right through until they drop that nap,
we will need to tweak that day nap length.
So if we notice that our little ones aren't tired
at bedtime, they're waking more overnight,
they're waking at 5:00 to 6:00 AM in the morning.
Then we can assume that, that day nap is just too long.
So we can start by reducing that day's sleep by 15 minutes
and give it a week.
Often, just reducing it by 15 minutes can make a world
of difference.
Around two and a half, three years old
our toddler is prepared to drop this nap.
So if that nap is already quite short,
and you're still finding that your toddler
is taking a really long time to fall asleep at bedtime,
it could be time to say goodbye to that day sleep.
Now on the flip side,
if our toddlers are overtired at bedtime,
you may notice that they're still taking a long time
to settle.
So if you've dropped that day's sleep
or your toddler has skipped that nap,
but you're still finding at bedtime they're struggling.
It could be that they're overtired.
So I know with my two and a half year old
some days she just skips that nap completely.
We try not to stress.
We just head for an earlier bedtime.
So with my little girl, if she doesn't have a day sleep,
we aim for a six o'clock, 6:15 bedtime.
This way we know she's not overtired
and she can still have a really good night sleep.
So that's my tip number one.
Check for under or over tiredness
causing these bedtime struggles.
Now another quick fix could be just
to recheck their room environment.
Even as an older toddler,
their room environment is going to play a big part
in how long they take to settle for us.
If there's light coming around the window,
then that's going to tell our toddler,
hang on the sun's still up, I should still be up.
So we like to have a really, really dark sleep environment.
White noise, or an audio book can be really good
to give our toddlers something to tune into
and switch off and fall asleep.
So you can always give that a try.
We still want the cot at this age for our little ones.
The longer you hold on to that cot
for your toddler, the better.
So if your toddler isn't climbing the bars,
or still fits in that cot, I'd be keeping that around.
Because if we try to get rid of the cot too soon,
or when they're 18 months or two years old,
then you may find that they're just gonna get up
and get out of bed and play a lot more at bedtime.
They just don't know how to lay down and stay down
if they're in a bed, it's just too exciting for them.
So if you can keep that cot around.
Just while we are on the topic of the room environment,
I will mention that if your toddler is at that age
where they've got an imagination,
and you're noticing that come bedtime they're not so happy
about us switching off the lights
or you're noticing that they're getting quite distressed
when they're in a dark sleep environment,
then it could be a sign that they have a fear of the dark.
This is not totally uncommon
for a two and a half, three year old.
So if you find that they're taking ages to fall asleep
and they're quite upset then it could be a fear.
Fear of the dark.
So if that's the case for your little one,
we can always try a dim red nightlight.
It should reassure them and give them some peace of mind.
Now, another thing that can play a big part
in how long our toddlers take to fall asleep
is the steps leading up to bedtime.
I know with my little girls if we have a family dinner
or a party or a function
and they have chocolate cake or ice cream,
or treats all that sugar is going to cause havoc at bedtime.
So when we can try to avoid it,
I try to avoid sugary foods especially close to bedtime.
Another thing that can play a big part is screen time.
If our little ones are having iPads,
tablets or TV time even if it's just on in the background,
it can still be a lot for their little brains to process
and it can be really, really stimulating for them.
And then that's going to have a domino effect
on their bedtime or on their ability to fall asleep.
So we recommend avoiding screen time after five o'clock
in the afternoon.
With my little girls, they respond really, really well
to a good wind down time in the evening.
So we try to keep it as calming as possible.
No wrestling games, no tickling games close to bedtime.
We try to play some calming music,
try to keep the lights in the house really, really dim
just to get them in that sleepy mood.
Now I will add as a little side note, after 18 months old
some fluffing at bedtime can be really, really common.
So what I mean by this is if we lay our toddler
in their cot, the room environment is perfect.
They haven't had too much day sleep.
We've had a really good bedtime routine
but they're still rolling around chatting,
playing with their cuddly,
sitting up in bed, laying down again.
And then they're just fluffing around taking a while
to drift off to sleep just know that this can be common.
After 18 months old, our little ones do need
to wind down after a big day.
They're not just going to fall asleep
as soon as we lay them down.
So know that this can be common.
It's totally okay to leave them to it.
The only time when we would interfere
is if they are getting upset or distressed.
So if you are finding that your toddler
is getting quite upset when it comes to bedtime settling,
then we would go down the path of ruling out
the fear of the dark as I discussed before.
And during this time,
try to keep a good, steady settling approach.
So we try not to bring in any new sleep associations,
like rocking them, patting them,
helping them all the way to sleep.
Because if you didn't wanna continue that down the track,
then it may not be a good time to start.
So to summarize.
If your toddler is taking ages to fall asleep
have another look at their day sleep.
See if it needs to be reduced.
Take another look at their room environment.
See if there's anything we can tweak
to help get them in that sleepy mood.
Have a look at what is happening leading up to bed time.
Is there possibly something going on
that's impacting their ability to fall asleep?
If you're needing some extra help
with these bedtime battles, please reach out to us.
We would love to help.
For more information
on how you can join our Little One's sleep program.
Please visit our website, www.littleones.co.
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Bye.