Good evening Chancellor, Vice-Chancellor, distinguished guests, graduates, family
and friends, thank you to everyone for the opportunity to speak to you all on
your special night. I have been a student at the School of Biomedical Sciences,
a nursing student, a Midwifery student and before it was a university degree, I even
had a go at being a Paramedic student. I've been an undergraduate student,
a postgraduate student, I've thought about being a Master's student, but I don't
think I'll ever be a PhD student. So to the 350 graduating students here today,
I'm sure that I can relate to most of you on some level. When I was invited to
do this address, I was gobsmacked to say the least.
Why would Curtin want someone like me to inspire this new bunch of graduates?
Although in recent years I have had many successes, in the beginning I was fraught
with setbacks. So the theme of my speech tonight is setbacks. My first setback.
When trying to decide what I wanted to be when I grew up, nursing was always
number one on my list. However as my ever wise mother pointed out, I was incredibly
squeamish, would faint at the mere sight of blood and had the biggest needle
phobia you could possibly imagine. So probably not the greatest career move.
Being 17, I had no clue what to do next, so we thought given that I loved human
biology in high school, I'd apply for that degree. Back then the TEE score
required for that was 330, easy. Enter setback number two, I failed and scored 230.
Curtin weren't even going to look at me. Plan C, repeat year 12 at Canning College, great
let's do that. Setback number three, they didn't want me either. You see the
average improvement in marks was about sixty points and I needed a hundred. I'm not
sure how, but we convinced them that I was capable and they let me in.
I was capable because I got my 100 points and scored 330 as promised. And then by some
ridiculous twist of fate, the aggregate for my dream course went up to 340.
Hello setback number four, you suck. But here's my first piece of advice to you,
there is nothing wrong with begging, and boy did I beg Curtin for that second
round offer, and luckily for me it worked. So three years later, I graduated
with my Human Biology degree from the School of Biomedical Sciences, now what.
I gave education ago and started doing a DipEd,
but after one day at Rossmoyne Senior High School with year 12 students
who looked older than me, and a preceptor who wanted me to teach their geology class,
I realised this was not the course for me. I tried paramedics and made it to
the final 40 applicants of hundreds that applied. Surprising, given that during my
driving test, I was asked what I thought about driving the ambulance and I
completely took my hands off the wheel saying, I expected the steering wheel to
be bigger, as I was turning right through a set of traffic lights. Then armed with
my needle phobia, I made the bizarre decision to give
phlebotomy a go. Obvious choice for a needle phobic. That course was held here
at Curtin just a week I think. I didn't sleep the whole weekend before,
absolutely packing my dacks that not only was I going to learn how to take blood,
but that someone was actually going to practise on me. You can imagine
my sheer delight when the morning of the course, we all received phone calls that
the facilitator was ill and the course had been postponed.
I took my refund and ran. So education, paramedics, phlebotomy, that's another three
setbacks, I think we're up to number eight by now. It's ironic but after
applying for a special late withdrawal from the Diploma of Education, I actually
got a teaching job here at Curtin. I started hanging out with one of my old
Human Biology lecturers, we were a small cohort, very close bunch and it felt like
our own little Human Biology family. Georgina took me under her wing and I
did a little bit of filing, helped her enter exam marks, just a few menial tasks
to keep my mind off the fact that I was feeling like a complete lost failure,
whose only achievement so far was a list of setbacks and a staff expert badge at
Pizza Hut. It was Georgina that listened to me
complain bitterly about how horrible I found the Education prac and it just
wasn't for me, and no way did I have the confidence to teach. It was also Georgina
who at this point suggested I might like to teach some first-year Human Biology
units here at Curtin instead. Yeah, because that would be better. Either she
was crazy or I was crazy or we were both crazy, but I did it and I loved it.
And I've taught these two Human Biology units 133, 134 or now known as HSF
and ISAP for about 15 years. Hindsight tells me that this was
probably my setback turning point. Don't get me wrong, there was still plenty of
setbacks to come, but I was finally heading in the right kind of direction.
My thirst to do nursing never really went away. Every semester I would have a bunch
of nursing students in my class and we'd often get a little distracted and talk
of their prac experiences. It made me want it so much more, but I just couldn't
get past that fear of blood and those horrible pesky needles. So how did I get
over my disgust of blood..? Well exactly 368 days after I got the biggest setback
of my life, being told I would never have children. I had a baby, I actually have four.
[Laughter]
I often tell...
[Applause]
I often tell my women when they give birth, that they also acquire superpowers,
because when I gave birth to a nine-pound butterball after 26 hours of labour,
a large episiotomy, vacuum extraction and a postpartum haemorrhage, I somehow knew
that if I could do that, I could do anything. So when my said butterball was
seven months old, I came back to Curtin and finally did my nursing degree.
I took a semester off halfway through, to have baby number two and graduated pregnant
with baby number three. And once I completed my post-grad in Midwifery,
he finally let me have baby number four. And no there will not be a baby number five,
or so I'm told. That is how I became a midwife.
Being a midwife is an awesome job, to be with a woman when she brings life into
this world, is such a privilege. To be with a woman when she brings stillness
into this world, is more than a privilege. It changes us, it hurts us, it challenges us.
This is not what any of us signed up for, nor is this how life should play out.
Starting 'A Midwife's Gift' has been the highlight of my career. I did not set out
to do this intentionally, it just happened because it needed to.
I consider myself very lucky to be doing what I'm doing and walking alongside
those that are on their journey of grief. In 2014, a beautiful boy, the most perfect
baby boy, was born at my hospital. He was full-term and his mum had had a very
uneventful textbook pregnancy. She woke up one morning with some blood loss and
by time she arrived at the hospital her baby had passed away.
Lincoln was perfect, ten fingers, ten toes, chubby cheeks, button nose, truly perfect.
Lincoln's short life inspired me to fundraise for a cold cuddle cot that I
wanted to purchase for my hospital. I emailed an Australian based foundation
who was aiming to provide a cot to every maternity hospital in Australia, stating
that I wanted to fundraise to purchase one cot, just one, for my hospital and
asked how I should go about doing this. It took me at least half an hour to
press the send button. I said to my husband, I've done something.
He looked at me with that "what now?" look that only he can give, and when I
explained that I was going to attempt to raise four thousand dollars for a cuddle
cot package, he rolled his eyes, questioned when I thought I would find
the time to do all this extra work, and then bowed in the knowledge that I would.
The foundation suggested I open a GoFundMe page and a Facebook page to
share my story and attract donations. She also told me I would have the money in
two weeks, so she would get the ball rolling on my order.
Panic set in at this point, how on earth would I make four thousand dollars
in two weeks? I needn't have worried, in just ten days my Facebook page,
A Midwife's Gift, had raised just over five thousand dollars. This in itself set my
mind racing and my husband's eyes rolling, again. Maybe just maybe I should
keep going and try for a second cot. In November 2014, I officially handed over
the cuddle cot to St John of God, Mount Lawley. To my absolute surprise and
delight the CEO presented me with a $4,000 check to pay it forward. My mind
was now made up, I contacted the Foundation again and said take WA off
your list, I've got it covered. Since September 2014, A Midwife's Gift has
raised just over a hundred and ten thousand dollars and twenty-one cots later,
we have almost ensured that every WA maternity hospital has a cuddle cot
available to anyone who experiences the tragic loss of their baby. I'm sure some
of you may be asking what...
[Clapping]
Some of you may be asking, what is a cuddle cot. The cuddle cot is a bassinet
with a mattress that has refrigerated water pumped into, allowing the
deceased baby to remain with its parents and not have to be taken to the morgue.
It gives the families the gift of time with their baby, time to hold, to love,
to cuddle, to grieve, to bathe, to make memories. Last October I won a Curtin
Alumni Achievement Award, and as honoured as I was to receive this, it highlighted
to me in my path of setbacks. Here I am being recognised by the very university
I had to beg to get into. After three degrees and teaching here for about 15 years,
it's good to know I've finally proved my worth to get that elusive uni offer.
I should leave you with some wise words of wisdom but clearly I'm way too young to
be wise. All I have for you is, don't give up. Curtin didn't want me, now they're
proud of me. Don't take no for an answer, I wasn't supposed to have kids, I have four.
Don't settle, you've always got more in you. Enjoy the process,
the good, the bad and the ugly. Do what ought to be done. Sometimes you
don't find the right path, but the right path will find you. And in case my kids
ever happen to watch this on YouTube, listen to your mum, she always knows best.
[Laughter]
I've lost track of the number of setbacks I've had, there's been a lot.
Small ones, significant ones, devastating ones, but at the end of the day, they were
all the right ones. If you do it right, failure is success, as long as you're
learning from each setback, you're on your way. Thank you for listening to my story,
congratulations to all of you tonight as you sigh that big sigh of
relief that you did it, you graduated. Good luck to you all as you enter your
next chapter and I wish you just the right amount of setbacks to put you on
your path to greatness.
[Applause]