hey welcome back for another episode of porn brain rewire the podcast with me Dr trishley
today we're going to talk about how to heal erectile dysfunction and delayed ejaculation
so we are talking about sexual dysfunction and how you can heal it we're going to talk about
unwire rewire and hardwire that's our familiar framework and we are going to think about it in
terms of stop desensitizing the reward center in your brain that's the unwired portion today the
rewire portion is how do you heal the reward center and the reward Pathways so that they
work again so we're going to cover how that desensitization happens and what it's doing
to you in terms of sexual function or dysfunction and then we're going to talk about how to heal it
lastly in the third section is going to be your brain hack strategies for the day in terms of
how do you hardwire your brain again for healthy sexual function after you've unwired and rewired
it how do you turn up the heat in the bedroom again after you have defrosted the situation in
the unwire and rewire so we've got a big awesome episode uh in store today so let us dig in Number
One Stop desensitizing the reward center in your brain to heal erecti dysfunction and delayed
ejaculation so if you struggle with erectile dysfunction this is an arousal dysfunction in
the brain the reason that it happens is you've been hitting the easy button for sexual arousal
at very high levels for a long time and for most people what that looks like Is frequent consistent
and building in intensity porn use coupled with masturbation to reach orgasm so in doing so what
you've done is you've conditioned your brain to go back to unhealthy sexuality to get high levels
of dopamine when you do that you're basically hitting the Easy Button literally on your phone
or computer to get a 15 plus level of dopamine well over time tolerance builds and you need to
hit a bigger button for higher intensity to get a 16 or a 17 or an 18 now we go back to time in
the bedroom with your honey and your honey on a good day is probably a nine right it's difficult
to be a nine all the time your honey on a good day probably a nine on a bad day when she's frustrated
with you maybe a two so now you're going back into the bedroom and you've got let's just call
it a five average you've got an average experience going on you're at a five but your brain is used
to a 15 so the arousal Gap that you need to close is 10 points literally in the amount of dopamine
that your brain needs to get aroused to be able to achieve an erection and be able to move yourself
towards orgasm in a timely enjoyable fashion this arousal Gap is because of dysfunction in the brain
because of hitting that easy button what has happened is the dopamine receptors D2 receptors
in your brain have been desensitized so moving on to number two because that's the unwire we're
going to move to rewire what do you do about it you have to resensitize the reward center in your
brain for many people it doesn't just come online by itself you have to work it out so if you want
to get fit yes you have to stop eating unhealthy right you have to stop consuming the stuff stuff
that is making you gain weight so our analogy here is you have to stop consuming porn sexual Media or
sexual acting out because that's desensitizing your brain that's making you gain the weight
in our weight loss analogy so you have to stop eating the bad stuff so for some people when they
stop eating the bad stuff they trim right down for other people they don't those people have to work
out so if you have you've stopped consuming porn but but your erectile dysfunction still around you
need the rewire process get into the qeg brain map with me so I can tell you exactly what you need
and if that's not in the cards for you at least SK Brain Training 101 so you can start training your
brain by yourself you need to rewire your brain most people need to you need to stop eating the
junk food and you need to start working out to be able to get a healthy body you have to stop
consuming porn and sexual media and you have to rewire your brain in the right direction
to get healthy erections and orgasm and healthy sexuality because you're changing your Baseline
back to healthy arousal let's go to number three right now the hard wire how to turn up the heat
after you've defrosted the bedroom so erectile dysfunction I'm talking about a cavalierly for
the sake of time mainly but I don't want to do that I want to pause here for a minute and tell
you that if you've been struggling with erectile dysfunction or delayed ejacul it is a struggle it
creates so much performance anxiety it creates the the polar opposite of healthy Baseline arousal it
makes it so that you're in a stressed out state anytime you think about being with your honey
which unfortunately throws you back into porn or hypersexuality and it all becomes a negative
feedback loop that keeps you stuck you have to stop desensitizing because you can't resensitize
while you're desensitizing and you have to rewire your brain so it works better but then you got to
start practicing healthy sexuality with your honey once you're no longer consuming supern
normal stimula what does that look like what that looks like is creating this is your brain hack for
today so I'm going to give you two brain hacks here's number one how to get your groove on with
your honey and how to start getting it going if it's been challenging for you for a while if it's
dead in the water number one is it's important to create time and space for physical intimacy
that if you want to start creating physical intimacy you have to be intentional about it
so you have to stop doing all the wrong stuff but you have to start doing some or all of the
right stuff and what that looks like is the easy way to start is time and space so create some
alone time if you can't get it in your own home find a way to go away for a night first what it
means is you have to become really aware of the Dr Jackal and Mr Hyde aspect of your porn influence
sexual behaviors so what that means is what is the highest arousal activities or behaviors in
the bedroom highest arousal might be those that are going to bring you back back or they're going
to spike dopamine at 15 because they're porn influenced so when it comes to that just start
building awareness and it should be give and take we should recognize that both Partners won't find
the exact same things arousing or exciting or enjoyable that's part of the process and that's
actually something that women desire based on science based on science women desire a man who
knows what he wants in a healthy way and a man who understands that she has otherness and she
might like other things and she might have her own arousal template and that's going to bring us to
the next aspect of this brain hack but recognizing that so in your actual physical interaction make
sure there's give and take make sure there's share make sure there's connection but it can still be
fun and engaging and have high levels of pleasure up to 10 if there's a problem or an issue in your
relationship which many times there is when porn consumption or hypersexuality or sexual acting
out is involved if there's any issue in your relationship recognize that's going to impact
your ability to feel that pleasure enjoyability and connection with your partner it has to be
addressed all of it should be addressed so the people who succeed in this journey the most are
those that are communicating and interacting with their partner in an emotionally healthy
way if you have a problem in your relationship you got to take all the opportunities and you're
going to need to create an opportunity right now to talk about the sexual dysfunction and what
your goal is what you want to happen and then get intentional and set your sight on that goal and
make it happen start working towards it and when you do you're going to find that combined with
brain training and the lack of desensitization your brain is going to resensitize itself and in
this safe comfortable environment with your honey it's going to come online if that environment is
not safe and comfortable it's going to put your brain into wired and tired wired especially so if
you're feeling anxious about performing it is the polar opposite brain pattern of com Focus
which is what is necessary to achieve erections in orgasm so that's the bottom line so you have
to hardwire your brain through your interactions with your partner and they will come online and
if you don't have a partner you want to attract a partner to you and practice building intimacy
over time polar opposite of the Easy Button now I'm going to give you brain hack number two very
quickly because I don't totally suggest this but if you don't have a partner or if you can't get
the conversation going with your partner but you want to start building arousal I have a technique
that I call master ation meditation it's loaded for anybody who's desensitized their brain so
it comes with a big red warning sign the warning sign is don't use this frequently because you are
not rewiring your brain back to healthy sexuality with a partner it's still sexuality with yourself
and that is not the way sexuality is designed sexuality is shared between two people so the
idea here is you stay with with the sensations in your body and you again build arousal over
time staying out of fantasy not using porn not using external 15 plus stimula trying to rewire
and reboot the system and to bring online arousal at a level seven8 or nine and thinking about your
partner or the potential partner is a way for you to also kind of stay with that healthy imagination
as one of the stimul so that you can attempt to kind of get that spark going but again I don't
really recommend it in this case I recommend that you focus on sexuality with your partner and if
you don't have a partner focus on attracting a partner because that's most people's goal get
out there and build Intimacy in the other ways by sharing emotionally and connecting and remember
that arousal base line of feeling calm and focused in your entire life is also necessary so if you're
really stressed out or if you're disengaged and you're not on purpose those things need
to be figured out in your life because that's what creates the healthy arousal Baseline all of that
is in the rewire section of my 90day program so if you are feeling particularly anxious and stressed
out your brain needs to be rewired more you got to go back to the rewire section before you can get
to this hardwire section and in the 90day program there is a tool boox of unwiring and rewiring your
brain the majority of that program is focused on the unwire and the rewire and there really is a
nice hardwire section for building the foundation also but get the help that you need because this
is just one suggestion out of a 100 okay I'm going to wrap it up if you need help in this
journey please visit me at Dr trc.com there are program in the porn brain rewire section there's
the digital 90day program you can add coaching with Coach Zack Carter you can get the brain
assessment with me under work with Dr Trish Lee which can lead to neuro feedback coaching
or you can train your brain by yourself I have a new erectile dysfunction program coming out soon
I'm very excited about it I've been working on it for months so I'll let you know when that's
available um it'll be on a top tab on my website so if it's not there yet it's coming soon and if
it is there go over there and you can check out that um program that digital program also
because it gives you all the tools of figuring out desensitization resensitization and Ready
set go in the bedroom through the five rewire RS for erectile dysfunction and there's a whole um
lesson on De and PE in that program also Okay so until next time I'm here for you I would love to
help you if you are struggling with erectile dysfunction this is no joke and you likely
need more help please go to my website and until next time control your brain or it'll control you