California's first responders have faced
some of the largest fires in the state's
history just in the last few years.
But things don't always go back to normal
when those fires are out.
It's really hard to actually deal with
what's in that mirror in front of you.
It was a PTSD monster.
And with the years and years of untreated
post-traumatic stress, it's—it's bound
to come out.
And it did.
Firefighters are living every day with
memories of these massive fires.
I saw the video that he took, where
he watched our home burn to the ground.
It's a really hard video to watch to this
day.
But I knew that that was really going to
alter things for him, and I was just...
My physical scars
pale in comparison to the amount of damage
that has happened in my head.
My hands are gonna heal. But my brain—it's
11 months out and it's still not healed.
Until recently, there was little data that
showed just how severely these traumas
were affecting firefighters.
But in 2017, more firefighters
were reported to have died by suicide than
in the line of duty.
There's a lot of divorce.
There's a lot of domestic violence,
depression, anxiety, isolation, those
things.
And then post-traumatic stress.
We can't show up for anybody else if we're
broken.
We never talked about that you gotta keep
yourself mentally in shape for the job.
Now, that's the message we're trying to
send out there, is that it goes hand in
hand. If the mind isn't right, the body
won't follow, so.
These veteran firefighters
are now working to reduce post-traumatic
stress in the fire department and the
stigma associated with mental health care.
This comes at a time when many California
residents have almost come to expect a
large wildfire to disrupt their lives
every year.
My blessing was being able to heal from
this trauma and help
other people heal from this trauma.
This Camp Fire was kind of like the straw
that broke the camel's back.
I didn't want to go to work.
I didn't—I love working for the fire
department, and I was dreading going
to work. And I could never say that about
my career ever.
Joe Chavez is a fire captain in Butte
County, California.
He was also a longtime Paradise resident,
until the Camp Fire destroyed his home.
The 2018 Camp Fire was the deadliest
fire in California history.
It burned through more than 150,000 acres
and killed 85 people.
At its height, it burned more than 100
acres of new ground per minute.
That's more than the equivalent of a whole
football field every second.
Everything was on fire. People were still
in their vehicle and
they were on fire.
They basically melted into the asphalt.
That was the intensity of this fire.
That was the traumatic experience
that a lot of people had
that day.
And after a day of responding to calls
as the Camp Fire swept through Paradise,
Joe was unable to keep the flames from
sparing his own home.
This is our house.
I watched my house burned down, basically.
Right around the six month or
so, I started to fall apart
a little bit. Drinking more, and
shorter fuse, and started doing
things that were unhealthy that were out
of characteristic for me.
The
turning point for me was Father's
Day, when we
were in the backyard. I was swimming with
my kids, and we were having a
good time, and the dog got too
close to my feet, and so I kicked it in
the pool.
And my kids freaked out, rightfully so,
that—that's their trauma.
I ruined my Father's Day.
Like, what are you doing as, as the father
and you kicking the dog in the pool?
And then I go to work the next week, and
my partner of 17 years says, hey,
you're off, man, you've been off for a
while. You—you're f*cked up.
You need some help.
That's when I looked in the mirror and I
called ESS—Shawna. And
I said, hey,
I'm ready, I need some help.
I don't know where to go.
She said, I think I know what we're gonna
do.
30, 40 years
ago, your experience in the fire service
was different
than what it is now. The exposure to not
only the amount of calls you went on, but
the type of calls we're going on now.
People are going to, you know, at some
stations, 20 calls a day.
So the exposure's just that much more.
Shawna is a battalion chief in Cal Fire's
Employee Support Services program, or
ESS.
ESS makes peer support available during
incidents such as the Camp Fire.
After the fire is contained, ESS will
connect employees with the appropriate
people to talk to, if they need it.
[phone ringing] Hi, this Shawna.
Hey, Shawna, um, I was told to call you
referring a retreat.
Ok, can I call you back in about, uh,
10 minutes or so?
And I'll fill you in on all that?
Yeah.
Shawna is one of just 7 ESS team members.
This means every day, Shawna gets dozens
of calls from people in fire service from
all over the state of California.
We're like a broker for
finding the resources, the right resources
or the right tools for the person
who's calling.
Depending on what they're calling about
and what they need, those tools are gonna
look different.
So if you're finding the tools, then—then
you're gonna be better off.
Joe is definitely not the only person that
this has happened to.
On November 8, we got dispatched to the
Camp Fire.
We got up there.
We did some work.
I ended up getting burned, uh,
while I was with my crew.
And then I got flown to UC Davis and spent
three weeks in the burn unit.
It was the really major parts—it was my
hands and my face that got burned, which
are critical.
I went through a very traumatic event,
and I think some days
I forget that—of how
traumatic it was and that the brain
locks stuff in and you can't access
it right away.
We really praise guys
in the fire service that are calm and
clear no matter what's going on.
For us to then turn around
and ask for help
is really hard.
I think when you see those guys that get
help, and they
get better, and their marriage lasts, and
all that stuff, it's really empowering.
I know it was devastating to my wife
because she always wonders, is she gonna
get her husband back?
You know, am I ever going to go back to where I
was before? And who knows?
Who knows where that answer lies?
I'm just trying to make the best with what
I have right now.
You know, the common saying is, well, you
got out safe and everyone got out safe.
Absolutely. That's the #1 thing.
But also, there's something to be said
about the things that you did lose,
that you have to mourn. You have to take
time to mourn your wedding album and
all your children's pictures.
I don't care about the couches, and all
the other stuff, and the other crap, but
it's the sentimental stuff that hurts.
A large part of what ESS does is connect
firefighters with culturally competent
clinicians who have a deep understanding
of trauma and of firefighter culture.
Joe went to a retreat in Colorado for
first responders.
There, he participated in what he called a
boot camp for all the trauma that had
built up.
I didn't laugh after the fire for a long,
long time.
I cried. I had anger.
Until I went to the retreat, until
I was able to find
happiness again.
It was pretty shocking.
It was—he was dramatically changed.
For the good.
When he came home, it was like nothing
could really upset him or bother him, and
there was a lot of joy in that.
My son, I told him I went to a training,
a fire department training for a week in
Colorado, because that's what it
was. He said, well, what
kind of training was it? Was it anger
management training?
Because I came back a happy person.
There was no more anger.
Joe, along with his family, benefited
greatly after he opened up to counselors.
And this is the ultimate goal of ESS.
Mike Ming, the deputy chief of ESS,
has expanded his program.
Now his team has the opportunity to reach
out to even more individuals and get them
the support they need.
It's extremely important for the
individual to understand how
the traumatic environment
impacts us so it doesn't bleed over
into family. Before, you were seen as
weak, like, oh, you can't handle this job.
Maybe you should get another one.
That's not correct.
What is correct is that we're all human
beings, and we're doing our civil duty.
It's ok to be human
still and ask for the help.
And ESS is there to help.
And it's been a long journey, a
lot of work, but we do need to model
for all of our folks.
Today, fire captains such as Joe have
taken on peer support duties in addition
to their full-time responsibilities.
This is to ensure their colleagues are
equipped to face the state's wildfires,
especially as fire seasons get longer and
the fires get more intense.
Yeah, we're comin', honey.
We're comin', love.
Let's get some of this—fresh salsa that
you just opened up.
Mm-hmm.
Ok, who's gonna bless our food tonight? Our 12-year-old? Do you want me to? Ok.
The Camp Fire will
always leave a burnt
hole in my heart because
of the loss of community, because
of the loss of the life
that we previously had.
That will never go away.
Lord, thank you for this day.
Thank you for bringing friends to come and
be with our family, and we ask that, um, they remain safe and that you be with them.
Thank you for this meal and our time
together, and help us have a good evening. And thank you for this food, in Jesus'
name.
Amen.
Everybody has some type of hurt.
Everybody has some type of trauma, um,
whether they want to deal with it
or not. It's really hard sometimes
to get through that shell, and I'm here to
say: Break through the shell because
once you do, there's beautiful things
waiting for you.
You know, it's—there's a beautiful,
beautiful life out there.
You just have to go get it.