have you heard the argument that bad words or bad language isn't that bad that it doesn't
matter maybe even your children have said that bad words don't really mean anything
so they ask what's the big deal and what can you do to teach them not to use bad language in this
episode i'm going to give you the reasons bad words are bad and if you watch to the end you
will have a step-by-step plan of exactly how to teach your children not to use them
be sure to watch to the end because i'm also going to explain how to help you not only teach
your child not to say bad words but also to speak respectfully to their siblings coming right up
goes by it's getting worse and worse in our society a few years ago you would never hear
a person use foul language in public except on very rare occasions you wouldn't go into a store
and hear someone spouting off profanities while in a conversation now you can hardly help hearing it
some of you may already realize this is a problem but others may not really see it as an issue
why is this a problem anyway the reason it is a problem is because it is rude now i know that
isn't a good enough answer because then the question becomes why is it rude here's why
manners are all about making others feel comfortable and not intruding upon someone
else's mind and body inappropriately rudeness is the opposite of that manners
and rudeness are opposites when someone uses foul language what they are doing is intruding upon the
mind of another person by placing vulgar thoughts in their mind without any invitation to do so
i mean we can hardly help but hear it when someone else says it in our presence right
and when we hear it it is put in our mind whether we want it to be there or not now let me give you
an analogy that may make this point a little more clear think of the most foul word you can think of
for a moment and i'm sorry to ask you to do that but just think of it for just a moment what's the
meaning of that word now instead of thinking of that word think of a picture of the meaning
of the word i'm not talking about the spelling of it on a piece of paper but a picture of the
actual thing or act it is describing now imagine that someone has that picture and they're holding
it in their hand and they just randomly hold it up in front of you as they're in a conversation
with you they flash that picture in front of you without any provocation or invitation to do so
now you're not a blind person so you can't help but see it wouldn't that be inappropriate wouldn't
that be rude and if your child was standing right there wouldn't you want to cover their eyes
yes of course you would and yes it is rude it is rude because it is intruding upon your mind
and the mind of your child as well many of the words that are considered inappropriate are words
degrading the act of sex or human waste and some are degrading for other reasons now think about
being in a conversation with someone and all of a sudden a word degrading sex or speaking about
human excrement is placed in the conversation and that be considered rude yes now i think some of
you that are watching knew there was something wrong with bad language but weren't sure what
you may now have a clear understanding in your mind about why bad language is bad here's a few
things you can do to teach your children not to use bad words this list can also be used to
help curb the problems with siblings arguing as well so this is a two-for-one lesson here
number one have a conversation sit down with your child and explain the reason why bad words are bad
as i have just explained it here also tell them that words mean things and when words come out of
their mouth they cannot be put back in number two give them guidelines for their own speech
each word they speak is putting a thought into the mind of the listener including their siblings in
order not to be rude the words they use should be at least one of four things helpful informative
uplifting or encouraging if they are not in at least one of these categories
they should not be said at all remember those four things helpful informative uplifting encouraging
you'll need to keep those in mind for what's coming up number three give them a memory verse
one thing i am so glad i did when i was bringing up my children was teach them this short scripture
now whether you're a christian or not i suggest you consider teaching it to your children it goes
like this let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth but that which is good to the
use of edifying that it may minister grace and to the hearers i remember even my little
three-year-olds could say this verse and it was so cute hearing them use these big words believe me
this verse is a great one to help children learn to speak appropriately and if you put
it on their parent recording they can learn it without much prompting and reminding from you
if you don't know what a parent recording is see the video on this channel about no fuss bedtime
for kids and get it or get a copy of my book how to train your child to behave number four ask them
questions when they speak inappropriately if you hear a child speak a bad word or even a mean or
unkind word to their siblings you can ask them these four questions right in a row in the same
order every time and have them answer each one as you ask it was this helpful was it informative
was it uplifting was it encouraging once they answer no to all of these questions remind them
that they should not have said it at all number five have them say the memory reversed back to you
after these questions have them repeat the memory verse from ephesians i just told you about
we didn't have that language in our home at all but i used this method to talk to my own children
if i would hear them speaking unkindly to each other arguing or saying anything else that was
inappropriate it worked well and i believe most of them could still repeat this verse as adults
number six have them write an essay
if you do still have a problem with your child speaking inappropriately
another great way to help them think through their own behavior is to have them write an
essay as to why this kind of language isn't acceptable tell them to write it well and give
them requirements per their age for the length and other details you'd expect to be included in it
then keep the essay and each time it happens have them read the essay back to you aloud believe me
with all of this if it is done consistently it is unlikely that they will get this far but if
they do having to read the essay aloud to you each time will definitely stop the behavior
has this video given you some helpful parenting advice if so please remember to subscribe to this
channel and check out my book how to train your child to behave there's a link below or you can
find me at mommyanswerlady.com parents you can do this i hope to see you here next week