- Oh my goodness we have company.
Just so embarrassed to be seen in this old thing.
- Don't worry Blanche, the dress covers most of it.
- We have spent exactly two Saturday mornings
building display booths and painting signs,
we're hardly close.
- Maybe you could be if you'd ask him out,
he's obviously too shy to ask you.
- Maybe he just doesn't like her?
- Thank you Rose, incidentally, you look fat.
- Dorothy, have you ever heard
of something called Dirty Dancing?
- Well of course, Blanche, they did it in that movie.
- What movie?
- Lawrence of Arabia, Rose.
- This flyer that came in the mail says
they're gonna start a dirty dancing course
down at Lawson's Dance Studio.
What do you say Dorothy?
- Oh no, I can't see myself swinging my hips
and wildly gyrating my pelvis, I am not interested.
- And the world heaves a collective sigh of relief.
- Oh Dorothy, good god, you were cleaning out the garage
and you asked Sofia to move a sofa?
- Don't start with me.
- I mean she is 84 years old.
And you're asking her to do the work of two men.
- Blanche leave her alone, I'm sure she feels bad enough.
- Thank you Rose.
Oh honey, do we have any orange juice?
- Sure, would you like me to pour you a glass,
or have Sofia come in and bring the the refrigerator?
- Russell, hi, what are y'all doing here?
- Russell and I just entered the dance marathon.
- Really, so did I.
- Yes, it's for charity, I thought it would be fun.
- Uh-huh, well,
have yourself a good time and try not to overdo it.
- Blanche,
what is that supposed to mean?
- Oh nothing, it's just that these things can be
a little strenuous for a woman of your years.
- Who am I, Mamie Eisenhower?
I can last just as long as you can.
- (laughs) Oh Dorothy please,
I think I do have a little more endurance than you.
- Blanche we are not dancing on our backs.
- You take that back.
- I will not.
You just implied that I'm an old lady.
- Oh well honey, I didn't mean to imply it
I meant to say it flat out.
- Oh Rose, Rose, what are you doing?
- Oh she can't face me, she's been doing this all day.
Rose, you know, I said I'm sorry,
can't you put yourself in my position?
- Apparently, I'm not limber enough.
- That was good.
- Wow, what a hunk.
- I know, eat your hearts out.
- Blanche, did it ever occur to you that possibly Rose
or I might be interested in Jake?
- Yes.
- And you still used every cheap ploy to nab him
before we had a chance?
- Yes.
- Then what do you have to say for yourself?
- Damn, I'm good.
- I wish men would have breasts, just for one day,
then they'd know what it's like to be judged
by some physical trait.
I mean, just because I'm built like this
you wouldn't believe how many people think I'm dumb.
- Rose, you're too hard on yourself,
I know people who think you're dumb over the phone.
- Okay girls, which goes better,
the silver chain or the pearls?
- The chain.
- An amateur's mistake, can't you see that the chain
accentuates the many folds of that turkey like neck?
- well that may be, but the pearls draw attention
to the non existent bosom.
- Yes, but, the chain leads the eye even lower
to that huge spare tire,
jutting out over those square, manly hips.
- Why don't I just wear a sign that says,
too ugly to live?
- Fine, but what are you gonna hang it from
the chain or the pearls?
- Neither, I'm going to spray paint it on my hump.
Well, I'm off.
If you need something to keep you occupied tonight, Rose,
why don't you take out a good book
and see if you can find Waldo.
(laughs)
- I've never liked her.