-My next guest is an Emmy-nominated writer
and comedian you know for his work
on "Saturday Night Live" and "Los Espookys."
He wrote, directed, and stars
in the film "Problemista," which is in select theaters now
and opens everywhere March 22nd. Let's take a look.
-Hello. Hi. Uh, my name is Alejandro.
I am originally from El Salvador,
but I live in New York now.
Um, and I have a lot of ideas for toys.
Toys these days are wonderful,
but they are a little bit too preoccupied
with, um...
uh, fun.
Um, I have a few ideas for toys
that include a doll that is kind of like a Barbie,
except she has her little fingers crossed behind her back.
This, I believe, will add much tension and intrigue
to any dreamhouse. Life can't be all parties.
And my personal favorite --
smartphones for Cabbage Patch dolls
displaying their uniquely complicated lives.
Like Marjorie, for instance.
She should have a little picture of a spot inside of her mouth
when she's texting to a friend because she's worried
that it might be something -- something bad.
-Please welcome back to the show
our friend Julio Torres, everybody!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪
Welcome back, my friend. -Hello, friend.
-It's been almost a couple years.
I'm so happy to have you here.
-I -- Were you --
When did you stop wearing suits?
[ Laughter ]
-Pandemic. -Pandemic.
Okay, I prefer this. -Oh, you do?
-Yeah. -That's good to know
because you have a great visual style,
so I would've taken it very hard if you were like...
-If you're like, "You should go back to the suits."
-I also kind of --
-This is a serious business, Seth.
-I also know you to be an honest person,
so I think if you did think suits,
you would've just said it.
You wouldn't have --
You would've been happy to tell me
if you thought this was worse.
-I'm a very honest person,
but you would have to ask for it.
-Okay. Gotcha. -Yeah.
-But do you think you would've teed it up?
You would've come out and been like, "How long...?"
and I would've said, "Oh, a couple years."
-And it's like, "What happened around that time?"
[ Laughter ] -Yeah.
-"Can we heal?" [ Laughter ]
-Well, that's very nice of you to say.
And congratulations.
I was introduced to your work as a wonderful writer on "SNL,"
and then you made the terrific show "Los Espookys,"
and now you wrote, directed, and star in your own feature.
Tilda Swinton... -Yeah.
-...is in your movie. -Yes.
-And Tilda Swinton is... -Heard of her?
-...one of the greatest, uh, living actors, I would say.
-Mm-hmm. -How did it -- what was it like
when Tilda Swinton basically said, "Yeah, I'm game"?
-It felt right.
It felt like, "Oh, of course, yes."
Uh, no, no, but the thing about her is that,
even though she's a -- I mean, this word
is overused now, but iconic. -Yeah.
Even though she is iconic and -- and a legend,
she's also so funny and warm and sweet, and I first --
It was so immediately nice.
And it, uh -- one of my favorite moments was,
she was trying on her wardrobe for the movie,
and then she put on her coat backwards.
And then she goes -- "Or maybe she wears it backwards!"
[ Laughter ]
And then I was like, "Oh, you're a friend."
Yeah. [ Laughter ]
"You're a friend." -You play someone
who takes a job with her as an assistant.
-Yeah.
-She plays a very difficult person.
And is that where the term, the title of the movie,
"Problemista," came from? Like, how did you come up
with this as a title? -Well, the title of the movie
"Problemista" came from me
suggesting a lot of titles that no one else liked.
Uh... [ Laughter ]
Um, I liked the title "Problemista,"
but, at one point, the movie was called "13 Eggs."
-"13 Eggs"? -"13 Eggs."
Okay. When you -- -Yes.
In the context, it makes sense.
Uh, but I guess they were worried
about that reaction from audiences.
[ Laughter ]
"13 Eggs"?
[ Laughter ]
Uh...
I-I-I thought -- I thought it was great,
but, uh, um, I also wanted to call it "My Little Problems."
-Yeah. That's not a bad title. -Oh.
-Okay, I heard an, "Oh." Is that a good "oh"
or a bad "oh"? Like...
-It does -- I mean, I will say
"My Little Problems" does feel like it
maybe in that world of "My Secret Little Lies"
or "Big Little Problem" -- you know what I mean?
Like, I feel like -- -Oh, it's in the
"Pretty Little Liars," "Big Little Secrets"...
-I think -- I might think there's a murder.
-Yeah, a murder and heels. [ Laughter ]
Yeah. -Uh, um...
And then Bowen, our friend Bowen suggested
calling it "My First Movie."
[ Laughter ]
Which I -- I considered it.
I was just like, "Oh, imagine, like, 'My First Mo--'"
In cursive, "My First Movie."
[ Laughter ]
And then my second movie would be "My Second Movie."
-Oh, yeah. [ Laughter ]
Yeah. Just be honest about what people are getting.
-Yeah. And it's mine. -This is --
So you start working for Tilda to get a work visa,
to get sponsored for a work visa?
-Yeah, for her character. -This is very --
This is autobiographical.
And you had to -- It's a very honest take
on the sort of jobs people will take on
early in their time in New York City,
especially if they need it for a work visa.
What were some of the early jobs
that you were lucky enough to -- or unlucky enough to have?
-So, they were all through Craigslist.
-Um -- -I should note Craigslist
is a character in the movie.
-Craigslist is a character.
-Yeah. You have an actor who plays Craigslist?
-Yes, yes, I have an actor.
-It's very on brand for everything I love about you.
-Yeah. Uh, the -- My dear, wonderful friend
Larry Owens plays Craigslist,
and Larry plays Craigslist like...
with a -- with, like, Ursula
from "The Little Mermaid" sensuality.
-Yeah. -It's very like -- like,
"Oh, this is bad, but I want to be here."
It's, uh --
"Craigslist wants something from you,
but can give you so much." Like, that's the --
-So, did you -- And was that your initial
take on Craigslist when you first encountered it,
that it was a sensual being?
-Well, there was -- there was a melody to the ads
where it was like, uh, "Ikea build a bookcase."
Uh, very, uh, "Help wanted immediately."
"Need help, need help!"
Uh, that was very, uh, very seductive.
But, no, I did -- I did --
I did so many jobs, but one, uh --
one ad that I replied to said,
"Looking for magician's assistant."
-Okay. -And immediately, like, I saw --
I envisioned a new life for myself as --
And I was just so in love with the idea
that I would be a magician's assistant.
Um, reinventing it and, like, breaking,
like, gender norms, et cetera, being a magician's assistant.
And I show up to the interview,
and the first thing he says is,
"I am not magician."
[ Audience exclaims ]
Uh, which -- And -- And I was like, "Okay."
And he said, "I am musician."
And I'm like, "Typo. Okay, sure."
Uh, and then his whole thing
was that he he was like, "I have a sax--"
He had his saxophone case next to him.
Was like, "I have a saxophone,
and I'm looking for someone to book me for parties,
and I play the saxophone,
and people are having fun at the party,
and then, all of a sudden, [bleep] comes out."
[ Laughter ]
And then I'm like, "What do you --
What do you mean '[bleep] comes out'?"
[ Laughter ]
Uh, so apparently, from within the hole of the saxophone,
there was a dildo... [ Laughter ]
...that would come out, and he goes, like,
"And from the [bleep] vodka, tequila..."
And, uh -- And, like --
And it's just like, "Oh, it's a great time.
Like, people are like -- like pouring drinks."
And I'm like, "Okay. This seems like a --
like a -- maybe like a bachelorette-party situation."
But then he was like, "I need you to book me for gigs,
but the people booking me cannot know..."
[ Laughter ]
"...that there is a dildo in the saxophone
or else it'll break the illusion."
[ Laughter ]
-I mean, I got to say,
because the hardest job in the world
is just booking a saxophone guy for a party."
-Yeah. -So now you got
to get over that hurdle. -And then you get all nervous --
"I hope they like the dildo!" [ Laughter ]
"I really hope they like the dildo!"
That's a Venn diagram
that I feel like almost has no overlap.
People -- People who want a saxophone at a party...
-Yeah. -...but they also don't mind
if there's a surprise [bleep] that serves cocktails.
-Yeah, yeah. -Yeah.
-So that was maybe -- maybe you turn that one down.
-Not turn it down. I wanted it so badly,
but he didn't hire me. -Really?
-No. -So the issue in the end
was he didn't think you were up for the job.
-No, it's New York, it's New York.
Like, everyone's dying to have any job.
-Right. -So, like, behind me,
there was a line of like 30 people
desperately wanting this job. [ Laughter ]
-Who had experience. They're like,
"I did a -- I worked on a [bleep] piano."
-Yeah. [ Laughter ]
"So I loved -- I feel like it's close enough."
-So, how are you supposed to get experience
managing a dildo saxophone if no one gives you the job?
-That's the thing, right?
Like, I feel like you only get in if you know somebody.
[ Laughter ]
Um, we talked about toys -- or, the clip was --
You know, this is a film where you want to be a toy designer.
-Yes. Yeah -In the film.
And you posted this. This is, um, Krisha?
-Yeah. So -- Okay, so I heard one clap in the audience,
which makes me very happy, which means that there is
one diehard Julio fan in the audience.
[ Laughter ]
So, Krisha and I have known each other for a while.
-Okay. Krisha is a McNugget?
-She has -- She's estranged from her family, but yes.
-Okay. -She is, uh --
she's a McNugget.
I met her many years ago, and she was in the movie,
but I had to cut her... -Oh, God.
-...out of the movie because she was mic'd,
and she was just like --
She's, like, weirdly Christian in, like, really scary ways.
-Okay. [ Laughter ]
And just like the things that she was saying,
uh, it's like, "I don't care what they do at home,
but why do they do it here?" -Oh, God.
-You know what I mean? -On a movie set.
-Yeah, and on a movie set.
And I'm like, "Well, you know, I'm queer, Krisha."
And it's just like a whole thing.
But, um, you know, we -- we love our --
our chaotic conservative queens, I guess.
-Yeah. [ Laughter ]
This is, uh --
And I know I got her name wrong last time.
-Yeah.
-Is she still running your social media?
-Yeah.
-Pirulinpinpina. -Pirulinpinpina.
She's my social-media manager.
-This is your social-media manager, Pirulinpinpina.
[ Laughter ] And you seem a little --
I hope you don't mind me saying this.
You seem a little exhausted with Pirulinpinpina.
-Well, it's not the typos so much as the, uh --
the waking me up in the middle of the night, being like,
"It's time to post." -Oh, yeah, yeah.
And it's like, "Again, hon, New York time."
[ Laughter ]
-Why do you keep her around? I mean, you're working so hard.
I feel like you need people who make your life easier,
not harder.
-That's what my therapist says. Uh...
[ Laughter ]
But I don't know. I -- I -- I...
Once I meet someone, they're with me forever.
-Well, you're a good, loyal person.
-I'm a good, loyal person. Yeah.
-Congratulations on the movie. It's fantastic.
It's so great having you back.
Julio Torres, everyone.
"Problemista" is playing in select theaters.
It opens everywhere March 22nd.
We'll be right back with more "Late Night."