- Hey everybody, happy Wednesday.
That means I'm on the website, KatiMorton.com,
and also on YouTube, answering your questions.
So, if you asked a question below yesterday's video
or on my website, you go to the homepage, KatiMorton.com,
and then you go to Kati's Videos,
and under it it says Q&A Suggestions, I think,
or FAQ Suggestions.
If you ask your questions there on Wednesday, I find them.
I'm gonna rest my arm here.
I am at my mom's in Washington State,
so I don't have all of my gear
like I normally do for my vlogging,
so sorry it's a little warbly.
But without further ado,
I have my questions for today,
as well as a journal topic at the end, okay?
So stay tuned.
First question, "#KatiFAQ, what do you do
"if you feel like your problems aren't big enough
"to see a therapist, or that because it's
"only once in a while, it's not a real problem.
"I cut, but sometimes go weeks in between cuts,
"while other times I do it daily,
"and I have suicidal thoughts,
"but only a few times a month.
"I feel like I should be able to
"handle things on my own,
"but I also feel like I might have depression,
"and I'm struggling.
"I'm scared to ask my therapist what she thinks
"because I don't want to annoy her.
"That was one of the issues
"I went to therapy for in the first place.
"I feel like I'm annoying everyone.
"Thanks for reading."
Now, I get questions like this a lot about,
"I should be able to handle this,
"I shouldn't have to see someone,
"I should be able to just manage this,
"and I shouldn't have to feel bad,
"or I should get over this,
"or I should, should, should, should, should."
And one of the things I always say to my clients
is you're shoulding all over yourselves.
And we are.
And I find that I even do that myself sometimes.
Well, I should be doing this,
and I should be able to buy a house,
and I should be here, and I should be.
Stop shoulding.
And as you notice yourself saying,
"I should be able to handle this on my own, I should,"
think "I'm gonna stop, I'm doing the best I can,
"and if I need a little extra support, that's okay."
Now, it sounds like you worry that you
maybe don't even need to see a therapist,
but I would argue to say that everybody does.
I see a therapist.
For those of you that are new to my channel,
I don't know, maybe you haven't catched up,
caught up on my old videos.
Catched up, what's wrong with me?
I'm on vacation, my brain is tired all the time.
I'm just lazy today.
And it's really hot here.
I laid out in the sun and I'm like, hoo!
So, anyway, if you haven't caught up on my videos,
I go to therapy myself, and it's not for
any particular thing, it's just nice to
get some perspective sometimes
from someone who's not involved in your life day-to-day,
like a friend, or a family member, or something like that.
It's nice to get an outside perspective.
So I say yes, your problems are big enough,
yes you do need support, yes it's okay to ask,
and no, you're never gonna annoy your therapist, trust me.
As a therapist and as someone who has a therapist,
I've never had her tell me she's annoyed,
I've never had her act annoyed,
and I've never had a client annoy me, okay?
So just trust me, you're worth it.
Now, question number two: "#KatiFAQ,
"Hey Kati, I hope you're having
" a great time in Washington."
I am, thank you.
"So, my question is, if you don't tell your therapist
"everything that's going on, or you tell them
"all about one of your issues, like anxiety,
"but not your self-harm struggles,
"is this a good way to sort out one issue,
"and then you could pick up other at a later date,
"or should all come out right away?"
Now, in my experience, everything is linked.
All of our problems are linked to another thing,
and finding the core problem,
like is it your anxiety that's the core problem?
Is it abuse that you suffered in the past the core problem?
Is it the lack of the ability to
express how you really feel the core problem?
That's what we need to get to.
So whether you have to tell all the problems at once,
chances are they're gonna come out anyways.
I personally dump everything with my therapist,
"And I was feeling this way, and blah, blah, blah,
"and then this happened when I was little,
"and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah!"
And so, I find it most helpful,
because it gets us to the core problem faster.
But like I always say, do it at your own pace,
whatever you're comfortable with.
If you don't wanna tell her everything all at once,
then take your time with it, okay?
So, yeah, and if any of you have experience with that,
or have dumped it all at once,
or dumped it over a period of time,
let us know what you think, okay?
Oh, it looks like Larry's home.
My mom's boyfriend Larry is getting home.
Okay, now this last question.
"Hey Kati, for about a year now,
"I've been struggling with depression,
"anxiety, panic, self-harm, and self-hate.
"My parents think everything is getting better,
"but in reality it's getting so much worse.
"I don't know if I can ever get better,
"and I'm just beginning to wonder if
"it would all just be easier to end it all.
"I know my thoughts have reached a pretty serious level,
"but I'm scared to tell anyone.
"Should I tell anyone?
"If so, how?
"Thanks.
"By the way, I love your videos."
Now, if any of you are out there and you're thinking,
"I'm gonna end my life, it's not worth it,"
please, please, please call Suicide Hotline.
On my website, I have a whole page dedicated to this,
so if you are in the States,
if you're in other countries, if you're wherever,
we have a bunch of information.
Please reach out.
Now, also, my website isn't a suicide prevention.
Like, if you're in the chat,
it's not up to the people on there
to help you through this.
Please call a professional.
That's what suicide hotlines are for,
and please tell someone.
If you think about it a lot,
and you have a plan, or you, just,
if it's on your mind, honestly,
any more than just once in a blue moon,
please tell someone about it,
because it's serious, and you deserve
to get the help you need,
and you deserve to feel better.
Now, the last thing is my journal topic.
And this is just a question,
because I think it's good for us
to evaluate people that are in our lives,
and why we choose to have
certain people in our lives.
And the question is, "What qualities
"do you most value in friends?"
And I think it's good to kinda think about,
because oftentimes, we have toxic people in our lives,
I have a video, I'm gonna set my phone down over here,
I have a video from a long, long, long time ago,
where I talk about toxic friends and toxic people,
and how they're kinda like emotional vampires
and they just suck all the life right out of us.
And so, maybe take some time to kind of think about
what are the qualities that I look for
and value most in my friends,
or in friends in general,
and then how do we find those people
and put them into our lives,
or weed out the icky ones?
And maybe click through to my toxic friends
or toxic people video from a long time ago
to get some more insight on this.
I love you all.
Tomorrow I will be on Twitter, Twitter.
Thursday Twitter.
Sorry, I'm like, wait, what day is it?
What's happening?
'Cause I'm on vacation, right?
So I'll see you tomorrow.
Ask your questions using the hashtag #KatiFAQ,
and I'll get to them, bye!