- So we've all dealt with ups and downs.
And you posted this letter that you wrote to yourself
a while ago, giving yourself life advice.
I love this.
Where were you in life when you wrote this?
Like, were you hugely successful already?
Where you, like, what was happening?
- I think I was, I was working.
I was like, boy, my penmanship's
the nuns would be furious.
I was working. But I think, you know,
it's like at every stage you're always like,
what am I doing? What am you always kind of,
I think through my 30's, I was still like,
what am I doing?
Like you always, I think your expectations are unrealistic
and it's not until you kind of get past that,
that you look back and you go, oh, that was okay.
That was a good, like,
- [Kelly Clarkson] Yeah.
- I was fine then I just didn't know it yet.
So I was like, I want to stop doing that thing
of realizing 5 years after the fact
that I was really doing okay.
And I should have just appreciated the moment.
So I kind of wrote this to be like,
I want to look at myself now
and go through all of those moments
and just be like, we're so hard on ourselves.
I think,
- Oh my gosh, yeah.
- Just across the board and it's like,
it's okay to just be like, it's pretty good.
- [Kelly Clarkson] Yeah.
- It's pretty good.
- [Kelly Clarkson] Yeah. I agree. I agree.
Well, I love your advice yourself.
Would you talk us through some of these wise words?
I love this one first in 10 years,
you will not remember his name.
(laughing)
(audience clapping)
I love that!
- It's true
- Cause it is, it seems so huge in the moment.
- I know that I was thinking about
just when you think that's it, that's it, that's the one.
And I'm like, and I was trying to go back and I was like,
okay, let's make a list of all these ones
because I've gotten the one, now I know I got,
I got the one and I started to try to make a list.
And I was like, I know we wore combat boots.
And I started being like, oh my God,
I can't even remember his name.
I can't remember. Like, and I was like, you didn't,
you didn't stop my progression,
but I was so devastated or so I thought, cause I think I'd,
- [Kelly Clarkson] Yeah.
- I don't even know if I liked it. I mean,
I liked people plenty,
but I think it was more about putting the pressure on myself
to be like,
everyone had to be the one or the job had to be the thing.
And I'm like, what if it's just
- [Kelly Clarkson] The next step.
- It's a step because I can't remember that guy's name
- [Kelly Clarkson] Yeah.
- to save my life. And then I just had.
- Or your just like, why did I date that person?
- Yeah.
- How lonely was I?
- What would I have told my friend,
if they would have like been out with this guy
- Yeah exactly.
- This guy?
- [Kelly Clarkson] Yeah.
- Instead I was like, well,
(laughing)
I wasn't like, I wasn't like a,
a wimpy person. I think it's just part of,
- [Kelly Clarkson] Yeah.
- kind of coming into yourself.
- I think, can you be a strong people though?
Like, especially if you're so strong
in your passionate person,
you're a hundred percent into something. So I get like,
yeah. Okay.
So you also wrote, "Just eat the damn cookie".
(laughing)
Hi. Hey, I will tell you.
Recently I've stolen Jesse and Jason's diet.
They call it the joy diet. It's whatever brings you joy.
(laughing)
- I like that one
(clapping)
I like that one
- [Kelly Clarkson] It's like Marie Kondo, but with food.
Cause you find yourself, honestly,
you find yourself going well, do I really want it?
Like, and sometimes you don't,
but like when you really do you do it,
- I just think.
- Yeah, like what does the cookie represent? Exactly.
- There's many cookies.
- Exactly.
- There's many cookies.
It's also just about like,
I'm not going to make myself feel bad anymore.
- [Kelly Clarkson] Yeah.
- I'm goona eat the damn pasta.
It's not even about the eating.
It's just like,
do what do the thing that you love because you love it.
If it's not hurting you or hurting anybody else,
- Yeah
- Some imaginary standard. I'm like,
if I don't eat the cookie, I'm not going to wake up
six-two and modeling.
(laughing)
It's not gonna change, I'm like, I'm okay where I am.
I'm not like, oh God, my legs are fine. I have water.
It's like all the denying and like do so much of like a
shouldn't. I just don't do it.
Don't do limit your coffee.
Maybe it should switch from all milk, blah, blah, blah,
all that stuff. Now I'm just like, I'm going to,
if it's not detrimental to me or anyone else,
I'm just going to, I'm going to have the damn cookie,
- [Kelly Clarkson] You know what? we're going to end there.
(laughing)