GREG GUTFELD TAKES IT NOW.
♪ ♪
>> Greg: THAT’S TRUE.
IT’S TRUE.
ALL RIGHT.
YES, HAPPY WEDNESDAY.
HAPPY WEDNESDAY, EVERYONE.
GREAT SHOW.
I’M SO EXCITED.
JARED KUSHNER HAS JOINED US.
IF YOU LOOK CLOSELY, YOU CAN SEE
THE REGRET STARTING TO TAKE
SHAPE ON HIS FACE.
AND FOR SOME REASON WE WELCOME
BACK MIKE BAKER.
LET’S HOPE HE CAN COMPLETE A
SENTENCE USING ONLY 50 UMS IN 24
GROANS.
WHEN YOU NEED A COHERENT THOUGHT
AND 24 HOURS, DON’T CALL HIM.
ALL RIGHT.
EVER SINCE JOE BIDEN’S SPEECH
FROM THE INNERMOST CIRCLE OF
HELL, I’VE BEEN THINK ABOUT THE
FUTURE OF THIS COUNTRY.
NOT THAT HE ATE FIBER BEFORE
BOARDING THE ROLLER COASTER AT
SIX FLAGS.
IT’S THE EXTREME MAGA REPUBLICAN
WHO APPARENTLY NUMBER IN THE
DOZENS OR PERHAPS MILLIONS.
WE REALLY NEVER GET A HEAD COUNT
ON THE THREAT.
WE ARE NOT EVEN SURE THEY HAVE
HEADS.
THE VAGUENESS OF THE THREAT
CERTAINLY IS CONVENIENT MAINLY
BECAUSE IT’S HARD TO COUNT
SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T REALLY
EXIST.
UNLIKE THE PERSISTENT AND
VIOLENT CRIME WE NOW EXPERIENCE
EVERYTHING THE DAY ACROSS THIS
COUNTRY.
ODDLY NONE OF THAT IS CAUSED BY
PEOPLE IN RED HATS.
EXTREME MAGA AREN’T LIKE SHEEP.
YOU CAN’T COUNT THEM TO FALL
ASLEEP BECAUSE THERE’S REALLY
NOT ENOUGH OF THEM.
FOR A DEMOCRAT IT’S BEST NEVER
TO KNOW HOW TRULY BIG THE THREAT
IS WHERE IT MIGHT ACTUALLY END
UP GOING AWAY.
TRUMP SUPPORTERS REVENUE CLIMATE
CHANGE. WE CAN’T QUANTIFY IT BUT WE CAN
WE CAN’T QUANTIFY IT BUT WE CAN
TELL YOU IT’S EVIL.
THE FEAR TACTIC, IT’S EFFECTIVE.
THANKS TO JOE AND THE MEDIA, WE
HAVE A DEMOCRATIC MAJORITY IN A
POLL WHO BELIEVE THAT TRUMP
SUPPORTERS ARE A SERIOUS THREAT
TO DEMOCRACY.
THEY EVEN GOT 25% OF REPUBLICANS
TO AGREE.
LET’S BE HONEST.
THOSE WITH A REALLY DUMB ONES.
WHEN THOSE TO HER 25%, THEY
THOUGHT, ALL RIGHT, OUR BEST
APPROVAL NUMBERS EVER.
OF COURSE YOU HAVE THE DEMOCRATS
PUSHING THE IDEA THAT VIOLENCE
IS LOOMING AROUND THE CORNER.
HERE IS ERIC SWALWELL IN BETWEEN
BOUTS OF RAMPART FARTING AND
HAVING SEX WITH CHINESE SPIES.
>> THEY ARE SO OUT OF ALIGNMENT
WITH MAINSTREAM AMERICA.
THEY CAN’T WIN BACK THE MAJORITY
VOTES IN ELECTIONS THAT THEY NOW
ARE MORE COMFORTABLE WITH
VIOLENCE IN VOTING.
IT’S THEIR ONLY PATH TO ENACTING
THEIR POLITICAL AGENDA.
>> Greg: REMEMBER WHEN THAT
GUY RAN FOR PRESIDENT?
NEITHER CAN HE.
I THINK HE PULLED LOWER THAN
KAMALA HARRIS WHICH IS LIKE
SAYING THAT HE PULLED LOWER THAN ANAL WARTS.
ANAL WARTS.
NO OFFENSE TO PEOPLE WITH ANAL
WARTS.
IT’S A COMMON PROBLEM.
>> NOTHING A LITTLE OINTMENT
CAN’T CLEAR UP.
>> Greg: I DECIDED TO DO
RESEARCH ABOUT THE MAGA THREAT.
I KNOW I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO DO
THAT BUT IT WAS EITHER THAT OR BARE-KNUCKLE BOXING WITH DAVID
BARE-KNUCKLE BOXING WITH DAVID
BEN DOWELL -- DAVID McDOWELL.
DAGEN McDOWELL.
JOE AND THE MEDIA NEVER NAME THE
THREATS.
I WANTED TO SEE IF I COULD PUT A
NAME TO THE DEMON.
PERHAPS IT’S ONE OF THESE
REPUBLICAN CANDIDATES RUNNING
FOR OFFICE.
AFTER ALL, ALL THEY EVER TALK
ABOUT IS PORNOGRAPHY.
>> CAN YOU DEFINE WHAT
PORNOGRAPHIC MEANS TO YOU.
>> THERE’S TWO NAKED PEOPLE.
THEY ARE ACTING OUT A ACT,
MULTIPLE DIFFERENT SEXUAL ACTS.
DO YOU WANT ME TO SEND YOU SOME
SO YOU CAN SEE THEM.
THAT WOULD BE FINE.
>> Greg: I LOVE HER.
I REALLY LOVE HER.
WHY DID SHE STOP?
HONESTLY KIND OF WISH SHE’D KEPT
GOING.
I WAS JUST GETTING INTO IT.
I WAS MOMENTS AWAY FROM WHIPPING
OUT MY CREDIT CARD.
CREDIT CARD.
LET’S SEE GRETCHEN WHITMER MATCH
THAT KIND OF PILLOW TALK.
THEN MAYBE NOT.
THE FBI MIGHT TRY TO KIDNAP HER
AGAIN.
SO YEAH, THAT’S AND ALL BUT IS
IT A THREAT TO DEMOCRACY AND THE
SPY DEMOCRACY YOU MEAN MY PANTS.
HOWEVER THAT’S TERRIBLE.
I FOUND THE THREAT TO THIS GREAT
REPUBLIC.
HER NAME IS LINDA PAULSON.
I’M SURE YOU AGREE SHE’S A
MONSTER.
UTAH DISTRICT 12, LISTEN UP. THAT’S A NEW NAME ON THE BALLOT
THAT’S A NEW NAME ON THE BALLOT
FOR THE STATE SENATE.
♪ ♪
>> UTAH DISTRICT 12, LISTEN UP,
THERE’S A NEW NAME ON THE BOUT
FOR THE SENATE THIS YEAR. MY NAME IS LINDA PAULSON
MY NAME IS LINDA PAULSON
REPUBLICAN ALSO.
LOVE GOD AND COUNTRY IN THE
CONSTITUTION.
>> Greg: ALL RIGHT.
SHE’S WRAPPING AND SHE’S
ADORABLE.
SHE IS SMOKING ANY WEED, IT’S
DEFINITELY MEDICINAL.
LINDA, I WONDER IF YOU WERE
PRO-RELIGIOUS FREEDOM, PRO-LIFE,
PRO-POLICE.
>> THE RIGHT TO BEAR ARMS IN THE
RIGHT OF FREE SPEECH.
I WANT LESS GOVERNMENT CONTROL
AND REGULATION, WANT TO STOP AND
EXPOSE ALL POLITICAL CORRUPTION
CORRUPTION ♪
♪ INTEGRITY, REALITY, GOVERNMENT
PROGRAM SHOULD LEAD TO
SELF-SUFFICIENCY AND SUPPORT
TRADITIONAL FAMILY ♪
♪ THE FUNDAMENTAL UNIT OF
SOCIETY ♪
♪ IN SCHOOLS THEY ARE PUSHING
FOR NEW BELIEFS AND JUST TO
CLARIFY THIS ♪
♪ AS A FEMALE ADULT, I KNOW WHAT
A WOMAN IS ♪
[APPLAUSE]
>> Greg: .
SHE KNOWS WHAT A WOMAN IS.
SOMEONE INTRODUCING TO KETANJI
BROWN JACKSON.
SHE THINKS THERE’S TWO
BIOLOGICAL SEXES.
I WONDER IF SHE LOVES THIS
COUNTRY.
>> ♪ I LOVE THIS COUNTRY ♪
♪ IT’S A BLESSING TO BE FREE ♪
♪ BUT FREEDOM COMES WITH
RESPONSIBILITY ♪
♪ THE CONSTITUTION NEEDS TO BE
PROTECTED ♪
♪ NOT CHANGE OR DISREGARDED BUT
RESURRECTED ♪
♪ IF YOU SHARE MY VALUES ♪
♪ IF YOU LIKE WHAT I STAND FOR
MOBILE THEN GIVE ME YOUR VOTE ON
THE 8TH OF NOVEMBER ♪
♪ DISTRICT 12 NEEDS HER CHOICE,
LET HIM BE YOUR VOICE ABOUT LINDA PAULSON ♪
LINDA PAULSON ♪
♪ LINDA PAULSON FOR SENATE ♪
>> Greg: THERE’S A REAL THREAT
TO DEMOCRACY.
JOE McCARTHY AND DRAG WHICH
PROBABLY MEANS SHE’S A DECENT
PERSON, NICE LADY, SHOULD BE
ELECTED.
CURRENTLY NO ONE FITS THAT
DESCRIPTION WHO WORKS IN D.C.
I WOULD VOTE FOR HER BUT I’M NOT
A CITIZEN OF UTAH AND I’M NOT
ALLOWED AFTER THAT INCIDENT WITH
THE MORMON TABERNACLE CHOIR.
MORMON TABERNACLE CHOIR.
THAT’S THE LAST TIME I INQUIRE
ABOUT A MISSIONARY POSITION.
STILL THAT’S THE FACE OF THE
REPUBLICAN PARTY.
NO WONDER THE DEMOCRATS ARE
SCARED.
SENIOR CITIZEN WHO LIKES TO
WRAP?
I THINK I JUST DESCRIBED BRET BAIER.
BRET BAIER.
♪ ♪
SOME MORE VANILLA ICE IS ROLLING
IN HIS GRAVE.
LET’S WELCOME TIGHTS ASKED.
HE BROUGHT DEMOCRATS GRIEF BY
BRINGING PEACE TO THE
MIDDLE EAST.
FORMER SENIOR ADVISOR TO
PRESIDENT TRUMP AND AUTHOR OF THE NUMBER ONE BOOK MAKING
THE NUMBER ONE BOOK MAKING
HISTORY, JARED KUSHNER.
HE DOES HIS BEST WORK UNDERCOVER
AND UNDER THE COVERS.
FORMER CIA OPERATIVE AND HOST OF
BLACK FILES DECLASSIFIED ON
DISCOVERY SCIENCE CHANNEL,
MIKE BAKER.
SHE’S LIKE BEANIE BABY, CUTE BUT
WE ALL THOUGHT SHE’D BE WORTH
MORE MONEY BY NOW.
FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR KAT TIMPF.
AND FORTUNE-TELLERS CALL HIS
PALMS WAR AND PEACE BECAUSE THEY
TAKE FOREVER TO READ.
I KNOW.
MY MASSIVE SIDEKICK AND NWA
WORLD TELEVISION CHAMPION, TYRUS
TYRUS.
JARED, CONGRATULATIONS, NUMBER
ONE ON "THE NEW YORK TIMES"
SELLER LIST.
THERE IS ONE FLAW, I CHECKED THE
INDEX.
I’M NOT MENTIONED IN THIS BOOK
AT ALL.
>> MUST’VE BEEN THE FIRST
VERSION.
>> Greg: PLEASE PUT IT BACK IN
IN.
DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU ARE A
THREAT TO DEMOCRACY BECAUSE YOU
ARE PART OF THE TRUMP WORLD.
>> ACCORDING TO WHAT I HEAR
SOMETIMES I THINK WHAT THEY ARE.
SOMETHING PEOPLE DIDN’T
UNDERSTAND ABOUT TRUMP VOTERS,
THEY WANTED LOW GAS PRICES, LOW
TAXES.
THEY DIDN’T WANT WARS IN UKRAINE
OR CHINA BEING PROVOCATIVE.
I WANTED PEOPLE TO UNDERSTAND
ALL THE THINGS THAT HAPPENED
DURING THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION
DESPITE THE CRAZINESS.
WHETHER IT’S ACCUSING US OF
COLLUDING WITH RUSSIA FOR TWO
YEARS.
IT TURNED OUT WE DIDN’T COLLUDE
WITH RUSSIA.
THESE DIFFERENT CURRENTS THAT WE
WANTED TO COVER HER.
WHEN I TRAVEL THE COUNTRY, I SAW
TRUMP VOTERS WERE GOOD PEOPLE
WHO WANTED THEIR COUNTRY ARE
STORED IN THE WAY THEY WANTED TO
LIVE.
THAT WAS WHAT I TRIED TO
PORTRAY.
>> Greg: THAT’S WHAT I LIKED
ABOUT YOUR BOOK.
YOU WEREN’T PART OF THIS WORLD.
YOU ARE FORCED.
THROUGH MARRIAGE.
YOU ARE PROBABLY TYPICAL
NEW YORK LIBERAL.
YOU HAD TO HANG OUT WITH THESE
PEOPLE.
THIS IS REAL.
THESE ARE REAL PEOPLE.
I THOUGHT IT WAS INTERESTING.
I’M GOING TO PISS OFF SO MANY
PEOPLE BUT I THINK IT WAS THE
BEST BOOK ABOUT THE
ADMINISTRATION.
I THINK I WILL UPSET A FEW
PEOPLE BECOME ON THE SHOW.
YOU’RE BEHIND THE SCENES OF AND
A LOT OF STUFF.
THE MIDDLE EAST PEACE PROCESS.
YOU KNEW NOTHING ABOUT THIS.
YOU DIDN’T KNOW YOU ARE GOING TO
WORK ON IT.
YOU DIDN’T KNOW IT AND YOU DO IT
AND YOU SUCCEED BECAUSE YOU’RE
NOT A DIPLOMAT.
YOU SUCCEEDED BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT
A D.C. DIPLOMAT.
ANYWAY I HAVE BLOWN TOO MUCH
SMOKE UP YOUR ASS.
>> Jared: YOU CAN DO MORE IF
YOU LIKE.
WHAT WAS IMPORTANT TO PORTRAY IS
THAT I WASN’T IN NEW YORK
LIBERAL.
I WAS A PRAGMATIST.
WE HAVE THE TITLES TODAY.
I SHOW IT WAS LIKE TO TRAVEL
THROUGH THE COUNTRY, EXPLORE,
MEET PEOPLE, HAVE AN OPEN MIND
AND LEARN ABOUT THE MIDDLE EAST,
LEARNED ABOUT THE POLICIES
PEOPLE WANTED NCO
PRESIDENT TRUMP AND THE
ADMINISTRATION DELIVERED IT.
>> Greg: YOU WERE HELPING
PEOPLE.
MIKE BAKER, YOU ARE KILLING
THEM.
>> Mike: ONLY THE ONES THAT
WEREN’T HELPING.
>> Greg: ONLY KILL BAD PEOPLE?
WOULD YOU LIKE TO COMMENT ON?
HOW ABOUT MS. PAULSON.
CORNY BUT REALLY GOOD.
>> Mike: YAP.
FIRST OF ALL, IF I MIGHT SAY
YOUR WORK ON THE MIDDLE EAST
POLICIES, WELL DONE.
DIDN’T GET ENOUGH APPRECIATION.
SECOND. IF I MAY.
IF I MAY. SECOND, AS FAR AS SINCE WHEN
SECOND, AS FAR AS SINCE WHEN
DOES PORNOGRAPHY ONLY INVOLVES
TWO PEOPLE AND NO ONE MODEL.
WHAT KIND OF PORN SHE WATCHING.
LINDA PAULSON, GOD BLESS HER,
SHE REMINDS ME OF MY MOM AND
AWAY, REST HER SOUL.
IF YOU DECIDE TO TURN YOUR
CAMPAIGN AD INTO A RAP VIDEO, BE
PREPARED TO GET KICKED IN THE
ASS ON SOCIAL MEDIA AND MOVE ON.
IT’S FUN.
I DON’T THINK WE ARE GOING TO
SEE A LOT OF THESE FROM HER.
>> Greg: THAT’S A SAFE
PREDICTION.
>> Mike: SHE IS A ONE-HIT
WONDER.
>> Kat: IF YOU’RE GOING TO DO
A RAP, YOU SHOULD ASK YOURSELF,
IS MY NAME LINDA?
IF IT IS, YOU’VE GOT TO BE
PREPARED MAY BE THE REACTION IS
GOING TO BE MIXED.
IT WAS CRINGEWORTHY.
I SAY THIS IS SOMEBODY WHO, I
DON’T HAVE ENOUGH RHYTHM FOR THE
CHOREOGRAPHY AND A SOULCYCLE
COSTS.
NOT SO MUCH A JOKE IS SOMETHING
THAT I HAD TO LEARN THE HARD WAY
WAY.
SHE DIDN’T REALLY SEEM TO BE
TRYING.
SHE CLEARLY REPORTED THAT ONE
TIME WITH NO THOUGHT OF RHYTHM
OR CADENCE FOR ANYTHING.
>> Greg: I CAN’T BELIEVE
YOU’RE SERIOUSLY CRITICIZING
THIS.
I WAS MORE CRITICAL OF THE
MUSIC.
I HOPE THE MUSIC WAS NOT AS GOOD
AS HER VOICE.
>> Kat: SERIOUSLY CRITICAL IS
AN OVEREMPHASIS OF HOW MUCH I
CARE.
I’M NOT GOING TO LISTEN TO IT
AGAIN RECREATIONALLY.
>> Greg: I AM.
I’M GOING TO HAVE IT ON REPEAT
IN THE HOT TUB.
YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING?
>> Tyrus: NO.
>> Kat: NO.
>> Tyrus: I LOVED IT.
WHAT I LOVE THE MOST ABOUT IT.
WE SEEM TO FORGET THIS IS WHERE
THE MEDIA ALWAYS KIND OF TELLS
THEMSELVES.
THE FIRST THING YOU HEARD FROM
ALL THESE MEDIA EXPERTS WAS HOW
SHE WASN’T BLACK.
I FOUND LIKE WOW, THAT’S REALLY
RACIST THING TO SAY THAT AN ART
FORM CAN’T BE EXPRESSED BY
ANYONE.
SURE THE RHYTHM WAS OFF BUT HER
HEART WAS IN IT AND I LISTEN TO
THE WHOLE THING BECAUSE I WAS
LAUGHING TO PUT A SMILE ON MY
FACE.
THAT’S KIND OF THE WHOLE POINT
OF WANT WRAP IS.
I GUESS NO ONE EVER HEARD OF
EMINEM OR THE BEASTIE BOYS.
IT’S AN ART FORM.
>> LEFT OUT VANILLA ICE.
>> Tyrus: VANILLA ICE LEFT HIMSELF OUT.
HIMSELF OUT.
>> Greg: R.I.P.
>> Tyrus: STILL ALIVE AND
PROBABLY WAITING FOR YOU IN THE
PARKING LOT.
SOMEONE DOES SOMETHING
OUT-OF-THE-BOX IN THE LEFT
REMINDS US THAT ONLY BLACK
PEOPLE CAN DO THIS.
SAYS WHO?
>> Greg: LINDA PROVED IT.
RHYMING CONSTITUTION IS HARD FOR
ANYBODY.
>> Tyrus: SHE DID IT AND I
KNOW EXACTLY WHERE SHE STANDS ON
EVERYTHING.
FIND ANOTHER POLITICIAN RIGHT
NOW OR YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHERE
THEY STAND.
>> Greg: THEY SHOULD ALL BE
WRAPPING.
>> Tyrus: WE KNOW WHERE SHE
STANDS WHERE SHE IS ABOUT HOW
HAPPY SHE IS IN BOTH OF HER HIPS
WORK.
SHE HAD A LOT OF THINGS GOING
ON.
GOOD FOR HER.
>> Greg: EXCELLENT POINT.
WHEN I HOST THE FOX DEBATE IN
2024.
I HAVEN’T TOLD ANYBODY YET.
I’M GOING TO BE HOSTING THE FOX
DEBATE.
>> Greg: DROPPED 16 BARS.
GO.
>> Greg: AM GOING TO HAVE ALL
THE CANDIDATES WRAP THERE.
>> Tyrus: THAT’S WHAT 16 BARS
MEAN.
CRITICIZE HER AND YOU DON’T KNOW THE LANGUAGE.
THE LANGUAGE.
>> Kat: I MEANT RAP.