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cross your heart and hope to die because
this week's episode is g to
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suck hello Internet welcome to Game
Theory and happy Halloween my little
nightmare creatures oh what's that
Halloween was Monday day you say huh
well I'm working on this episode at 1
p.m. on all Hollows Eve so that should
show you how dedicated I am to all of
you or how pathetic my social life is
speaking of which I love Dracula back in
the first grade when I was just a wee
Little Tots we had to fill out this form
talking about all of our favorite things
one of the questions was who are your
role models my answer mom dad and
Dracula weird right a few questions
later when I was asked what I wanted to
learn that year I said chemistry so you
can tell I was a confused child anyway 2
years ago I finally got to meet the
count in person and drive a stake
through his Undead
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heart I was also brutally assaulted by
his three vampire maidens but that's
another story and for as long as I've
been a vlat holic I've also been a
Castlevania fan during college I finally
took the time to play through every
every single game in the series both the
highs and the lows uhhuh they're huge
whilst logging through the fourth
Symphony of the Night clone I began to
wonder how faithful these games were to
Bram Stoker's original description of
the count nowadays with so many years of
movies games and TV shows that abuse
vampire lore yeah I'm looking at you
Sparkles you have to ask how much power
was dra originally given so this week
we're looking at nearly 40 Castlevania
games to see which one features the most
accurate version of the original Caped
Crusader let's start off with a huge
spoiler about Castlevania games ready
Dracula is the final boss huh shocking
right so if you were expecting a fire
breathing lizard or I don't know a
largemouth bass I'm sorry to ruin the
surprise but not all games in the
franchise feature the toothy
Transylvanian so let's just eliminate
those right off the bat next a pro tip
when you fight Dracula aim for the head
in most games the first form of Dracula
can only be damaged by a good
old-fashioned whip to the face yeah pop
his head off why is Game Theory suddenly
devolved into a walkthrough video you
ask well the strategy has a literary
basis according to Bram Stoker's novel
The only way to kill a vampire for good
is to decapitate him before impaling the
body with a wooden stake and here's
another surprise it does doesn't even
have to be wooden or a steak silver
Stakes or even a sacred bullet are said
to work in fact the novel has Dracula
dying when a knife goes through his
heart but since none of the games have
you using Stakes wooden or otherwise
against anything other than a stupid
glowing orb decapitation is the closest
the series gets the funny thing is after
centuries of fighting the Prince of
Darkness the Belmonts still wonder why
they have to kill Dracula so many times
it's because you're do doing it wrong
you know I wouldn't be surprised if
that's been their plan all along
injuring Dracula just enough so that he
keeps coming back every hundred years it
keeps them in a job and I'm sure the
villagers shower them with money and
women when they're done the Belmont
conspiracy anyway it's just a theory a
game theory wait we're not done yet so
now that we've eliminated the games
where you can injure Dracula by
attacking his body here's another
surprise Bram Stoker's original Dracula
isn't killed by sunlight according to
chapter 18 of the novel he loses his
powers during the day but he doesn't
burst into flames or melt into a
skeleton or twinkle like a disco ball
the sunlight death is actually a much
more recent development dating back to
as far as I can find the 1922 film NOS
Fatu which was a copyright infringing
ripoff of Bram Stoker's ideas because
the film couldn't get the rights to the
novel they changed a couple things
including Count Dracula's name to count
orlock in any event the sunlight death
eliminates installments like Super
Castlevania 4 moving away from his death
maybe the way he looks will help us
narrow the field further in the book
He's described as an old man dressed in
all black with white hair a mustache and
pointed ears later it's mentioned that
he has a pointed beard hooked nose and
blue eyes that turned red when angered a
few games come close to capturing this
description but I would say that castle
64 and its counterpart Legacy of
Darkness capture the image perfectly
back in the novel when Dracula gains
more power he grows younger and younger
in appearance but in the games he
usually appears only at the end so that
doesn't help us out all that much right
now we'll come back to it let's look at
his powers chapter 18 of the novel
mentions that Dracula can control the
weather it's a flimsy explanation for
his ubiquitous use of fireballs but it
does explain his occasional lightning
attack and the nintend 64 games take it
one step further by not only including
fire and lightning but also control over
the wind these games also take advantage
of something all the others Overlook a
vampires ability to climb walls in the
novel Jonathan Harker the hero describes
Dracula as climbing down the Castle's
walls in a lizard fashion and even
though Dracula himself never uses this
power in the N64 games other vampires do
the count can also transform into a Mist
fog bat or wolf unlike most others in
the series where Dracula teleports using
pillars of light the N64 games use Mist
power constantly and even though the two
games are virtually identical Legacy of
Darkness edges out its twin brother
because its story actually shows how
Dracula gains the ability to turn into a
wolf so the N64 games he looks like
Dracula he acts like Dracula and he's
killed like Dracula the first 3D
Castlevania largely hated by many fans
of the series are the closest to the
original novel but here's the real twist
and this is a legitimate spoiler alert
it's not Dracula the most accurate
portrayal of Dracula across 40 games is
actually some guy named Gilder Dracula's
servant remember how I said that Dracula
can grow younger throughout the game you
encounter this odd little boy named
malice who oh come on do I even need to
tell you he's dracul in Disguise look at
him just like in the novel malice SL
Dracula changes age as his power level
grows and he's actually able to go out
in the sun oh and Dracula controls
animals I should mention that too as the
last bit of proof let's talk history the
name Dracula is the given name of Vlad
Tesh AKA Vlad III AKA Vlad the Impaler
his father Vlad II was admitted to a
Secret order of knights called the order
of the Dragon around 1431 this earned
him the name dracul which means Dragon
thus his son became Dracula or son of
the Dragon in most Castlevania games
Dracula has a second beast or demon-like
form Castlevania 64 is the only time
that this form is the shape of a dragon
a centipede Dragon hybrid that fires
nuclear bombs but a dragon nonetheless
it's also one of the few times he uses
his actual name Vlad Tes Castlevania on
the N64 the most historically accurate
Castlevania game just ignore the part
with the skeletons on the motorcycles
anyway it's just a theory a game theory
happy Halloween
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