*WHAPSHH!* (Other subtitlers, the entire thing is messed up after 3:14. Someone used auto captions, needs to be fixed.)
Wade : Alright picking teams
Jack: (Making noises)Bob: 3, 2,
Bob: 1,
Bob: Go (Jack coughing)
Mark: Who is who I can't tell
Jack: Ahhh we picked the same teams again you dumbs
Mark: Well y a
Bob: would some-one switch Wade: ok I'll switch
Bob: You switch wade you switch
Wade: I've switched
Jack: Ahh but know I'm with Wade
Wade: Oh suck it
Mark: Wow
Bob: Jesus
Mark: Wow
Bob: Unrelenting.
Jack: HeHeHe
Mark: Wow
Wade: Deal with it
Jack: This prop does not work
Bob: Wade did you just turn into your
your drunk
aunt
who's who's telling you to deal with it at the christmas party
Jack: what Mark: Deal with it
Wade: Deal with it
Jack: Oh my god there's a baby pinned to the wall with a knife over here
Wade: Oh I've played this map this map is HUGE!!!
Bob: you look like you need some food sir
Bob: you look like you need some, there you go
Bob: and uh you look like you need some also I know your facing the wrong way but if I just
*Jack lauging * Bob : there you go
Wade: Is uh, is one of you a floating orange?
Jack: I'm reflecting on
Jack: life
Wade: Wait Bob: Are you in this hall way?
Bob: No.
Jack: Aren't you glad I'm not floating?
Wade: Jack, I thought you were on my team.
Jack: Oh wait. Mark: No no no
Mark: Wait.. Bob: Wait,
Bob: How would- How would Wade and I be on the same team?
Mark: Wait yeh- wait what happened? Jack: We're on the same teams again!
Wade: Hey orange your too fast
Jack: No I'm not.
Jack: I'm just the adequate speed an orange should be
Jack: There's blood on the floor! Bob: Oh here's some.. oh.
Wade: Someone needs to join Bob's team
Bob: Someone help me
Jack: How do I switch? Mark: How do I switch teams?
Wade: Press F1 and click "change team".
Mark: Wow. Actually, Bob, that is...
Mark: I didn't even know you were there.
Jack: I don't think sitting around is allowed on this map, Jesus. Bob: Yeah, baby.
Mark: uhhhhhhh
Mark: It is, it is. Bob: I'm outside. I gave you that hint. I am outside.
Mark: Yeah.
Mark: He's, uhh...
Mark: That fits amazingly well.
Wade: Are you a sack? Bob: No.
Bob: Nope. Jack: (laughs)
Bob: Are YOU a sack? How's that feel?
Bob: You sack!
Wade: (cries) Jack: You piece of sack!
Wade: Wait a minute, Jack. I think I've found him.
Bob: No! No! Wait!
Wade: Come back here! Bob: Come on, let's talk about this! Mark: (laughs)
Jack: What is he?
Wade: Noooo!
Jack: What was he?
Mark: (chuckling) Ah, man. Bob: (shrieking) AH! AH! AH! AH!
Mark: (laughing) Wade: He was a metal pipe sitting on the side of the wood.
Jack: Woah!
Mark: How did you even find that? Bob: It was-
Bob: It was 2v1, man!
Mark: Hey Bob, I'm coming behind ya
Mark: wait
Wade: Oh hey
Wade: How's it going?
Mark: Uh - shuh - were you waiting for something there, Wade?
Wade: Ya I was, uh, waiting for Bob.
Wade: Pshhhhhhhhhhh
Jack: Are you, like, sniffing? Or fuckin - spaying a hose?
Jack: What are you doing? Mark: Ya
Mark: I can't tell what you're doing
Bob: Hey - fire extinguisher, fuckin come here and listen to me. Jack: ohhhh
Jack: You're a fire extinguisher - ok
Wade : Yeah he's the one with the knife Mark: (laugh)
Bob: Oh yeah he is
Wade: No don't cut my cord
Bob: you know what this is right now
Mark: this place is like
Bob: Are you outside or inside Jack? Jack: I'm outside and I can't get inside
Mark: ohh you're that big huh? Wade: Ohh
Mark: oh ok Jack: No Bob: (whispers) he's Huge
Wade: PSHH
Mark: god for some reason this map kills my frame-rates.
Mark: are you guys getting the same thing? Jack: Yeah every now and then I get stutters
Wade: Oh my goddness Mark: For the Chinese
Wade: um theres a lot of fish down here
Mark: Are you thinkin what we're thinking? yeah there's something
Wade: Yeah theres somethin fishy going on
Mark: (Laughing) Just Bob goes n' starts slapping everything fish in the water (starts yelling)
Wade: What's up buddy? I had a pretty good spot
Jack: I didn't wanna be too cheeky- wait come to where I WAS.
Wade: I see you were trying to use my metal pole tactics.
Jack: Were you the same metal pole?
Wade: Yeah, I was that metal pole.
*Mark laughing in background*
Jack: I was over here. How-how obvious would I have been? Just like right next to this pole.
Bob, Wade, and Mark: Oh, yeah, that's nice. That would have been nice. That's good.
Jack: The double pole.
Bob: The only thing that gives you away is your little shadow...pizza slice shadow thing.
Jack: You do realize Wade just ran away right?
Bob: That's fine.
Mark: Yeah, that's fine.
Mark: He did-he did his job.
Jack: Did he? 'Cause he didn't find me. Bob found me.
Bob: I mean it's whatever.
Wade: I--I led him
last for you how can you wait sorry can
you like jump can you jump up on these
benches maybe and the try and like jump
across and get on the roof I wanted
really sorry yeah we did not mean hey
fuck man
hurry I i see i see what it is I see how
sorry old blood mark I did it was an
accident the button is really close to
the not shoot button I'm sorry I can't
walk slowly so I'm just gonna have to
sprint in short bursts away from you
okay I shake every bar Jack we say he
like his mom oh I was about to kill
myself hahaha you know what I found
blade and someone has feels better about
everything so okay I'm the problem for
this bullshit here we guard i'm inside
and I look kind of like a dick give you
a hint right off the bat well yeah but
what does look like shit Jack sling is
far away made me do that like weird
snores exhale and it hurt my neck
there's like mid grass I got a suicide
bomb who won oh Jesus Christ I just
walked in and that went off so thank you
for that i found a ball that gave me a
suicide oh wait are you a big prop oh my
god you think you kind of look like a
dick are you like big ish I'm I'm like
medium liebig yeah yeah I think I know
what you are are you like a propane tank
no they kinda look like dicks yeah I
look like a dick from like most from the
right angle okay well sorry i'll give
you inside for me i'm inside I don't
know what the fuck I am I think I'm a
bucket of shit with a stick in it oh
we're the same thing oh you're that
thing yeah it looks like a dick right I
mean kind of yeah we're in the kitchen
bro okay come on my hey oh oh no oh yeah
I'm bananas no I'll all the way wait I'm
not running away yeah they're not
running away they're just leaving nah I
don't know I'm not running anywhere to
control them ah there you go
i don`t know where mark went
i said i wasn`t running away yeah well yeah I
don't know what you are going to be
probably 50 tell him just tell him wait
amazed when I wasn't here I shall
probably ran away with a patient of the
beam he was fucking me fucking feeds
descending below any was great I didn't
know you were born up and around killed
your ass didn't I hear you do really bad
things around on a dad that I was with
wait now you know why I might kill did
you have last round jackets right big
fat zero hey oh I don't know if we get a
woman bring 10 hahahaha don't make sushi
oh yeah I guess okay I'll follow you
fucking stuck in this feeling are you
kidding me ok ok I got it I got a clan
no I got I got up here Wow cool meet you
come on get you out help me where are
you I'm in one of the blue tunnels I
like backpack sometimes you just gotta
let me go mark I'm gonna go where
they're happening oh are you are you
ready mark No hey Bob please oh it's
gonna be up to you okay die everything
to you I can't take that level of stress
I love you mark oh I have strong
feelings for you Oh reciprocate he
killed me the interest and create your
love I think we're finding out all just
two things about our friend Mark like it
wouldn't kill you well you don't front
like both of us so what oh yeah well
then you're not dead what I don't know
who said someone was dead we talked
about I thought you can't okay you know
at last you have is a while ago that's
right okay I didn't even realize that
I'm stuck so good job me oh hey alright
so they're not here wait
they're not here another goofin me are
you guys really in the hallway where we
were stuck oh one of them just a box is
just ran away now one of them is a
barrel in the hallway mark mom a little
fucking whore every night I go back
Jack's in the kitchen with dinah that
bastard dr. Margot regular kitchen okay
all right then someone just wait here
than in there I dings here oh he's going
back out the door he's a teapot going
back out the door now I'm on the way oh
wait mark each other well I'm not
recognition shut up I on the way now
he's a fucking tiny little piece of
paper now he's a pipe your dicking with me
I fucked myself for sure I don't weird oh
I fucked good do hey mr oh wait oh wait
are you that I think oh ok Mac Bloo Bloo
holy blue homie go go I'm on it I'm on
the way you when he ran down here right
now this way huh he became some shit
check those oh no it's fine no oh my god
no what nail glue hallway I'm not
exactly as you left where all my god why
I don't understand what you have legs
actually Oh everyone's perspective I
thought you just liked explore what
looked like it did
yes yeah I like too much help Oh No yes
I like here is why you fuck yourself ah
no no come in Butte it's ok ok wait wait
wait can I cozy drawers dude it's ok
we're all friends here poor hun knife
down put yourself down oh wait wait
another way wait I can't I can't ever be
really combat all right ok denon nnnnn
engine and approach I'm sorry Joseph II
I had to defend myself oh god I fell
into the portal the Otherworld coil it
that supporters in other words haha wow
wow wait wait wait what you're like
you're like me levels of ignorant right
now whoever that was me wow wow I what I
wrong god this is fun so one are you
were right here whoa fish into the
portal Bob oh you have a life no wow I
was trying to do for a very long time
with get on the light but fucking
impossible good i'm home nice thanks man
it's all that uh premature ejaculation
what ah shit you be come on game fucking
do me like this will stick me I didn't
know I was becoming the whole thing
that's the worst let me get the whole
thing in there there's a ball floating
around come on how do they like it for
myself up some ethereal shit going on
over here ooh wait bob is that where we
kiss it's not the blue hallway
no way yeah you're the bowling ball this
year I printer weight is daunting and
why would I do now I'm in the ground all
right back what is going on with you I
don't know i can i'm like in sight man
Rob camera wise ooh I can't see the
autumn scene is black and the ground oh
god jack oh no that does not look
natural Jack sorry though I know inside
or outside I been around a little bit
you don't just my catcher's mitt is that
good no that's better worst record you
could face you're about to face yet lock
it right there I don't notice then Oh
inside my prop my oh my buddy order
extra bags of fertilizer it offends Jack
it's really funny okay free free oh
you're talking about what oh my health
was reduced by 20 health points office
yeah I got one of those little balls of
mine baby like i was gonna bog turtle
bro ah but soda can Jack you're in a
good never mind you were fine wow I
guess is too big of a masterly staying
still on them yeah what is it is it uh
I'm fucking stock again I hate apple
like what does map so much oh yeah cool
that that fucking fits their yep oh free
blue Holloway what's up okay blow away
oh yeah you alway by that's where that's
where that happened I don't think it was
telling it I don't think it was telling
the truth there uh thanks ma'am in the
blue hallway I make it easy on you guys
o.o jack black r you guys
I first found me me are there really
good they're surprising linear and near
there near near there buddy all right
Boosh oh fuck I was gonna look cool but
then hahaha oh wow you do look really
good Zach right on let me see I want to
see how good a close race wait no walk
away and let mark find me naturally
fucking late now mark did you find him
yet yeah naturally wait wait a Mac can
you find me I know it tires were joke I
know you have deprecated you with this
game but slowly as a nice finishing
touch walk your rotation Jack I have an
idea wait wait wait wait ok I won't pan
I didn't see chances that you gave me
away hold still hold still my usually
cannot know Jackie see I'm gonna shove
that inside of him you can't always much
ok you gotta relax I gotta relax okay
wait whoa I'm relaxing I'm relaxing
which end of my which I shoving it in
that is not very relaxed ah jasonj this
n go for what I have a better idea oh I
did damn dunk it right in there is it
the suite and break of death wah nails I
go in you got me fucking kill me please
kill me I don't I don't want to win I
know do another time good I don't know
it meant a plan no no no come on
glamsham thank you where the killer got
it no no I don't want to be it hard
enough being a fucking human that is the
poopin wink
back in late to take you jerk oh shit
the turtle really deserve that though
yeah