so you want to text your ex back do you well sit back relax because this will be
one of the most important videos you're ever gonna watch on this subject here on
YouTube now I'm just gonna I'm just gonna jump straight into it and start
off by showing you this infographic that summarizes my complete texting system to
get your ex back now over the years I've tweaked my methodology and made
improvements based on the case studies that I've conducted with my clients
now this infographic is also based on many years of psychological research so
if you follow these steps to a tee you'll have the best chance possible of
getting back together with your ex and by the way if you want to download this
infographic I'll have a link to it in the description below so let's just jump
into this five-step system for texting your ex back now the first step is what
I call the good note initiative the whole purpose of this step is to end the
interaction with your ex on as you guess that a good note now if you've watched
my videos before you'll know that the no contact phase is one of the most vital
aspects of my entire system but if you enter no contact with bad blood between
you and your ex the situation might get worse so if you begged pleaded or said
something mean or awful to your ex you need to make sure that you don't leave
this bad taste in their mouths before the no contact phase now there's a
variety of texts that you can send during this phase to begin the good note
initiative one of them is what I like to call the Fresh Start text now it goes
something like this hey sorry if I said anything to offend you the other day
really don't want anything between us hope your day goes well or you could say
hey I'm really sorry for my erratic behavior the other day I've just been
going through a lot hope you have a good one really the key here is to make sure
that you apologize for whatever you think you've done wrong and make sure
that you end the text in a way that doesn't force your ex to respond that
means that you absolutely should not ask him/her a question and whatever you do
do not respond if your ex texts you back even if they ask you a question no
contact begins now and that means that you should not under any circumstances
contact your ex for almost any reason now there are several other good ways to
to begin the good note initiative for example another way is to send what I
like to call the blank slate email now this email is designed to fix whatever
negativity was left behind between you and your ex and sometimes it's good
enough to make X wants you back if you want to learn a
little bit more about the blank slate email just head over to breakupbrad.com
and watch that full video on my website it'll fill you in on how to get all of
my secret text messages plus much more that's breakupbrad.com if you want to
watch that so now that you've ended the interaction with your X on a positive
note it's time to engage in step 2 which is something that I like to call
operative no contact now you might have heard about no contact in the past and I
do still advocate for that generally speaking but based on my latest research
my most successful clients don't just engage in no contact they engage in
periphery tactics and behaviors that increase their chances of getting back
together with their ex and texting plays a big big role in this but how do you
use text messages when you shouldn't be contacting your ex well young padawan
I'm glad you asked so you can engage in what I like to call my covert jealousy
tactic so instead of texting your ex you can text a mutual friend that you both
share but make sure that this friend is truly neutral I mean if you're if you're
texting your ex is best or a close friend it's not going to work
because it'll seem like you're still trying to be involved in your ex's life
or that you're trying to steal your ex's friend away from them what you want to
do is text a friend that you're both equally close to so let me just jump
into an example here to better explain what I mean
so - this mutual friend you could say something like hey how goes it
what was that restaurant you and your friend were talking about the other day
I want to take someone there or you could say hey I'm going with someone to
step class tomorrow night want to come now for the latter text that I just
mentioned actually bring a date to step class with you or whatever activity you
want and once your friend gets wind of what's going on he or she will be
tempted to blab something to your ex and if your ex gets a whiff that you're
dating around they're gonna feel a sense of jealousy and loss that they've never
experienced before trust me it works like a charm but subtlety is the key
here you don't want to make it obvious to your friend or to your ex that you're
trying anything sneaky if they get a sense of what you're trying to do you're
gonna blow it and your ex will probably lose even more attraction for you so
let's take a jump into step 3 of the infographic and that is to engage in a
huge self-improvement campaign now this part doesn't involve much texting but I
can't disregard this crucial step in your journey to get your ex back during
this time it's easy to feel the prep and do absolutely nothing after you've
lost someone you love I mean I know how difficult that can be but let me tell
you a cool story about one of my clients let's call him Roger I don't actually
have permission to use his real name so let's just go with that for the sake of
this video he's a 35 year old naval officer up here
in Canada and his girlfriend of two years had just dumped him he was
completely shattered to the point where it was affecting his entire life you
know he couldn't eat he could barely sleep and all he could think about was
what she was doing and how he was gonna get back together with her that probably
sounds like a familiar story doesn't it well Roger signed up for my personal
coaching program and he told me the whole story
after a few quick emails back and forth I told him that his energy and
motivations were pointing him in the wrong direction and that he was actually
hurting his chances of getting back together with her he was trying to come
up with grand gestures to get his ex to come back to him but I told him that if
he really wanted his ex back he should be diverting his attention to himself
now I told you to think of it this way your ex broke off with you because of a
very specific reason and in this case it's because his ex lost her attraction
for Roger and then I told him that the only way to get her back was to focus on
whatever made her lose that attraction for Roger in the first place and fix it
now Roger told me that before the break-up
he was extremely complacent in the relationship you know he stopped
pursuing his passions of cooking playing the violin and painting all he really
wanted to do it seemed was stay at home and watch Amazon Prime he told me that
he worked long hours at the base and that when he came home he was completely
drained and this drove Rogers girlfriend away and and I suspected that this was
the real reason why she broke up with him so instead of wallowing in his
sorrow I told Roger to focus his time and energy on why his ex broke up with
him in the first place I told Roger that now is the time to focus on renewing his
passions setting new goals and living his best life I told him that once his
ex saw his renewed vigor for life she'd begin to miss him and lo and behold
after using some of the tactics I outlined she did she reached out to him
and wanted to grab coffee and I think the rest was history I haven't heard
from Roger for about a week now but the last time I checked they were back
together and happier than ever so by focusing all of his time and energy on
step 3 self-improvement he was able to make his
see what she was missing and this is something that I've seen time and time
again when you focus on becoming the best version of yourself people begin to
feel an attraction for you so if you want to learn more about how you can
diagnose the real reason why your ex broke up with you in the first place
check out my personal coaching program just head over to breakupbrad.com slash
coaching and on that page you'll see my availability and how coaching works
again the URL is breakupbrad.com slash coaching alright and on to step four now
which is to establish first contact this is where texting really comes into play
usually I suggest to my clients that they wait at least 30 days before
contacting their exes but sometimes actually depending on the situation I
even suggest a slightly longer operative no contact period again if you're unsure
you can sign up for that coaching program and you can ask me personally
anyways the goal of first contact is simple all you want to do is establish
positive rapport so let's jump into a quick texting example I call it the help
text so you can say something like hey I've been doing some research on
intermittent fasting I knew you're really good with this stuff so could I
buy you a copy it's coffee so I could pick your brain I'd love to catch up to
where you could say hey I've been getting a lot more into Thai cooking
lately you always made the best Pad Thai any chance I can ask you some questions
now the goal here isn't to try and seduce your ex back into your life but
to simply build friendly rapport and to set up a date and another thing you
should remember is that you should be asking about something that your ex is
passionate about remember people always want to talk about the things that
they're interested in so keep this in mind when you're crafting your first
contact text message when you're setting up a date with your ex you need to give
off the impression that you're only interested in being friends if you're X
explicitly asks you what the meeting is all about
you could say that you're simply wanting a friendly catch-up and that's all now I
have a ton of other videos but what to do on the first date but given the scope
of this video I'm just gonna skip that and head right on over to my last step
which is step 5 riah traction now once you've
established contact with your ex and gone out on a date he or she should be
missing you like crazy if you've played your cards correctly all you have to do
now is send a few more texts to seal the deal now again for this we're gonna
reuse some covert jealousy tactics so you could text your ex something like
this girl I went out with the I told me the craziest story about how
she remembered me from high school it was nuts or this guy had met up with
last night mentioned this amazing dish that he wanted to make for me it's a pad
thai dish I'm super stoked for it now again the key here is that you can't
make it obvious that you're trying to make your ex jealous or that you're
actively seeing anyone else right now you just want to plant a psychological
seed in their brain that you're indeed being pursued by by other men or women
of course you're gonna have to play it by ear depending on where you're at with
your ex this text might be a little inappropriate if you're already close to
sealing the deal with your ex the thought of you dating around might be a
huge turnoff to them so make sure you think these things through before you do
send a text message like this but if you do do it right and your ex gets wind of
how highly sought-after you are they'll come running back to you I guarantee it
so there you have it I know I've only briefly touched on every step here so if
you want to learn my complete system just follow this free video guide on my
website head over to breakupbrad.com select the right video for your gender
and wash away it isn't a very long video so if you're interested in getting your
ex back then head over there right now breakup brad calm alright thanks a lot
for watching and I'll see you in the next video
you