Throughout human history, there have been many marginalised groups – people that have been
treated unfairly, or persecuted, often for very trivial reasons. There’s something about human
nature that treats the “other”, or the “outsider”, worse than their own. I suppose this is a
phenomenon seen throughout the animal kingdom. Animals favour their own kind over others.
Survival of the fittest. Human-to-human cruelty has been witnessed across all nations and across
all cultures since the dawn of civilisation. Understandably, marginalised groups have long
sought to be treated fairly, to be treated with dignity and respect. They have been victimised
for generations, and have only ever wished to be treated the same as their fellow man. Fortunately,
especially in recent times, many of these groups have achieved equality under the law,
perhaps not in every jurisdiction, but in many. Life is good, right? Well…
Unfortunately, some groups are simply not satisfied with the result. To be fair,
it isn’t all members of these groups. Let’s just say that some members of some groups are not
satisfied with equality under the law. Proponents argue that despite their many legal victories,
institutional or systemic discrimination still exists, and therefore, more needs
to be done to level the playing field. Equality under the law is no longer enough. Some of them
actively want their historical oppressors to be punished in some way, some sort of
inter-generational revenge. They want their persecutors to pay for their historical sins.
In this video, I would like to discuss the tendency for some groups of individuals to
go from being victimised, to attaining equality, to becoming the oppressors themselves. I don’t
want to pick on any particular group, that wouldn’t be very fair. So in this video,
we’ll take a look at a fictional account of a group of historically marginalised
people who look pretty much like you and me except for one glaring difference,
they have a supernumerary arm growing out of their head. Historically,
they have colloquially been referred to as “armheads”, and this is their story.
Throughout human history, armheads have made up approximately 2% of the
world’s population. Archaeological records show that they have been present on all
continents across many different cultures. One thing that is universally consistent,
however, is that historically armheads have faced prejudice and discrimination.
In the 1700s, for example, during the Age of Sail, the great seafaring nations travelled
to distant lands collecting armheads as they went. At first, they convinced them to board voluntarily
with promises of free food, shelter, and a better life. But in reality, it was a one-way ticket to a
forced labour camp. Sure, they got their food and shelter, but in return they were forced to work
out in the sweltering fields. And as a few of them quickly found out, they weren’t free to leave.
Around the 1860s, these nations finally came to their senses and made it illegal
to hold a armhead against their will for the purposes of forced
labour. “All armheads are, and henceforward shall be free.”
However, old prejudices die hard, and up until the 1940s, armheads were still
treated very poorly. They were basically forced to keep to themselves in their own communities.
When they did venture out, they weren’t allowed to go to restaurants, or cinemas,
and they had to use their own restrooms. Kids on the street would often shout out,
“Hey armhead! What’s that hideous thing growing out of your head? Ha ha ha ha!”
In the 1950s, armheads were finally allowed to attend normal schools alongside regular
children. Many friendships grew between the two different groups
as they were now allowed to socialise with one another.
In 1962, something historical happened at the JFK International Airport in New York. At the time,
there was an unwritten rule that normal folk would always board a plane first, and then armheads
would board last and sit at the back of the plane. But one day, an armhead lady by the name
of Stenetta McAlpine decided that she had enough of being treated like a second-class citizen and
boarded the plane first. Shocked onlookers didn’t know what to do and just watched her board the
plane. Finally, police were called and despite her not having broken any laws, she was arrested and
charged for public nuisance. The story got out across the country inspiring copycat incidents.
More and more armheads were boarding planes before regular Americans resulting in complete and utter
chaos at airports. Airfares had to be increased to pay for the additional security costs.
Due to this mass civil disobedience, in 1963, the Armhead Rebellion Movement (A.R.M.) was formed.
It’s motto was simple. “Armheads Unite! Armheads Rebel!” Throughout the 1960s, A.R.M. groups banded
together with sympathetic regular Americans, colloquially referred to as “roundheads”,
or “roundies”, and would show up at restaurants and cinemas and the like, and sit in all available
spaces. They would then request service, and then would refuse to leave when denied service.
In addition to creating disruptions and drawing unwanted publicity, this action caused economic
hardship for the owners of these businesses, as paying customers weren’t able to enter.
In 1968, New York state was the first state to legalise marriage between armheads and regular
folk. Over the following years, this spread to other states and soon became federal law. Due to
these changes, the number of armheads rose from 2% of the population to 5% in a short space of time.
In 1982, armheads finally achieved equality under the law. It was now illegal to discriminate
against armheads for any reason. Armheads across America breathed a collective sigh
of relief. They had finally achieved what they had been fighting for all these years. By 1985,
many countries across the world had followed suit. Armheads everywhere were finally free.
By 1986, despite having achieved equality, some armheads didn’t feel quite right. They
felt that the word “armhead” was being used in a derogatory way towards them
and had negative historical connotations. For this reason, they pushed for the term
‘armhead’ to be replaced with the more inclusive “Limb-diverse” terminology.
The organisation was renamed to the Limb-Diverse ARM Movement, or LDARM for short.
By the late 80s, the term ‘armhead’ fell out of favour, and was now considered taboo.
People referred to it as simply the a-word, and a campaign was run to stop people from using it.
However, some limb-diverse people, especially young folk, continued to
use the derogatory term towards each other as a form of reclamation. “Yo armhead,
what’s up?” “Just chillin’ my armhead!”. Of course, non-limb-diverse people, roundheads,
were socially forbidden from using such language. “Hey roundie! What’s up?” “All is good,
armhead!” “WHAT THE F*** DID YOU JUST CALL ME, YOU F***ING LIMBIST!” Yes, anybody who
disparagingly referred to a limb-diverse person was immediately labelled a limbist.
During the 1990s, more and more companies were
encouraging limb-diverse people to join their ranks to fight limbism.
In 2003, the first limb-diverse governor, Governor Harold Dover, was elected in the state of Vermont.
In 2006, limb-diverse people realised that there were no major hat companies
that made hats to fit people in the LDARM community. Up until this point,
limbs had to be uncomfortably tucked under people’s hat. Through a successful
nation-wide campaign, hat companies finally started producing hats with
arm holes in them. Limb-diverse people could at last show off their head limbs with pride.
In 2011, the first limb-diverse CEO was appointed to a Fortune 500 company.
In 2019, 78-year-old comedian Ronny Rambolo, known for his edgy style of comedy, got his first
Netflix special, Silent Tea. Ronny had been a huge supporter of limb-diverse people throughout his
life, and was even one of the first men to marry a limb-diverse lady. In his recent Netflix special,
he started with a fairly innocuous statement, “Back when I was a boy, the term “armhead”
was a fairly neutral term. It certainly wasn’t considered offensive…” At that point, the crowd
started booing. “He said the A-word! Get him off stage! Boo!” Thousands of complaints were sent
in by the limb-diverse community demanding that Ronny’s show be taken off the air. The following
day, Netflix complied and cancelled Ronny’s $10 million contract. His book publisher pulled out
at the last moment, and his limb-diverse wife left him, not because he said the A-word, but because
she was threatened by many of his angry fans. Ronny died of natural causes the following year.
In 2021, a politician from Nevada was interviewed about the recent spate in crime against
limb-diverse people in the state. He replied, “Um, h… Here in Nevada, limb-diverse people will always
be supported…” It sounded fairly innocuous, but people started questioning his use of the word
‘Um, h… ’. They started saying that he was actually about to use the A-word,
“Arrrm-head”, and pulled out at the last moment. This clip spread across the internet,
and people actually convinced themselves that he was actually saying the A-word on live television.
This caused a riot to break out in downtown Carson City. The politician apologised the next day for
causing any offence, but insisted that he wasn’t trying to say the A-word. But the protesters
didn’t buy it. They demanded his resignation, and he was forced to resign the following day.
In 2022, it became common for limb-diverse people to be invited to schools to perform dance routines
for the young students in the name of raising awareness of the limb-diverse community. These
dances often involved the dancers swirling their head limbs around in a fairly suggestive
way. Many parents complained that this was not appropriate for young children, but the
parents’ complaints often fell on deaf ears and were quietly ignored by the school boards.
By 2023, more and more people were identifying as limb-diverse,
even though they didn’t actually have a limb on their head. However,
the believed that they should have been born with a limb, and felt that it was
their natural state of being. Consequently, “I” was added to the acronym to represent
those people that “identified” as limb-diverse. Colloquially, they were now known as LDIARMs.
By 2025, cranial limb attachment surgery had increased by a massive 2000% since it’s
introduction one-year earlier. The LDIARM community had lobbied government to fully
fund the procedure. People who identified as limb-diverse were racing out to get arms
attached to their heads. It was quite a dangerous procedure, and many people were left permanently
injured or disabled, but the government was fully on board allowing those over the age
of 12 to have the controversial procedure. The government were convinced by the LDIARM
movement that the procedure was vital in bringing about full equality in society.
In 2026, it was found that 12% of the population now identified as limb-diverse (up from 5%).
In 2028, the first limb-diverse president was elected to the United States. 48th
U.S. President Wilson J Cooper had performed his limb-attachment surgery one year prior
and promised to “finally and conclusively” bring equality to limb-diverse Americans.
In 2029, it was found that due to the government’s decisive actions, limb-diverse
people now had more and more positions of power in large companies. Despite only representing
approximately 12% of the population, a national survey found that 52% of managers
and company leaders were now limb-diverse, or limb-diverse identifying, a massive success!
In 2030, psychologists identified a group of people, who although didn’t have a limb on their
head, they questioned whether they should, causing an identity conflict. Consequently,
“Q” was added to the acronym to represent those people that “questioned” their lack
of limb-diversity. Colloquially, they were now known as LDIQARMs.
In 2031, it was found that some people actually had a supernumerary leg on
their heads instead of an arm. Although very rare, to be completely inclusive,
the acronym was changed to LDIQLARM, with members being referred to as LDIQLegARMs.
By 2033, 62% of politicians now identified as limb-diverse and
created many more laws to protect the rights of limb-diverse people.
In 2034, psychologists identified another form of limb-diversity, supernumerary cranial phantom
limb. It’s a condition where the affected individual believes and receives sensory
information from limbs growing out of their head that do not actually exist, nor have ever existed.
The individual does not wish to attach a new limb, however, they feel as if they have a limb
attached to their head. Consequently, “P” was added to the acronym to represent those people
that had phantom limbs growing from their head. Colloquially, they were now known as LDIQPLegARMs.
Due to the new, more inclusive definition, by 2035, the limb-diverse community grew
from 12% of the population to a staggering 27% of people who were
now identifying as limb-diverse! This was the most inclusive time in history.
A 2037 report showed that despite only 27% of the population identifying as limb-diverse,
they now made up over 93% of professional employees. A remarkable 96% of university
graduates were now limb-diverse. By contrast, only 1% of blue-collar
jobs were held by limb-diverse people. This was a huge win for limb diversity!
But despite this huge success, a strange phenomenon started to occur. In 2038,
there was growing resentment towards the limb-diverse community even though they had
achieved more equality than ever before. Normal folk were becoming agitated for some reason. By
the way, in 2038, a plus symbol was added to the acronym to represent those who didn’t fit the
mainstream definition. For example, people who believed they had an extra limb growing inside
their head that wasn’t visible to others. Or others who believed that they had a limb on
their head in a previous life, but no longer do, however, they still face discrimination
because of it. Anyway, a plus symbol was added to represent these people. It was strange,
despite all this new-found equality, it was almost as if discrimination was
worse than ever before. Actually, a survey conducted worldwide in 2039 found that 83%
of roundheads had Negative, or Very Negative sentiment towards the LDIQPLARM+ community.
More and more people actively despise our movement. But why,
what is going on? We’re their doctors. We’re their lawyers. We’re their politicians. We’re their
university professors. We are one of the most successful diversity groups in history.
We’ve achieved astronomical levels of equality where we are now more equal
than anybody else in human history. Yet, it begs the question: “Why do they still hate us?”.