[tires screeching]
Just go for it.
We have a lot of rehearsing to do.
It's too dangerous, Mr. Coconuts.
I'm not getting any younger, kid.
Just count the rings in my neck.
[gasps] Okay.
- Na-na-na-na-na.
- Here goes.
[screams] [crash]
Oh, that was a close one, Mr. Coconuts.
Ah! Mr. Coconuts?
Is that you, Uncle Woody?
Your boy Coconuts is coming home.
Oh, stay with me, Mr. Coconuts, please.
Somebody call Pine-1-1.
Sorry, I couldn't resist.
No, that was good.
[coughing]
Mom, Dad, I need a ride to the wood shop!
It's an emergency!
- It wasn't my fault, Lisa.
You saw it, right? He came out of nowhere.
Uh, this hallway is full of blind spots.
How is Mr. Coconuts?
- He's out of surgery.
Dr. Ted soldered his leg back on and said
he'd be as good as new with a little sanding
and some primer.
- Oh, thank goodness.
I'm sorry for hitting him with my car, allegedly.
- There's just one problem.
Mr. Coconuts is going to be at the shop for a few days,
but we booked a party.
They're expecting a ventriloquist act,
and I don't know what to do.
Me talking like this just seems a little weird.
- Well, you've done weirder.
Anyway, I wish I could help, but I've got another glam sesh
with Mr. Grouse at 4:30.
Bye.
- [gasps] You can help me.
You can be my new dummy.
- Ha-ha, sweetie, Lola Loud is no one's dummy.
- See, you made a joke already.
You know, I wouldn't be in this situation
if you hadn't splintered Mr. C's femur
all over the hallway.
- Allegedly.
Look, how about I cover his medical bills,
up to $100?
- Huh, guess I'll just find someone else to perform
with me to a packed house.
- A packed house?
You mean, people really come to your shows?
- Yep, and this time, it would be your show,
just like your pageants.
You'd be the star.
- "You'd be the star" is my favorite sentence ever.
You got yourself a dummy.
- Boy, I sure am thirsty, Princess Sassy Pants.
- Hey!
You trying to drown me or something?
Holy mackerel, I'm no carp.
[laughter]
[cheering]
- That was incredible.
Looks like they love you.
Look at all these texts for party requests.
I've never gotten so many in one day before.
- I'm not surprised.
We slayed.
- Does this mean you might be interested in doing
these other shows with me?
- Are you kidding?
Today was such a rush--
all the applause and adulation I've been missing.
I'm totally in. Eunice, listen to this!
[cell phone ringing]
- Funny Business LLC.
You bring the money, I bring the funny.
Luan speaking.
- This is Dr. Ted at the wood shop.
I'm happy to report
Mr. Coconuts has made a full recovery
and is ready to be discharged.
- Oh, that's great news.
I'll be by to pick him up.
- And then the crowd cheered so long,
we bowed four times, Eunice, four times!
- Luan? - Oh, sorry, Dr. Ted.
I'll be by, uh, soon.
[upbeat ragtime music]
♪ ♪
- I can't believe we're headlining the Chortle Portal.
I've performed here a million times,
but I've never been the main act.
- Oh!
Let's take a selfie of us with our poster.
Oops, hang on.
My memory is full.
I just need to delete a few pictures.
[melancholy music]
♪ ♪
[groans uneasily]
♪ ♪
Since this is going to be such a big gig,
I was thinking that, instead of drinking water,
I could eat pizza and have you spit it out.
- Make it a ham and pineapple, and I won't even be acting.
Blech. [both laugh]
[both scream]
- Mr. Coconuts, how did you get home?
- Oh, hey, kiddo.
Why is it so dark in here?
I passed the wood shop on my way home
and picked up Mr. C for you.
- How thoughtful.
- Nice to see you up and about, Mr. Coconuts.
Sorry about the whole running over you thing, allegedly.
I'll leave you two to catch up.
I got to practice spitting pepperonis.
- Oh, it's great to see you, Mr. Coconuts.
How are you feeling?
Like one of Lynn's crusty socks left on the floor.
Were you ever gonna pick me up, toots?
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I've been super busy.
Oh, I know.
Your dad told me.
You and Lola are the hot new comedy team in town.
He did?
Chortle Portal, huh?
Boy, Dad sure likes to flap his gums.
Listen, I can explain.
No need to, doll.
You've hit the big time.
I'm really happy for you.
You are?
So we're good?
Good as gold, kid.