Also, I received another porno pat-down on the way. And this time, I opted out, of course,
of that scanner. I'm not into the scanner, as you know, Louis. And this time, the TSA
agent tried to bully me into just getting the scan. I said you know what? I don't want
the... I don't want the scanner. Very polite, as I always am. I show deference to these
individuals because they're working very hard and they have a tough go at it, Louis, you
know that.
Louis: I do.
David: And the woman said to me are you sure you just don't want to go through the scanner?
And I said yeah, yeah, I'm sure. It's just, it's really not my thing. And she says because,
you know, it's just, I don't... I think it would just be easier if you went through it.
And I said well, it might be easier for you, but it wouldn't be easier for me. I really
want the... I want the pat-down. Called an individual over, indicated that there was
an opt-out, and they really did not seem happy about it. I mean, it seems... I understand
that it's a pain.
Louis: Yeah, of course.
David: It slows things down incredibly. If 10% of those people going through TSA opted
for the pat-down, the entire system falls apart, ladies and gentlemen, I assure you,
because they just do not have the staff to handle these pat-downs.
Of course, you know, the armpit-tickling and the pant-shaking, it all happened pretty much
to a T the same way as last time. And the guy, of course, he was kind enough to tell
me if I would like to take things private with him, just let him know at any time, and
he'll find a private room for us to do the thing in.
And the TSA problems are continuing. I mean, now a TSA agent has been caught with a passenger's
iPad in his pants. When I think of a David Pakman Show iPad giveaway, I don't think of...
it never crosses my mind to just take it out of people's luggage at airports, but apparently
with this particular TSA agent, it did.
Louis: Yeah. And don't worry if you've won an iPad, Dave never put it in his pants. Or
at least not that I know of.
David: None of the iPads we've given away have been in my pants. And apparently 30-year-old
Nelson Santiago stole around $50,000 worth of electronics over the last six months from
Fort Lauderdale Airport. And he's been a TSA officer since 2009. He was caught earlier
in the week by a Continental Airlines employee taking an iPad out of someone's luggage and
stuffing it into his pants, which is... how do you even get a full iPad in your pants?
This guy, he must be a big guy.
Louis: Could be.
David: I mean, in other words, I... the size pants I wear, I'd be lucky to get an iPod
in there, forget about an iPad. I mean, there's no iPad going in my pants. I don't know about
you, Louis.
Louis: Yeah, it's an accomplishment, I guess.
David: A Colorado woman was also charged with groping a TSA agent's breasts. Police in Phoenix
say an airline passenger will face sexual abuse charges for allegedly, we have to say
allegedly, Louis, you know that, groping a TSA's breast.
[Ad plays]
Announcer: The new 2011 Jeep...
David: What was that, Louis?
Louis: That's an advertisement on your computer.
David: Bizarre.
Louis: Yeah.
David: Bizarre. I didn't know that they were a sponsor now. But...
Louis: Hopefully we get a nice check.
David: So yeah, I don't know. Breast-groping is not the foremost thing that comes to my
mind when I go through TSA.Yukari Mihamae, 61 years old, of Longmont, Colorado, was freed
from jail a few days ago after this alleged breast incident.
Louis: No explanation?
David: No. She faces a felony charge. Apparently she was upset. OK. Was she upset because she
wasn't allowed to continue groping, or was she upset and that caused her to grope? I
don't know, but bizarre stuff going on with the TSA these days, Louis.
Louis: As usual.
David: On today's bonus show, the bonus show is back after a hiatus during vacation, a
woman has been jailed after cutting off her husband's penis, reminiscent of the Lorena
Bobbit incident. I'm going to get... I know what my take is, I'm going to get Louis's
take on whether this is something he worries about. Louis is notoriously against sleepovers,
and I suspect, ladies and gentlemen, that it may be because he thinks while he's sleeping
there may be a violent incident like this. Louis known to create a lot of resentment
among his young lady suitors, as we know.
And Japanese scientists have also created teeth using mouse stem cells. It's abundantly
clear that we need to do more stem cell research, but the religious right's doing everything
they can to hold it back. And racists upset, Louis, that genetic research now confirms
non-Africans are part neanderthal. All of that and more on today's bonus show, www.DavidPakman.com/membership.
Back with more after this.
Announcer: The David Pakman Show at www.DavidPakman.com.
Transcript provided by Alex Wickersham and www.Subscriptorium.com. For transcripts, translations,
captions, and subtitles, or for more information, visit www.Subscriptorium.com, or contact Alex
at subscriptorium@gmail.com.