Hey everyone! Dana here.
After I put out my video on how my views of the U.S. presidential election have changed
since living here in Germany, I actually got a lot of positive feedback on this video,
and saw some comments from people expressing that they really enjoyed this kind of video
on a bit of a more serious topic.
And that they wouldn't mind seeing some more videos in the future kind of dealing with
some more "real stuff" that matters in the world.
Which to that I say: what?
Sea dogs and naked snails aren't real enough for ya?
Okay. I actually, I see your point there.
So yeah, I would definitely be up for making some more videos on kind of "real stuff."
Not all the time. Don't worry. I love making the fun videos.
The fun videos are not going anywhere. No worry about that.
But just from time to time, it would be interesting to delve a little deeper into
something a little bit more serious.
But here's the thing that concerns me.
When I make videos about naked snails and cultural differences that I've noticed at
the supermarket, the big key thing here is "that I've noticed."
You know, these are experiences that I have experienced in Germany and the U.S.
and I have noticed these differences. I've lived them.
And even then, even though these are just my experiences that I've lived, you know I
can't really do anything about them, um, sometimes...or actually quite often, I look down in the comments
and there are good bit of comments down there that are just very, very angry and upset about
what I said.
Even though a lot of the time it's, it's just what I've experienced.
And I just think: wow. If that's how upset people are getting
over Pfand and having to pay to use the toilets,
then my goodness, if I start talking about more serious topics then people's heads are
just going to explode!
And I don't want to make people's heads explode!
If people are so angry and they've got, you know, heads exploding, then I don't think
that they are sitting there openly and thoughtfully listening to the ideas.
Whatever it is I'm talking about.
I don't think that they are actually, really giving those ideas any kind of a chance.
And, yeah, maybe the person's just having a bad day.
But I think that there's something that gets in the way.
There's a feeling there, a very basic feeling.
An often almost automatic tendency for humans to get defensive.
Get defensive!
There's somebody talking bad about my country!
Someone's criticizing my country!
Who is she to criticize my country?
My country that, you know, I grew up in and I love and I respect so much.
Arrrhgggh, head explode.
And I get it.
I totally get it.
Which is why I don't just say, like, nah I don't care about these comments from these haters.
No, I totally get it. These people aren't haters.
I mean, maybe some of them are, but I think for a lot of these comments, it's simply people
responding to, as I said, this often almost automatic, um, tendency to get defensive when
you feel like someone is questioning the way that you have done something your entire life.
Or you feel like they're seeing your country incorrectly.
And I get this because when I first moved to Germany, you know people in Germany
can be a little direct.
They just say whatever it is they think.
Their opinion, they just say it.
And my first two years in Germany, I heard a lot of opinions about the U.S. that I had
never heard before.
Or opinions that I'd certainly never before heard from someone who wasn't an American.
From someone who hadn't grown up in the U.S.
Who didn't have that same kind of connection to the country as I did.
And I'll be honest, I did have to work hard to overcome that tendency to immediately get defensive.
Because of all those experiences that I'd had in this place and all of those things
that that place meant to me emotionally -- the country that I had grown up in, the country
where all my loved ones live, and the country that had made me who I was today, the country
where my favorite foods were, and the country where all of my childhood memories took place.
It was very hard for me to think about that country rationally.
Because it just, in my heart and in my brain it was a very emotional feeling.
I had to dig deep within myself and come to realize that these criticisms were not criticisms
of me or my loved ones or my favorite childhood memories.
These were criticisms of the country.
And once I was able to kind of get past all that other stuff, I could see that some of
them were quite valid criticisms at that.
And I hadn't been able to see that; I hadn't even been able to give the criticisms any
kind of honest deliberation or open thoughtfulness when I had been too busy
getting and being defensive.
So what I want to say with all of this is: first of all, I get it.
I get the feeling of being defensive.
But at the same time, I would love from time to time to make some videos looking at
the U.S. and Germany or maybe even through some other countries in there and kind of look at
what is perhaps done better in the U.S. than in Germany, maybe what's done better
in Germany than in the U.S.
You don't have to agree with what I say in the end.
Definitely not. That's not what I'm looking for.
I'm actually really excited and looking forward to having my own views broadened from the
thoughtful discussion down in the comments.
But in order to get to that place, everyone has to really try and be willing to put the defensiveness
to the side and really give honest consideration to the different ideas.
And I know it's not easy!
But if not...I mean, come on, the alternative is simply: grrr head explodes, angry comment!
Angry comments don't do anything to move the conversation forward.
They just don't.
And no, this is not the case that, you know, one side is only to blame for this and not
the other side.
I get these comment, these kind of angry comments from the U.S. and from Germany.
From people in Germany, for example, the comments usually look something like: you have no idea
what you're talking about.
Go back to whatever country you're from, wherever you're from.
We don't want you here.
And that one just makes me laugh because it's like, go back to wherever you're from...they
don't even take the time to figure out where I'm from.
Just wherever you're from, we don't want you, go back there.
And I can understand the feelings that produce those comments.
I guess it's like if you make fun of your brother, well that's okay, that's allowed.
But if someone else, outside of the family dares to make fun of your brother, or criticize
your brother in any way, then oh man, you're going to be pissed at that person.
But the thing is here that, you know, Germany is not a brother.
Germany is a country.
And as I've learned, sometimes it can really be interesting and eye-opening to get an outside
perspective on how things are done in your country.
And from my fellow Americans, the comments are often something like: we don't want you
here anymore anyway.
Don't ever come back to the U.S.
You don't belong here anymore.
All you people who move abroad are the same.
You move abroad and then you just hate your country.
Talk about being ungrateful.
And to that I'm always like, whoa whoa. Ungrateful? Hate my country?
I want to make the country that I grew up in better.
That's how much I care about the U.S.
And if to do that, that means going out and seeing how other people are doing things and
then offering those ideas as possible solutions to make things better, I think that that's fine.
In fact, I think that that's a really good idea.
And lastly, with these videos about more "real" stuff, you know, a lot of times these won't
be videos about things that I have experienced first-hand.
Sometimes it will be things that I'm just learning about or thing that I've experienced
a little bit how they're done in Germany and a little bit how they're done in the U.S.,
but I won't necessarily be an expert on the subject when I make the video.
But I'll share with you what I've learned about it on both sides, and maybe together
we can make sense of it all.
And as I said in the election video, yes I definitely misunderstand things too sometimes.
Or, you know, I haven't been to every place in the U.S. or every place in Germany, so
I might not always have a full and complete picture of how it's done everywhere.
So I'm very happy when people let me know about that in the comments, as long as the
comment comes from a place of kindness and being informative rather than just, you know,
straight to anger.
So my question for you is: What do you think of all of this?
Have you ever found yourself reacting defensively to something, and how did you
kind of channel that so that you didn't have that reaction?
And also what are some of the "real" topics that you'd like to see me discuss in some videos?
Please let me know in the comments below.
Thanks so much for watching.
I really hope that you enjoyed this video.
I can't wait to hear what you think in the comments about all this.
If you like what I do and you're not subscribed to the channel yet, please don't forget to
subscribe for more videos, and also, oh, there should be another video up there that you
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Until next time, auf Wiedersehen!
Is that better?
Or kind of questions...no.
Blablablablabla. But yeah.
I mean...I don't have anything to say.
After I put out the video on how my views have changed
on...the...presidential...election...in...the...U.S. Ding.