Dried melon jerky and a food that smells like vomit.
These are no-goes next time you go to Trader Joe's.
Trader Joe's Everything But the Bagel seasoning blend has quite the fanbase.
It was introduced in 2017, and it was once voted as the best item available at TJ's.
So the logical conclusion would be to sprinkle it on everything, right?
But in the case of the Everything But the Bagel Seasoned Kettle-cooked potato chips,
two rights have somehow made a wrong.
It sounded like a recipe for success, but many customers wound up disappointed.
One person commented on Reddit that they threw away their bag after everyone refused to eat
them, while another noted that they were too sweet.
And one comment summed up the general consensus: love the seasoning, hate the chips.
"Don't hate the player, hate the game, son."
Everything But the Bagel isn't Trader Joe's only seasoning, of course.
And while there are plenty of hits, there are also some occasional misses, including
the cheesy seasoning blend.
On paper, it sounds like a genius idea.
You can add cheese to any dish you want.
Alas, it somehow wasn't a good idea in this case.
Many customers have gone online to voice their initial excitement to try the seasoning that
then quickly faded upon the first taste.
Some people pointed out that the blend didn't even taste like cheese.
The Trader Joe's Reviews Instagram account noted that the primary flavors were garlic,
onion, and rosemary.
Last time we checked, none of those are cheese.
If you're curious and still want to try this cheesy seasoning blend for yourself, remember
that the flavor you're probably anticipating may not be what you ultimately taste.
If you've committed yourself to the Trader Joe's lifestyle, then you probably had high
hopes about the gluten-free Joe Joe's chocolate and vanilla creme cookies.
It's TJ's version of the classic Oreo, so what could be better?
But ultimately it just doesn't measure up.
One customer who actually happened to prefer Joe Joe's to Oreos reached out on Reddit to
see if they could find any like-minded customers.
But instead, the thread filled up with those who were in fact let down by Joe Joe's.
TJ's also sells a variety of seasonal Joe Joe's cookies, including a Halloween version,
a pumpkin spiced flavor for fall, and a candy cane variety during the holidays.
Someone who actually liked the original cookie left a comment on Trader Joe's Reviews to
say that they were horrified by the autumnal edition.
Overnight oats are a convenient breakfast to start your day.
You can soak your own at home, or you can opt for the convenience of a premade version.
Trader Joe's sells vanilla overnight oats, which you can usually find with other prepared
foods in the refrigerated section.
Alas, there's a Reddit thread about Trader Joe's products to never purchase again that
kicks off with one person tearing down the overnight oats.
As it turns out, the taste is bad, and the price is a sticking point.
One small cup costs $1.99, but since you're only getting 5.5 ounces, it's not that great
a deal.
Your time and money is better spent buying a bag of rolled oats and making it yourself.
One Trader Joe's item that seems to be universally disliked is the frozen beef pho soup.
It was, in fact, one of the most mentioned items in a Reddit thread about the worst products
at the store.
One customer declared it "unsalvageable," despite adding various spices and seasonings
to enhance the dish.
Ultimately, TJ's customers love pho, but this frozen version is a huge letdown that misses
the mark on what makes this soup so tasty in the first place.
Across the board, it seems like plenty of customers would love to find a quick and easy
frozen option, but this one simply doesn't meet their standards.
If you follow a gluten-free diet or are looking for healthy substitutes for your favorite
cheat meals, chances are you're already familiar with cauliflower pizza crusts.
They're offered at multiple major grocery chains, including Costco, Aldi, and as you
might expect, Trader Joe's.
TJ's version is tasty enough, but it's a bit of a letdown nutritionally.
People tend to turn to cauliflower substitutions when they're seeking healthy alternatives
to gluten and wheat flour.
But a glance at the nutritional facts tells a different story in this case.
According to the packaging, one-sixth of the crust, or roughly one slice, contains 17 grams
of carbohydrates.
With an ingredient list that includes corn flour, cornstarch, and potato starch, some
customers feel a bit slighted by what they thought would be a low-carb option.
"Is butter a carb?"
There are tons of ways to dress up a basic bowl of pasta, from classic red sauces to
a simple drizzle of melted butter.
For something a little different, you can turn to vodka sauce for a unique flavor.
So if you come across a jar of premade vodka sauce at Trader Joe's, it's natural that you'd
feel tempted to add it to your weekly lineup of meals.
But TJ's customers are divided over this sauce.
Some love the flavor, while others think it's more like a basic marinara rather than vodka sauce.
One Reddit thread mentioned that the flavor was boring and closely resembled a run-of-the-mill
red sauce that needed some heavy seasoning in order to liven up the taste.
Some comments on Instagram mentioned its bland taste, with one person declaring it "barely
vodka sauce."
So is it a decent jar of red sauce?
Perhaps.
But is it actually vodka sauce?
That seems to be up for debate.
So if you're looking for that distinct vodka sauce flavor, you're probably better off making
it yourself from scratch.
Every once in a while, you might come across a grocery item that sounds so unique that
you figure it must be an undiscovered gem.
After all, why would any company go through the trouble of making something so wild if
it doesn't taste good?
The dried fruit craze has reached nearly every fruit imaginable.
But while some dried fruits are common, others require a little more heavy lifting to convince
shoppers that they're worth a try, which brings us to the unique selection of watermelon jerky.
Dried fruit can be a healthy snack, but that didn't matter to one customer on Reddit who
called Trader Joe's watermelon jerky "an abomination to anything called jerky."
Another opined that it wouldn't be so bad if the bag weren't filled with crunchy black seeds.
And still another went so far as to describe the jerky as "solidified garbage juice."
Ranch dressing should be a safe bet for anyone who likes it on salad or as a dip.
It's so popular and so commonplace that it shouldn't be hard to mess up.
But somehow Trader Joe's did mess it up.
"You done messed up, A-A-Ron!"
Trader Joe's sells a large assortment of unique dressings and sauces, and its organic ranch
is one of the most divisive.
One person on Reddit declared it to be "inedible," while another was surprised that it wasn't
the top answer to a thread about the worst product offered at TJ's.
Simply put, you can find much better versions of ranch at pretty much any other supermarket.
The freezer section at Trader Joe's is often where you'll find the most original and tastiest items.
At first glance, the honey walnut shrimp might sound like a delicious option, so you may
quickly find yourself tossing a couple of bags into your shopping cart for an easy dinner.
But as it turns out, you should actually stay far away from these shrimp.
As usual, it's worth consulting Reddit threads to see what other customers thought.
One comment describes the shrimp as "awful," while adding,
Another commenter noted that they usually love walnut shrimp, but Trader Joe's version
didn't measure up because it was "too sweet and goopy."
However, this might not be a completely lost cause, as one other customer recommended adding
Sriracha chili garlic sauce to enhance the flavor.
Trader Joe's excels in a few categories, especially its butters and spreads.
Most of their nut butters have a passionate following, as evidenced by a Reddit thread
filled with words of praise for seemingly every variety they offer.
For fans of the almond butter, excitement was surely high when TJ's rolled out their
almond butter puffs cereal.
Despite the company's claims that almond butter makes up 40 percent of the recipe, one customer
insisted on Reddit that they wouldn't have been able to tell that was the predominant
flavor in a blind taste test.
Several commenters were similarly underwhelmed, with many pointing out that the cereal is
so hard and crunchy that they initially thought it was stale.
Another Reddit thread highlighting the stale consistency included many comments from customers
who were excited to try what seemed to be an almond butter version of Reese's Puffs,
only to be sorely let down.
"I'm not mad.
I'm just disappointed."
If you hail from the American Northeast, then you probably have very strong opinions about
apple cider.
A fall staple in many households, it should have a distinct fresh flavor that you won't
find in any garden-variety bottle of processed apple juice.
Depending on where you live, you may find that your local Trader Joe's sells fresh apple
cider in its refrigerated section.
But nationwide, you're more likely to come across its shelf-stable spiced apple cider.
It comes with a laundry list of ingredients, including spices like allspice, cinnamon,
and cloves.
Many customers who tried it were quick to point out on Reddit that the addition of these
flavors took away from the apple-forward aromas that cider fans expect to taste.
While TJ's spiced apple cider may offer something different than regular apple juice, the unique
flavor you find in fresh apple cider is missing from this shelf-stable version.
The majority of the commenters on Reddit preferred fresh cider to the spiced version, with one
simply calling the latter "trash."
Long story short: spiced apple cider might be a step up from apple juice, but it pales
in comparison to any fresh variety.
There are few food groups more universally beloved than melted cheese.
So whenever there's an opportunity to pick up a jar of queso, consumers naturally jump
on it at lightning speed.
With that in mind, we can certainly understand if your expectations are sky high when you
come across the queso cheese dip at Trader Joe's.
Alas, get ready for those expectations to be dashed.
A review from the "What's Good at Trader Joe's" blog dings the cheese dip on both texture
and taste, pointing out that heating it up is an absolute must in order to be able to
somewhat enjoy it.
One person on Reddit wondered how anyone could think it's tasty when it contains zero grams
of fat, while another simply called it "disappointment in a jar."
Others criticized the dip for tasting too vinegary, which probably has something to
do with apple cider vinegar being one of the ingredients.
Another disappointing category of Trader Joe's items isn't actually a type of food.
Just like any other grocery store, TJ's also sells inedible household products, including
paper items like toilet paper and paper towels.
While it may be tempting to make Trader Joe's a one-stop shop and pick up a few rolls of
paper towels while you're there, we caution against it.
When asked about the worst product at Trader Joe's, one comment on Reddit noted that the
paper towels are worse than any food item, claiming that they basically dissolve the
moment they come into contact with water.
Another commenter warned users to avoid even touching the paper towels with wet fingers,
or they will immediately disintegrate.
And the toilet paper is just as bad, according to these reviews.
"I demand TP!
I demand TP!"
Some consumers, however, insist that the paper towels are decent quality for the price and
that they're comparable to many other store brands.
You'll ultimately have to decide whether it's worth the gamble yourself.