I don’t know what they’re dancing about.
Considering that their habitat is melting at a rate of about 24 cubic miles a year,
you’d think these guys would spend just a little more time migrating to solid ground,
learning to thin out their plumage and pondering how to accelerate their evolution toward flight...than
dancing.
I’m sorry.
Is this a global tragedy or a **** music video?
In fact, what this is is another mediocre video game based on a movie.
In this case, a sequel to the 2006 film Happy Feet.
That movie was about an ugly CGI penguin with a strange love for dancing, despite its species
having little to no chance of surviving the next 200 years.
Like I said, there’s nothing to be happy about if you’re a penguin.
But that’s not why this game is so mediocre.
And keep in mind, there’s a difference between “mediocre” and “sucks.”
Happy Feet Two doesn’t suck, but it is exceedingly mediocre...a difference that, while largely
semantic, does pertain to the quality.
This game isn’t going to be interesting for anyone over the age of eleven, but if
you’re younger than that...
Wait, if you’re younger than that, why are you watching this channel?
Do your parents know you’re watching this?
You know, I make horribly off-color comments at times.
I guess Happy Feet Two is best described as a generic 3D version of a game like Lemmings,
in a sense.
Playing as a penguin, you peruse your ticking time bomb of a habitat in search of other
penguins.
Your objective is to get them to follow you, like a cult leader or something.
I don’t know.
If the penguins killed themselves, this game might be interesting.
So you have to get a certain amount of penguins to the end of the level.
Since you actually walk right by them on your way, it’s almost impossible not to find
them.
The word “find” isn’t even applicable here, actually.
It’s like you’re just walking down the penguin aisle at the grocery store.
“Hey, there they are.
I’ll take seven.”
The catch is that the penguins won’t join your cult unless you brainwash them with Satanic
dancing moves.
You do that by tapping the directional pad in rhythm with this flashing...thing.
Then you dance around and smash these glaciers.
Yeah, real smart, penguins.
If I were you, I’d be stockpiling every **** glacier I could find.
So the game is what it is.
It’s a boring kids game with level design and gameplay so simple, it virtually plays
itself.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with it.
It’s just one of those games I literally have nothing to say about.
I just can’t discern any qualities to even comment on.
You play it, it happens, and then you turn it off.
If you want to shut your kids up, Happy Feet Two may do the trick.