Hi. A huge fan.
Oh, thanks. Huge fan
of all of you. Well, thanks for coming
on the program. I think you're great, yes.
I hope you didn't see the late night orgy.
I did, it was a little disturbing.
Yeah, well. Yes.
That's kind of what we do here
And I'm sad that I was not invited.
Nah, I'm kidding, I'm kidding, it's a joke,
it's a joke. I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
Hi. Let me start
by just the pleasantries here.
I don't know what to call you.
Do you go by Jennifer?
Love
Jennifer? Wait, do you go by Jennifer
or Jennifer Love?
Just Love
You go by love? Love, yes.
I'd go by love too. (Jennifer laughs)
Do people call you love?
Yeah.
That's great because people can't really yell
at someone named love. (Jennifer laughs)
You know what I mean? They are very...
I'll get you Love! Oh.
I'm so mad at you, Love. Oh.
(Jennifer laughs)
You know what's funny,
is that the three name thing I've noticed
is so big. Yeah.
It's a real trend, there's you.
You're Jennifer Love Hewitt.
You have your Sarah Michelle Gellar.
You have your Jonathan Taylor Thomas.
You have your Melissa Joan Hart.
Your Lee Harvey Oswald. (audience laughs)
It used to be something that was restricted
to like assassins, and killers, and stuff.
Melissa Joan Hart was seen fleeing on foot.
But no, it's now, is it intentional, why is this happening?
I have no idea, I don't know.
I guess it's just one big coinkydink.
What is your middle name? Christopher.
Christopher. Yeah.
It doesn't really roll off the tongue.
Sure it does.
Well, no one would ever get to it,
because Conan weirded them out so much,
they never would get to the
"What's your name?"
"Well, it's Conan Christo..." "What?"
"Where's your sword?"
No, leave me alone. (audience cheers)
Okay, so
(audience cheering)
That was my whole experience growing up,
"Where's your sword"?
Quit pushing me, stop it.
So, okay,
I have to explain something. Yes.
I still know what you did last summer,
you were right the second time.
He still knows that we tried to throw him off the boat
and kill him.
The previous summer. Right.
Has he completely okay with what happened two summers ago?
Yes. So he's over that now.
So then He's got the scar, it's fine
now he's moved on.
The real title then should be,
I still know what you did last summer,
if you worry about what happened the previous summer,
Forget it. I'm okay with it.
It's all right. Basically.
We'll let it slide. Basically.
You've had so much success at such a young age,
you didn't go to, you know, school
the way the rest of us did. Right.
You took, was it a correspondence course,
Yeah. or what was it?
It was a correspondence, a home study program
that I did either at work or at home,
and that's how I did school.
So you'd miss out on a graduation or a ceremony?
No, we had a graduation.
So you all met, you met the other people in your class
just only on graduation day. We had three hours
to get to know each other before we graduated
and did the big hug and cry thing about,
"yeah we're out of high school," you know,
so we showed up, and we all had to sit
in a big circle and introduce ourselves.
And there was this one girl,
and she was coming to New York
to study to be the this famous ballerina.
And there was this guy's like, "yeah"
"I am playing a symphony at two."
and all of this these amazing things.
And they came to me and I was like,
"Hey, I play Sarah on party of five." Yeah.
I was the big looser. And they sound
like the kind of people weren't watching
a lot of TV. right
Any guy that was playing piano in the womb
is probably not, you know,
"I know the show very well."
I was a big loser.
Were there types?
I mean, you missed out on like yearbook editor.
Oh, we had a girl named Christina who was a doll.
Absolutely the sweetest person on earth,
but was taking pictures all day,
and she was going to put together a yearbook,
which none of us ever received,
because I'm sure she only had like four pictures
of these weird people going... (awkwardly laughs)
That's weird, she just decided in a day,
I'm gonna be the yearbook editor?
Yeah, and then we, She took
a lot of pictures of you. She did.
I'm saving these because I know what you did last summer.
She was really sweet
but she was really into the yearbook thing
and we never received the yearbook,
or pictures, or anything, so I don't know what happened.
So pretty much, if you're in a conversation
with other people who went to high school,
your only frame of reference would be saved by the bell.
You know? I loved saved by the bell.
Really? Yeah.
You do too, I heard.
That's enough, we don't have to do that.
There's no... Really?
I used to watch saved by the bell when I lived
out in Los Angeles Really?
And became a big Screech fan.
Yes? (Jennifer laughs)
This would be our last episode ever.
You can't, guys, can't go around saying big screech fan.
That Dustin Diamond rocks. (audience laughs)
You see, that's his real name. (audience laughs)
You know, I've been watching (laughs)
Andy! Dustin Diamond, who is that?
Oh, that's Screech, okay. Screech, yeah.
I'm helping them out, Andy.
Now you're in these movies, you're quite athletic.
You look pretty tough, like you can fight.
Can you, have you had any training?
I did kickboxing for a little while
and then, I trained a little bit before the movies
so that I would look like I knew what I was doing,
but I am obviously pretty weenie, so.
That's not, I mean, you look in the movies
and it looks like you know how to move.
Thanks. Like you know how to,
I think that would make it as intimidating
as it would be for a lot of guys
to say, try and go out with you, or be your boyfriend
then to know that you could also maybe kick their ass
would make it even more difficult.
Do you recall, would you only go out with someone
who is like, you know, physically bigger and stronger?
Or would you go out with a complete wimpy guy?
Who, you could be up in a fight.
They don't have to, I mean,
they don't have to have big muscles or anything like that.
I mean, it's what's But what if anytime
you throw them a tennis ball, they're like (whines)
That's not going to do, no. Okay.
I like a guy to be (laughs) So I'm out. (laughs)
Tell us, I want to talk about your scrape with the law
because I'm doing research on you,
and I found that you had scrape with the law,
and it wasn't too specific.
And I'm thinking, "What, her?"
You know, she looks like someone
who would have no problems at all.
Law-abiding. (Jennifer laughs)
All right. (laughs)
When I was 14,
"I murdered somebody" (laughs)
Okay, here's the thing. Okay.
We were driving our car And then someone else
walked in, and I had to get them.
Then I had to set the place on fire,
so the bodies would burn.
No, when I was 14, I went with a boy to Mulholland,
and we were making out. Mulholland is the big street
that goes... Mulholland Drive. Yeah.
And we were kissing and making out,
but it was really cold outside,
so we had the heater on.
So the windows, got all fogged,
and so the police thought that there was something wrong
going on in the car.
So they knocked on the window, and I was like,
"oh my God, I'm begging God, the police are here."
And I completely freaked out.
And I was more worried about them taking me home
to say that I had made out, You can't
That I was making out to my mother.
You can't get arrested for making out.
I didn't know! I was 14,
I was like "Oh my God, I'm going to jail,
I've been making out, I've done a terrible thing,
(audience laughs) Life is over."
I'm just amazed that you were making out at 14.
For me, that's, you know. I mean, it wasn't like
really making out. When I was like 22
I was still like (groans), where are you going?
(groans loudly) "Who needs you?"
I wasn't really making out, though.
I've got my Rubik's cube. It was like making out at 14
You weren't really, okay.
I wasn't making out, yeah. Oh, okay. We don't have to,
Look, that's your life. All right.
And I respect the boundaries. (knocks on imaginary door)
There's a boundary here,
There's your personal life; there's me.
And, dink dink dink. (Jennifer laughs)
The boundary is all fogged up.
Thank you very much. You lousy, all right.
It's a very silly show tonight,
our apologies to our affiliates.
Who were already mad about that piece.
You're doing so much right now,
You're hosting Saturday Night Live,
This Saturday with musical guests, the Beastie Boys
which I think that's just a great show.
I got to meet them today. Oh really?
They are so cool. I've never met them,
they're on the short list of people
that I would just like to say hi to from afar.
They're amazing. But, ah,
they have good security. (audience laughs)
I still know what you did last summer,
which is out everywhere, and that has a soundtrack
that features your single, How Do I Deal.
Right. So you're doing everything.
Yes. That's pretty cool.
Well, thanks for making time for us.
Thank you so much again, I am a big fan. Thank you.
Yeah, really great to have you here.
Jennifer Love Hewitt everybody (audience cheers)