[screeching]
Ow!
Sweet mother of Aphrodite. Please make it end!
Huh? Huh? Are you enjoying the music so far?
It's delightful.
Bravo. Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! [whistling]
[clapping]
Encore! Encore! Yes, yes! Bravo! Bravo!
[humming]
This is Squidward, the cashier.
[screaming]
And yes, those moles are huge.
Amazing.
And stay out!
[groaning, thudding]
[grumbling, thudding]
Hello, gentlemen, and welcome to the Chum Bucket.
Would you like seating inside or outside?
Seating for what?
For the Chum Bucket,
where you can enjoy a nice helping of chum.
Oh, boy. This is so...
Good. The chum is.
Wait a minute, eating, chum, do people do that?
Look, are you going to eat or not?!
Yeah, I'm going to have two Krabby Patties.
Oh, yeah, dude.
We couldn't find parking over there at the Krusty Krab.
Ah.
Now, what was I saying? Oh, right.
Jellyfishing. Jellyfishing. Jellyfishing. Jellyfishing.
This is Jellyfish Fields where wild jellyfish roam
just waiting to be captured.
[buzzing]
No, no, Squid, over here.
Now, I know you're eager,
but you don't even have your net.
Patrick, fix him up
while I find him a good specimen.
Firmly grasp it in your hand.
Firmly grasp it.
Firmly grasp it!
[groaning]
That oughta do it.
What do you think of the new window?
We got it from the Krusty Krab.
SpongeBob, how do you expect me
to see out of a window that high?
I guess I hadn't thought about that.
I did. Look, Plankton,
it's the perfect height for your kind.
See, SpongeBob? Patrick's using the old noggin.
He knows I'll actually want to see out the window.
Wait, you wanted to see out the window? Weird.
[growling]
Uh...
[growling, grunting]
Can't you two do anything right?!
I give you one simple task after another and...
Just forget it.
What's going on out here?!
We're playing with our new reef blowers.
Playing with a reef blower?
That is the most childish thing I've ever heard of.
But it's fun.
Fun? How could playing with one
of those oversized hair dryers possibly be fun?
Like this.
[reef blower sucking]
[grunting]
Chafed.
All right, that's-!
[reef blower sucking]
Let's do your house, Patrick.
Yeah. Huh?
Squidward, you're steaming.
You're like a steamed vegetable, only smarter.
Wait a minute. What's this? Karen? My own wife?
Oh, how Krabs bugs me!
Hi, honey.
What's that, a souvenir from your boyfriend, Krabs?!
Oh, pipe down. I just went to get you
this Happy Hero box.
Wha? Thanks, babe. You're too good to me.
I was here first.
- No, I was. - One at a time, please.
Oh, Mr. Tentacles, it's so nice to finally meet you.
Yes. Isn't it? Next. Whoa! Plankton!
Yeah? What's up?
Are you not seeing the line of people out there?
What's the hold up with that new batch
of Fricassee?
What's the hold up? You said it took exactly 24 hours.
[ticking]
I don't care if it isn't finished,
just take the orders.
But I haven't even sauteed it yet.
[gasping]
The safe. I'm in the clear, baby.
[music playing]
It's beautiful. No. No tears.
Not yet. There's work to be done.
[music playing]
Haha. At long last.
[applauding]
And the secret formula is... one bottle of molting lotion,
take passport photo, get new safe (travel size).
This isn't the secret formula. It's a to do list.
[screaming]
[growling]
[thudding, grunting]
Are you okay?
[stammering]
It's such a nightmare.
Squidward, what are you trying to say, buddy?
[coughing]
I tried to get my clarinet in there.
It's impossible.
Clari- Oh, you mean this.
[gasping] Where did you get that?
Well, with all the ruckus you were making over it,
I kept it with me just to make sure it was safe.
[growling]
Call it a friendly gesture.
I'll show you a friendly gesture!
Do you know the horror I've endured?!
Let's see how you look at!
[thudding]
[dinging]
35 left, 25 right, and finally four left.
Open says me. Hey, what gives?
I was looking right at the combination.
Why isn't it an opening?
[grunting, screaming]
What's going on in here? Hmm.
Everything seems to be in order. The safe is still safe.
Heh. I must be hearing things.
Hey, how'd that pickle get on the floor?
Now, what was that rule about dropped food?
Was it 5 seconds or 5 minutes or...
Oh, well, waste not, want not.
Plankton, where have you been?
Trust me, you do not want to know.
Did you get the Krabby Patty formula?
Like I have to ask.
No, and I probably never will.
Go! Go, team, go!
[laughing]
Go, team, go!
[chuckles] My shorts are wet.
Fight team, fight! Fight team, fight!
Fight, team, fight!
Eat at the Chum Bucket or parish.
[laughing]
♪ Krusty Krab, the Krusty Krab Eat at the Krusty Krab ♪
No! My show!
[whimpering]
You seem tense.
Cut it out. That's it! Everyone out!
Just tell me if I should permanently upload
the screensaver.
I said not now.
[thudding]
[groaning]
Sample is 100% big jerk.
I have also analyzed your screensaver, Karen.
It is most beautiful.
No one asked you.
Are you happy now, Karen?!
No I'm not.
I was just trying to make myself pretty for you.
But do you even care?
All you ever do is make stupid schemes
about stupid sandwiches.
Stupid?
Your new screensaver is stupid
and it makes your processor look fat!
What?!
Okay, let's all calm down
before you say something you'll regret.
Hold it right there, Mr. Tentacles.
Stay back, I got gardening tools.
Here, just read this.
What is it?
A well thought out
and organized list of complaints.
[clamoring]
Patrick, look, it's Squidward.
Squidward, we finally found you.
Get off me. I'm not Squidward.
Are you Squidward now?
Grievances? This town is a grievance.
There should be a law against
so many stuck up tightwads living in one place!
This city needs to be destroyed!
Or at least painted a different color.
F.Y.I. You don't have to live here, you know.
Hey, you're right, and I'm leaving ASAP.
- Are you Squidward? - No.
Are you Squidward? That's okay. Take your time.
Any one of these Squidwards could be
the real Squidward, Patrick.
[rumbling]
Freedom! Whoo-hoo!
[laughing]
Well, we know one thing. It sure isn't that guy.
Why don't you whip us up a couple of Krabby Patties?
Mm. I'm kinda in the mood for tacos.
[chuckles] Good one, SpongeBob, but really,
why don't you go ahead and make us a patty?
[yawning]
Nah, I don't really feel like it.
But I don't understand.
You have the grill and the spatula
and the comfy chair. I rubbed your putrid feet.
Tell you what, half-pint, why don't you ask me later?
I command you to make me a patty this instant!
No.
Don't back sass me.
[mocking]
What?!
That's it, mister,
you just lost your brain privileges!
Finished. SpongeBob, come in here.
[chuckles]
Or should I say RobotBob SpongeChefPants?
I put the brain in the robot, you know.
You shouldn't have been a spoiled brat.
You see, I always get what I want,
and I want you to make me a Krabby Patty!
Dee-dee-doodle-dee-dee-doo!
Response: Why don't you ask me later?
What? What?!
Get welded.
Wait! I command you make me a Krabby Patty!
I don't wanna.
[screaming]
What are you two doing in my house?
We're checking to make sure this guy really is
a certified foot masseur and not some kind of assassin.
Well, I say he checks out A-okay.
Squidward, have you ever seen more lovely French tips?
French tips, huh?
All right, pal,
make with a relaxing foot massage pronto!
Uh-oh. Uh, sorry, your hour's up.
All right, you two, out!
I'd like you to meet my computer wife, Karen.
Golly, she sure is purty, Sheldon.
Sheldon?
Yes, that's my first name.
[laughing]
- Sheldon? - Will you please?
- Sorry. Sorry. - All right, as I was saying-
[laughing]
Okay, we all know Sheldon's a funny name.
Okay, okay. I'm done. No more.
Good. To continue. Only you can bring honor...
[laughing]
...and dignity...
[laughing]
...back to the Plankton-
[laughing]
For years it has been my goal [laughing]
to acquire the secret formula [laughing]
for- Aha!
Okay, that's enough!
Sheldon. [laughing]
Bottom line, we invade the Krusty Krab
so I can steal the secret formula.
What do you think?
Ahem.
Who said that?
Down here! I am just an innocent passerby
who felt the need to stop and tell you
what a magnificent garden you have.
- Oh, really? - Yes.
Well, let me tell you something, mister.
I know exactly who you are and why you're here.
You do?
You will not get me to eat at the Chum Bucket,
no matter how big the discount is.
Well, that's not exactly why I-
A customer?
Our special today is Chum... balaya.
Hi, Mr. Plankton.
Haven't you degraded me enough for one day?
No. I mean, I want you to come out and play with me.
Wha?
Play with me.
You know how to induce thermonuclear fusion?
No, but I like to go jelly...
That naive cube. How long must I suffer this?
You're not letting him leave, are you?
Can't you see this is the perfect opportunity
- for revenge? - Elaborate.
Befriend the SpongeBob.
Then, when the timing is just right,
take the Krabby Patty.
Take the Krabby Patty.
Get moving, genius. Don't let him get away.
...fishing with my friends in Jellyfish Fields.
All right, SpongeBob, I'll play your little game.
Great.
What a beautiful day.
And here I am, trapped in a prison of high cholesterol.
No one ever comes in on Sunday.
Why can't Mr. Krabs just let us go home?
Oh!
[dinging, giggling]
SpongeBob, stop ringing this bell!
I was just testing it.
I will ring the bell when there's an order.
But there's no customers!
There hasn't been one all day and there isn't going to be any!
[dinging]
One Krabby Patty coming up.
Oh!
Come to Papa! Oh, boy.
Well, this stinks.
Well, patty, I guess we can go home now.
SpongeBob, that's my Krabby Patty!
Give it back, you porous freak! I command you! My patty!
No!
I'll settle for some fries.
Whatcha doing?
I'm busy.
How busy would you say you are on a scale of eight to nine?
14.
Squidward, I'm no mathmatologist,
but that seems like a lot.
It is!
Okay. Quick survey.
Are you "busy busy" or just busy?
What's "busy busy"?
No, no, no, don't tell me, don't tell me.
Don't tell me anything.
Don't even tell me what you're doing here.
I found a jump rope.
I said not to tell me!
You're ruining my perfect afternoon.
I'm spending some quality time
with someone who is very important to me.
Oh, who's the lucky-
You'll never catch me, ya here?! Never!
We've got you surrounded.
You do?
Oh, we've received hundreds of reports
of an excruciating musical disturbance.
And you're the only one holding an instrument.
Wait a minute. I've never seen this instrument
before in my life.
He's right, officer. Plankton doesn't even play cl-
Hey there, ladde.
Just let the legal system run its course.
Watch your head.
No! Wait! Please! Karen! Help!
Oh, you won't be needing this where you're going.
[sirens blaring]
Boy, that was a close one, huh, Squidward?
He almost got your clarinet.
Once again, I hate people.