-Let's get your prediction on who will win the series.
-Yankees in 6!
-Wow. How about that?
[ Cheers and applause ]
That's great. That's great.
So that's your prediction, huh -- Yankees in 6?
-Or the Braves. You never know, Norm.
[ Laughter ]
♪♪
-Well, as I just said,
the 1996 World Series will begin tomorrow.
Joining us tonight on "Weekend Update"
with his analysis of each team
is a baseball legend and a dear, dear friend of mine.
Please welcome Hall of Fame broadcaster Harry Caray.
Hi, Harry. [ Cheers and applause ]
-Hi, Norm.
Hi. Hi, everybody!
Harry Caray here!
I got to tell you folks --
it's gonna be one heck of a series.
These are two fantastic ball clubs
with outstanding pitching.
You've got Andy Pettitte and David Cone for the Yankees
and, of course, the Braves have
24-game-winner John Smoltz and Tommy Glavine.
He's always tough, Norm.
These teams are so evenly matched.
Let's start with the Yankees.
They play in New York City.
Wow! What a town!
This -- This place is crazy! [ Cheers and applause ]
And you people are nuts!
I once saw an Armenian woman give birth to a baby
in a subway --
beautiful, beautiful 8-pound, 3-ounce boy
named Tanzu.
He's -- He's now 11.
We still keep in touch.
-Oh, okay, okay, well,
Harry, what can you tell us about Atlanta?
-Oh, Atlanta's a beautiful city.
Many consider it the jewel of the South.
You know, it's in Georgia.
[ Laughter ]
-Yeah, that's true, Harry,
but, hey, let's go back to the Braves and Yankees, buddy.
-Norm, actually, I'd like to give a quick shout-out
to Gail and Ron Anderson.
They run Anderson Hardware out in Waukegan, Illinois.
They're actually here on vacation.
They wanted me to say hi
to their beautiful daughter Colleen,
who's watching the store.
Hey, Colleen! -Okay.
Harry, listen, buddy,
let's talk about the lineups for both teams, huh?
-Hey, Norm,
what about those hot dogs they serve at Yankee Stadium?
Aren't they delicious?
-Yeah, sure, yeah.
-I love 'em so much, I once ordered 12.
[ Laughter ]
-12 hot dogs?
-Yeah, I only ate two.
I don't know what I was thinking.
[ Laughter ]
To this day, I still laugh at the idea
that I thought I could eat 12 hot dogs.
You can't do it, Norm. You can't.
-No, no. I, uh, I imagine not.
Well, Harry, I know you have to run,
but, before you leave, hey,
let's get your prediction on who will win the Series.
-Yankees in 6!
-Wow. How about that?
[ Cheers and applause ]
That's great. That's great.
So that's your prediction, huh -- Yankees in 6?
-Or the Braves. You never know, Norm.
[ Laughter and applause ]
That's what makes baseball such a crazy game.
-Okay. Harry Caray, everybody.
Harry Caray. [ Cheers and applause ]
Thanks for joining us, Harry. -Thank you.
-Yeah, nice to have you with us.
-And now with a look back at 1997
is our good friend, Hall of Fame broadcaster Harry Caray.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Hi, everybody. Harry Caray here!
Well, as you know, 1997 was quite a year.
A lot of things happened -- some good, some bad.
Mother Teresa died.
That wasn't good...
unless you hated Mother Teresa.
I myself was not a fan of hers.
Don't ask why.
We were just like oil and water --
we didn't mix.
In the world of sports, Mike Tyson bit a man's ear off.
I don't know what all the hoopla was about.
I've actually bit a man's ear off on several occasions.
And I'm not proud of it, but it helped me out of many a jam.
[ Laughter ]
In Scotland, they cloned a sheep,
which a lot of people thought was fun.
Hey, what if -- Hey!
[ Laughter ]
Hey!
If I was a scientist, you know what I would clone?
Hot dogs!
-Really?
-Think of all the possibilities, Norm!
Imagine -- a world with...
[ Laughter ]
Hey, what's going on?
[ Cheers and applause ]
Imagine...
Hold on!
Imagine a world of -- of -- with an endless supply of hot dogs!
You could have a hot dog any time you wanted!
-Well, Harry, you can do that pretty much now.
-They'd be so abundant, they'd become our currency --
20 hot dogs would equal roughly a nickel,
depending on the strength of the yen --
I'm not quite sure, but...
You know what? I'm getting ahead of myself.
Let's just keep praying that we can clone one of these hot dogs.
-[ Sighs ] Alright, Harry. What else happened in '97?
-Hey, Norm!
Did you gain weight?
-[ Laughs ]
Actually, Harry, I'm Colin.
-Hey!
If you were a hot dog...
and you were starving, would you eat yourself?
[ Laughter ]
-What?
-I know I would.
First, I'd smother myself with brown mustard and relish.
I'd be so delicious.
So, would you?
-I don't know.
-Don't jerk me around, Norm!
It's a simple question!
A baby could answer it.
If you were a hot dog and you were starving,
would you eat yourself?
[ Cheers and applause ]
-I guess so.
-Oh, you made a wise choice, my friend.
If you had said no,
I would have bitten your ear off.
[ Laughter and applause ]
I would have come at you like a tornado
made of arms and teeth and -- and fingernails.
[ Laughter ]
-So, anything else happen in 1997?
-No, I covered everything.
-Harry Caray, everybody.
-Cubs win! Cubs win! [ Cheers and applause ]
-Last week, Major League Baseball was rocked
by yet another steroid scandal,
as Manny Ramirez was suspended for 50 games
for taking a banned substance.
Here now to discuss the issue of steroids in baseball,
the ghost of Harry Carey.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Hi!
Hi, everybody!
Hey!
Hey, guys! -Hey.
-Hey, gang.
Harry Carey here... from the afterlife!
And I gotta tell you folks -- being dead is fantastic!
It's the best thing that ever happened to me.
It's like Heaven.
[ Laughter ]
-It -- It's like Heaven or it is Heaven?
-Let's not get caught up in a semantics argument, Seth.
[ Laughter ]
The fact is, it's great.
-Well, I'm -- that's good. I'm glad to hear it.
-Hey!
You know what they use for currency in Heaven?
Angel bucks.
You always have 100 angel bucks in you wallet.
And even after you pay for something,
you still have 100 angel bucks.
I don't even know what the point is.
I guess they -- they figured that, even in Heaven,
people like having wallets.
[ Laughter ]
-So, how do you feel
about the whole Manny Ramirez situation, Harry?
-Hey, Seth, don't you think
Manny Ramirez looks like the monster from "Predator"?
[ Laughter ]
-Yeah, I-I guess his hair sort of does make -- yeah.
-I mean, based on his size and strength,
I-I bet the "Predator" monster
would make a pretty good ball player.
-Okay.
-I mean, the fear would be
that he would kill all the other players.
I mean, I guess you can ask him not to,
but I think he'd probably just tell you
what you wanted to hear.
[ Laughter ]
Do you think you could trust him, Seth?
-What?
-Hey, don't jerk me around, Seth!
It's a simple yes-or-no question.
If the "Predator" monster promised
he wouldn't kill the other players,
would you put him in the game?
-No?
-Good call, Seth.
[ Laughter ]
I mean, I think, eventually,
his hunter instincts would be too hard to resist.
[ Laughter ] -Okay.
Do you feel like the continuing steroid scandals
are tarnishing baseball?
-I've been talking about this very question a lot
with my roommate in Heaven, baseball great Pete Rose.
[ Laughter ]
-Pete Rose isn't dead.
-You're kidding. -I am not.
[ Laughter ]
-That really burns me. I just --
I just paid that guy 100 angel bucks for --
for some memorabilia.
[ Laughter ]
He duped me...
although, now that I think about it,
there were some signs that he might not have been
who he said he was.
-What signs?
-Well, he -- he didn't seem to know much about baseball,
and he was Asian.
[ Laughter ]
Come to think of it,
he might never have even told me he was Pete Rose --
I just -- I just assumed it.
[ Laughter ]
Hey!
[ Laughter ]
-Do you have any-- Do you have anything else to add?
-Just this --
waterboarding is torture, Seth.
-Whoo!
-It's like the one thing that everyone in Heaven agrees on.
-Well, that came out of nowhere.
-Not really.
It popped into my head
because I'm gonna waterboard Asian Pete Rose
when I get back to my room.
[ Laughter and applause ]
I mean, Heaven or no Heaven,
I don't like getting duped, Seth.
-Harry Carey, everyone!
[ Cheers and applause ] -Cubs win! Cubs win!
Thanks, Seth!
♪♪