Well, hello there. And welcome to this episode of the Terri Cole show.
This is going to be a very personal episode of the show, and I don't think I've shared this
story itself publicly, but it's something that is near and dear to my heart. And it's about
my journey with skin cancer and it is a cautionary tale. So if you're someone who knows you should be
using SPF on your skin when you go in the sun, but you still don't, this is for you, my friend, cuz
I don't want you to experience what I experienced. So in this episode I'll be sharing my journey with
skin cancer and things that you can do, resources, ways that you can become more educated about how
to protect yourself from having skin cancer. So, hey, if you happen to be new to my channel,
welcome, please introduce yourself in the comments cuz we are a friendly group.
Make sure that you also hit the bell. Make sure that you subscribe because I roll out new stuff
every Tuesday and Thursday and I wouldn't want you to miss a thing. If you are new, my name is
Terri Cole, I'm a licensed psychotherapist and relationship expert and the author of Boundary
Boss, which you can get at boundarybossbook.com. And I love to shine a light on your comments
because we are such an active group here on YouTube. So today I am featuring a comment
from Kelly, and this is under the episode called Is Forgiveness Overrated? Do This Instead.
And Kelly says, "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for your amazing teachings. You've changed
my life." Well, Kelly, you are the reason, and all of you are the reason, I do what I do. So
that really warms my heart. And I appreciate you saying so. So now let's move into today's content.
I, in probably 2011 or 2012, I noticed that my a, a patch of skin on my nose was behaving weird.
So when I would dry my face, I had a tendency to dry my face too hard on a towel, but then I
noticed that it would bleed a little bit and I thought, oh, maybe I scratched it. Maybe I did
something. I didn't - I was not concerned in the beginning. And after a while, where probably I'd
say a number of months, this was happening - it wouldn't happen every time, but it was happening
frequently enough that I was like, oh, it's kind of weird. I went to a skin doctor in New
York City and immediately the guy said, that's nothing. That there's, there's nothing. That's
very common. There's nothing. I said, okay. So looked at the other things and there was
nothing. Okay. So went on with my life and then about - it kept happening and I kept noticing it.
And I went to another doctor about a year and a half after that, and the same thing. And I'm not
being all like gender weird, but both of those doctors were men. And I have to say, my concerns
were not necessarily - you know, they were kind of like, it's fine little lady, a little bit. That
was my feeling. But at the time here's the thing. You don't want there to be something wrong with
you, right? You don't want there to be a problem. I'd already been through other kinds of cancer
in my life. Like I just wanted to feel like I was doing my due diligence by going. So then another,
maybe only nine months goes by this time. And now it's happening more frequently where I'm drying
my face and it's bleeding a little bit. So then the thing would heal. And again, it wasn't huge.
It wasn't oozing anything. It wasn't being completely, totally weird where you'd be like,
oh my God, there's something wrong, but it was just not normal. And I finally chose a female
dermatologist in New York City. And I went in to see her and I showed her and I said,
I'm really concerned about this. I think it needs to be biopsied. And she was like, I
completely agree. Let's do it. And immediately it comes back and it is, was a basal cell carcinoma.
So now this means that it is the most common kind of skin cancer. And it's very rare that this kind
of skin cancer moves to other parts of the body - of course it's possible. So now I need to have
a procedure. So the procedure is a Mohs procedure is what they call it. And this means that you're
what I needed to do was set this up. I went to a, a hospital in the city where
they're going to, you're gonna be wide awake. They're gonna numb you locally, they call it,
where they're just doing it with needles, right? So they're numbing you with like a
type of a novacane that goes into your skin. And they're going to take a chunk of your,
this chunk where they see the, the skin was acting weird, off your face and bring it to the
lab right then and there. So they go through this process, and what they're doing is they wanna see
if they got the margins. Did they take enough of the cancerous skin off
for you to be safe basically. So with Mohs procedure, you go into a waiting room. They,
they put a bandage on the wound that they have created. And you go into a waiting
room because it has to go to the lab to see. So I was fortunate that the margins were big
enough, so I didn't have to go back in and go under the knife a second time,
but but so then they just closed me up. You know, you, you do have to go back in now,
they're going to suture actually stitch up the incision where they took the skin cancer away.
And that takes a minute and you know, there's more novacane, and... Here's the thing, listen,
none of this was like super horribly traumatic, but you know, it's a whole thing that you have
to do. And if I didn't have health insurance, it would've been extremely expensive to do. Right?
So then I heal from that takes X number of months where - and I did share a little
bit of this at the time on social media. But what I didn't do is I didn't have the
incision closed by a plastic surgeon, which is what I should have done. And part of it is
that I felt very overwhelmed. My father had also had skin cancer and it didn't move to anywhere
else in his body, but he had multiple surgeries to remove this. And because I still had that,
you know, fear of cancer because I was diagnosed with cancer years earlier, but it was thyroid
cancer, two different kinds. I had a really not great experience with cancer in my younger life.
I think there was a part of me that I just wanted it off of my body. In hindsight, I would have
had it closed by a plastic surgeon because then what ended up happening is,
four years after the fact, it was becoming obvious that the scar was not closed by a plastic surgeon
and it was becoming more and more visible and it was sort of spreading.
It was a weird thing where I could cover it with makeup, but it was, there was an indentation
that I thought did not look great. So I went to a plastic surgeon.
Now that means they have to reopen the scar, right? They're literally cutting your face
open so they can suture the skin together in a way that is much more visibly pleasing. So
I did that. So it was a long drawn out experience that I could have lived without. Now,
I thought I had decent sun care habits, but really when I really thought about it,
I think I thought they were better than they actually were. After this experience though,
they became very good. So I have all of the SPF stuff. So let's talk a little bit about when to
be concerned. And again, let's for clarity's sake and I'll write this everywhere on this blog and
this podcast, PS, I'm not a dermatologist, right? I'm also not an MD. I'm sharing with you from the
patient experience what happened for me in hopes that I can inspire you to take good care of your
skin and to be safe and to take it seriously because I don't think I did take it seriously
until something really happened to me, even though I, I was a cancer survivor by that point.
I would use SPF, but not, not diligently the way that I needed to. So again, I'm not giving you any
medical advice. I'm giving you safety advice that has been to me and that I've been doing
over the past X number of years since this happened. So that's just for clarification for
all of us as to where we are. The kind of cancer basal cell carcinoma, as I said that I had was,
and is one of the most common skin cancers that is diagnosed.
And it happens to be a slow growing skin cancer that rarely moves, right? This is what they say
at the Mayo clinic. It rarely moves to another part of the body. But there are other ones. So
Squamish cell carcinoma, melanoma, and Merkel cell carcinoma, all of those are more serious and more
scary. But here's the thing. The most important thing that you can do is, is early detection.
That's the most important thing. And that starts with self-examination. So you need to really
look at your skin, all of your skin, all between your toes, everywhere - between your butt cheeks,
really have someone else look there, cuz I don't know that you could do that, but
every part - you could get skin cancer anywhere. It isn't just the parts
of your body that are exposed to the sun. Don't, you know, think that the bottom of your feet
don't matter because they're not in the sun. They do. Get really clear. I mean the statistics
say that one in five Americans will develop some form of skin cancer during their lifetime.
So you wanna get to know every square inch of your own body, be familiar with your moles, freckles,
birthmarks, right? Check your skin monthly. This is what is recommended by dermatologists. And
you're so much more likely to be aware if anything changes in your skin. So you need to keep a record
of your findings, right? So it's like, you can create what they call a body map. And I'll create,
I'll put all of this - you guys, don't worry - and other resources in the guide, terricole.com/guide.
So it's really, you're, you're just making a basic diagram of your body and where your moles are,
where, where are there birthmarks? Where are there things? And you're gonna be looking like,
how, where are the margins of those things? You really wanna look at what they look like,
approximate size, if you have a lot of them, the, the color and the date. You're gonna use that map,
which I'll give you the instructions in the guide, every month, and that you're gonna log
your findings, basically recording what is going on. This is the easiest and the most effective way
to identify new spots or changes in existing marks that you have on your skin. And really with each
self exam, you will become more and more familiar with like, what is normal, right? So anything
unusual will really quickly you'll be like, oh, I definitely don't think that was there. And
then you can have that checked out by a doctor. Listen, you have to know your skin, right? And
if you're prone to freckles or moles, it's harder to determine. And I have a lot of, you could have
sun spots, you could have moles and freckles. And I have all of them. Even with, I, I mean,
I use a very high SPF pretty much all the time. I mean, hands are very important, especially if
you drive right? One of my sisters lives in North Carolina and you know, even though she's putting
SPF on her face and her chest area, she ended up having a suspicious thing removed from her arm
because she drives all the time with her arm out the window. So I have driving gloves. I have SPF
shirts that I wear all the time. The hats that I wear when I walk are all SPF. Now I'm also
vain, right? There's a part of me. So I don't want, I don't like the way, if you look at,
if you're watching this on YouTube, you can see right when I put my SPF on my face and my chest
and my arms, for sure, no matter what time of year it is, make sure that you are treating your hands
the same exact way that you are treating your face. Take as good care of your hands in respect
to exposure, because they're the things that are exposed so much. And I will give you a list
of products that, like, the driving gloves that I have that are very inexpensive,
that I think I just got on Amazon, that I like, and the clothing that I wear, that I like, but
this is stuff that you can really get pretty much anywhere. But I did a lot of extensive
research and my sister helped me to figure out what people say are the most effective. What
are the best ones? Make sure you're not looking at an ad on Google because they'll tell
you they're the best ones, but I always look and see, what are the reviews and what do people say?
And I like consumer reports as well to get my information about what is most effective. So what
we're looking for, and this is, this is something that I learned years ago, it's commonly referred
to as the, A, B, C, D E Rule of checking your skin. You're checking for A is for asymmetrical,
asymmetry. So if half a mole or a birthmark doesn't match the other half, that's something
to be aware of. B is for Border. You're looking for irregular jagged, blurry, or notched edges
around something that you're seeing on your skin. C is for Color. If there's non uniform color
in a mark, that includes different shades of black, brown, red, white, pink, or blue
patches. It could be any one of those colors, but we're looking for non uniformity is an
indication that something should be checked. D is for Diameter. If the growth is more than a
quarter of an inch in diameter, about the size of a pencil eraser, they say that should be checked.
And E is for Evolving. The mole is growing or changing in color or shape or acting weird.
Like mine was, right? There was something, my skin was acting weird. I was drying my face
and then not every time, but sometimes it would bleed. And in the beginning I thought it was me.
I'm just drying my face too hard. No, there was something weird about that skin, which was skin
cancer, you know, which we don't want. So listen, that that is not a hard and fast medical, like
this is the only thing that will tell you if you have something to be worried about, but it is an
easy rule. I'll include it in the guide, the A, B C, D E Rule of checking your skin for skin cancer.
Part of what you wanna look about, what are, what are ways that you can take care of yourself?
You wanna make sure that you are staying in the shade. And if you're still sunbathing,
please don't. Like, just, that just has to be so 1989, it's it's over for that. You know,
you can love the sun. It's safe to stay in the sun for a certain period of time of day.
It's good for your vitamin D production. We all know that, right? But you really,
this, at this point, the sun is so strong and it depends on where you live, how strong it is,
but staying in the shade is a good idea. Wearing clothing that covers your arms and legs.
I say, wear SPF clothing, because why not? Wear a hat with a wide brim. I actually have. I mean,
listen, you know that you're not 25 anymore when your clothing is all about protecting you,
right? I actually wear this white visor. And you guys, if you follow me on Instagram,
I literally don't care. I look like someone's auntie. I don't even know.
It's not cool. It's not fashionable in any way, shape or form. And I literally do not give a crap.
This is how you know like you're, you're just so past it because really what I really don't want is
skin cancer - more, more than I care about the way that I look. I'm always wearing hats in the sun,
but this happens to be one of the - it's actually like a just the brim of a hat. That is
so somebody's grandma in Atlantic city, walking on the boardwalk right there. I do not care.
Wear sunglasses that wrap around if you can, that all that block, both the UVA and the UVB
rays. Check into that. I also back in the day met, this is now 20 years ago, probably.
I had this odd growth in my eye. It happens a lot with people with lighter blue eyes,
maybe other people too, but my, the eye doctor said, hey, this is more common. And he is like,
that is from sun exposure. Cause I used to never like to wear sunglasses. And it was something that
you could get removed. And he said, listen, we're not gonna remove it. Cuz it was close
to the, the the Iris right, the color of my eye, but it was noticeable. And it was like a yellow
bump in my eye. It was kind of gross. And then the eye doctors said, Hey, wear polarized sunglasses.
Do not be in the sun without wearing sunglasses that are protecting you from all the kinds of rays
and actually it on its own went away. So I wear good sunglasses. I bought these sunglasses 15
years ago and I have not lost them, which is a miracle. Just Ray-Bans, but they're polarized,
and they protect from all the rays. That's just another side note of how the sun can damage your
eyeballs, not just your skin. Okay. Moving down to using SPF. So use a broad spectrum, sunscreen
and a sun protection factor. So doctors say SPF of 15 or higher. Again, keep in mind you guys,
I'm not a doctor. I just don't want you getting skin cancer. So I'm sharing my experience in hopes
that those of you seeing this, you know, watching this on YouTube or those of you listening to it,
that you will take it very seriously. If you have anything that looks weird on your skin,
please go see a doctor. This can be scary things. You know, melanoma itself can be very
dangerous. I, I heard of someone 38 years old, only six months ago, who let something go on their
arm and they, it moved and they died from cancer. It's scary. So I'm not trying to be shocking to
you. This is not shocking because if you watch the news at all, you know that it's true,
but it's easy to either be dissuaded the way that I was by doctors who say
nothing's wrong. If your gut instinct says something is wrong, you must go with that.
So really look, if you have any part of your body, your skin that is acting weird or anything that is
bigger than a quarter of an inch or any of those things that I said,
please go get yourself checked out. And in the meantime, young people, hey, you know,
what's, you're not gonna be? Young forever. And take care of your skin now, if you want
your skin to look good later, if there's a vanity thing in there. But I also just want you to live
and be healthy and not deal with, you know, that Mohs procedure, having the surgery twice.
This is not the end of the world. People have gone through way worse, but it
wasn't fun. And I certainly wouldn't want you to have that experience. So I hope this little PSA
on skincare and you know, the signs and symptoms of weird skin and skin cancer, was helpful to you.
If it was, please share it with other people in your life who you think could use it. I created
a nice guide for you. So you'll have all of the recommendations from actual skin doctors
who are not me, and that you can get that at terricole.com/guide. I hope this was helpful you
guys. So I hope you have an amazing week taking care of your skin and as always take care of you.