Your leader is sitting inherently in that highest value.
And if you look carefully in your life, it's been there the whole time,
it's been going on and evolving. It may evolve a bit,
but there's a path it's taking you on.
This particular topic today is going to be about finding your purpose in life.
Now,
many teachers and philosophers through the ages have discussed the idea
of teleology, the study of meaning and purpose,
and although many scientists and philosophers and thinkers have not believed
that there is in any inherent meaning specifically in the universe,
each individual can extract outta their existence,
a feeling of meaning and purpose for themselves.
So there may not be a universal value and universal meaning for people or
purpose for people, but there certainly is one for each individual.
Now what's interesting is our purpose is whatever we value most in life.
Now you probably heard me mention how important values are in almost every
aspect of human behavior, but every human being lives by a set of priorities,
a set of values, things that are most important to least important.
And whatever's highest on that Individual's values,
the very highest thing that's most important, most meaningful, most inspiring,
most fulfilling to them, whatever that is,
their identity revolves around it.
So their ontological identity revolves around that, and who they are is that.
So if their highest value is raising a beautiful children,
they'll call themselves a mother. If their highest value is running businesses,
they may call themselves an entrepreneur.
If their highest value is being in sports and swimming or whatever,
they may call themselves a swimmer. In my case, my highest value is teaching,
I call myself a teacher. But whatever's highest on one's values,
list of values, is what is most important,
most meaningful, most fulfilling, most inspiring,
the thing that they are spontaneously inspired from within,
intrinsically to do, this is the path of purpose.
And each of you have a different set of priorities, a different set of values.
If you've gone on my website,
dr.demartin.com and done the Value Determination process,
and you've done it once or more times,
you'll see that there's a pattern that's showing up about what your life
demonstrates most important to you.
Whatever's highest on that list is the path of purpose.
And this is the thing that you can't wait to get up in the morning and do.
Again, mine is teaching. But each individual is something unique.
I'm not gonna say what it is. There's no right and wrong to it.
And everybody's unique and it's like a fingerprint for them, but whatever it is,
they've gotta give themselves permission to do that. Because if they don't,
they're going to have less fulfillment in life. Living by duty,
deontologically by other people's expectations and values is not gonna be as
fulfilling as living by what is most important to you. You know,
the majority of people are clouded in the clarity of what it is that they feel
is their mission and purpose in life,
because they're comparing themselves to others,
putting many of 'em up on pedestals, injecting those values into your life.
Cuz values go from those who have the most power to least power.
And whenever you're too humble to admit what you see in them is inside you,
you give away your power and put them on pedestals.
And then you inject all these people's values into your life,
which clouds the clarity of your own highest values,
which is your purpose in life.
So I learned about purpose and been focusing on purpose since I was 17,
I knew I wanted to be a teacher. And your life demonstrates your values.
So look carefully. You don't have to look anywhere else, but look at your life,
look at how you fill your space and how you spend your time and what energizes
you and what is it you spend your money on and where are you most organized and
where are you most disciplined? And what do you think about, visualize,
and internal dialogue with yourself about most about how you want your life,
that shows evidence of coming true.
And what do you want to converse with other people about in social settings?
And what is it that inspires you and what's common to the people who inspire
you? And what is it that's really the consistent goals and persistent goals that
you've got that you're making come true?
And look at what you can't wait to learn,
you kind of wanna study and go online and watch YouTubes or videos about.
If you look, there's a pattern there and there's something you can't miss.
And I have people all the time say, well, I don't know what my purpose is,
and because they're comparing themselves to other people and actually thinking,
well, it ought me this. And whenever you hear yourself saying, I really,
I gotta do this, I have to do this, I must do this, I need to do this,
I should do this, I ought to do this, supposed to do this,
you can almost guarantee that there's somebody outside there that you've given
power to that's injecting their values and clouding the clarity of your own.
Cause when doing something you really love, you love it.
Something you're inspired to do.
So if you're not taking the time to really just sift through the 'should's' and
'ought to's' and get into what you really love doing that is where you're going
to have the most potential, that is where you're going to excel.
And that is also the area, because you love doing it,
you're willing to embrace pain and pleasure in the pursuit of it.
You're willing to go after challenges and wake up genius.
You're there to go and wake up your natural born leader,
cuz your leader is sitting inherently in that highest value.
And if you look carefully in your life, it's been there the whole time.
It's been going on and evolving. It may evolve a bit,
but there's a path that's taking on.
And if you look at the people that you've admired and been inspired by,
there's a pattern to it. That's similar to it.
There's something in them that inspired.
I've been inspired by great teachers and great philosophers and Nobel prize
winners and people that do great educational experiences.
I'm inspired by them because they represent what's inspiring to.
And if you look at the jobs you've had,
there's a common thread to something you learned out of each of those jobs that
means something to you or you wouldn't have stayed with that job.
And so there's a common thread to it. And if you look at it,
it's pointing you in a direction.
And if you look at when you're most inspired and feel like you're engaged and
you don't want to get a distraction and you don't wanna take a break,
that's when you're engaged, look carefully at what that is.
That's what's highest on your value. That's what your purpose.
Your purpose is really the most efficient and effective pathway in
life to fulfill the greatest amount of voids,
things that are empty or missing or not complete in your life, and fulfill them.
Fulfillment means filling full the mind. And so when you go and you do,
what's really, really highest on your value,
that's when you have the most fulfillment in life. So go online,
do the Demartini Value Determination process. Take the time to go through it.
Do it again and again, if necessary, be honest with yourself on the answers,
it's 13 questions, like I just mentioned,
that can help you clarify what that is.
Look at the common threads on what all your careers have been.
What's the pattern in them? Look at all the people that have inspired you.
What's the pattern in them?
Look at the moment when you're most inspired and engaged and you lose track of
time, what's the common denominator?
And then look at the thing that you've looked at,
you've made the biggest difference in people's lives. If you look carefully,
the things that make the biggest difference will either bring a tear of
gratitude to you, when you're doing what's highest on your value, that's a sign.
Cuz when you're doing what's highest on your value,
you have a tendency to want be in fair exchange with people,
you want to go and help people solve problems. You love problem solving.
You know, it's just like a boy who loves his video games.
When he goes and completes a game,
he wants to go to a more advanced game and tackle a bigger challenge.
When you're living according to your highest values,
you love tackling challenges and those challenges are not just yours,
but you love helping other people solve theirs.
And when we go out and do things that solve other people's problems and do it
with sustainable fair exchange and have remuneration for it,
now you get to do what you love and love what you do and get paid for it.
And this is the path of a mastered life, and I'm absolutely certain you can,
I've helped people all over the world,
help them go and do what they really love to do and get handsomely paid to do
it, and do something that's meaningful and purposeful in their life. You know,
we extract meaning,
in our highest value when we live by our highest value and live congruently and
prioritize our life and delegate lower priority things, we are most resilient,
most adaptable, most objective,
most engaged and most solving a problem oriented,
we wanna problem solve, and we love to wake up our genius.
We literally wake up our genius, expand our space and time horizons,
go out and do something more extraordinary. We live a more leaderful life,
leadership life.
So make sure you go through and do the Value Determination and then start
structuring your life on whatever was highest on the value,
the thing that you spontaneously love doing,
the thing that you feel your identity revolves around,
the thing you feel love that you love doing,
that's not a 'should' or 'ought to'.
Then start structuring your life and ask what is the highest priority action I
can do today to help me fulfill that?
And how can I go and do that in a way that serves ever greater numbers of
people?
Cause if you can do that and get paid for it and do something that serves,
you liberate yourself from where most people are, which is Monday morning blues,
Wednesday hump days, thank God it's Friday's,
week freaking ends and they've got a schizophrenic life where their vocation and
vacation are separate. If you're not doing something you love every day,
you're draining yourself. And you're basically saying, I just want break.
I just want to escape. I want vacation. I wanna get out. I wanna retire.
I wanna get away from what I don't love doing.
And that's not the way to live your life.
So go and take the time to do the Value Determination process on my website.
Go and do that again and again, if necessary until you're certain,
until you get tears in your eyes,
and then start structuring your life accordingly.
I had a lady one time in London, we were doing the Breakthrough Experience,
my signature program, the Breakthrough Experience. And she speaks up on Sunday,
which is a two day program of the weekend. She speaks up. She says, Dr.
Demartini, I don't know what my purpose is. And I said, okay.
So I walked right up to her and I said, okay,
what do you do every single day that you spontaneously do,
that nobody has to remind you to do, that you love doing? It inspires you.
I don't know, she said, I said, no, no, no, no. Answer my question.
Be accountable, quit running this story.
Quit comparing yourself to others for a moment. Just answer the question.
What do you do every single day that nobody has to remind you to do that
inspires you? I spend time with my children. Great.
And do you fill your space with that, are your children around you? Yes.
Do you spend a lot of time with your children most throughout the da?. Great.
And does that energize you when you interact with the kids and watching 'em
grow? Absolutely.
And does your money go mainly to your children and raising beautiful children?
Yes. And is that what you are most organized in,
having organization on how to manage those kids? Yep. Good.
And is it where you're most disciplined? You're reliable,
you're always there to make sure that you're basically there for the kids? Yep.
And is that what you think about, visualize, and talk about most of the time?
Yeah. And what do you converse with your friends about when you talk to 'em,
you talk about your kids? Yep. And is that what you have as a long term goal?
She started getting watery eyed. She says, that's been my long term goal.
I've been wanting to raise amazing family. And I said,
and is that what you study about, read about,
learn about and kids and managing kids? Says, yeah,
I spend most of my time on that. I said,
what do you mean you don't know what your purpose in life is? She said, well,
is that good enough? I said, well, who are you comparing yourself to?
I guess I'm comparing myself to this other woman that's got a business,
she's got two kids and got a business. I've got three kids,
but she's got two kids and she's running a business.
And I thought I should be doing that. I gotta be doing that.
And then I can't seem to stay focused on a business. I said,
because it's not really your heart.
You're sitting there subordinating yourself to this lady and being this lady,
trying to imitate this lady, you're trying to be somebody you're not.
You're hearing yourself saying these 'should's' and 'ought to's',
and that's not really where your heart is. And she said,
but is that good enough? And I said, well, you know,
Rose Kennedy from the Kennedy family, she says, her mission statement is;
I dedicate my life to raising a family of world leaders. And she said, well,
that's all I've ever wanted to do. Raise beautiful children. And I said, well,
then give yourself permission to do it. That's your mission.
And she cried and she gave me a hug. And she said,
that's all I've ever wanted to do. And I said, well,
then quit comparing yourself to other people,
give yourself permission to be you.
Because she was sitting there and her life was pointing her in that direction.
Everything was going in that direction.
My Value Determination was pointing directly at it.
When she finally gave herself permission to do that, she got tears of gratitude.
And stopped the idea that 'I need to be somebody else.' Albert Einstein said
something really powerful. He said,
if you're a cat and you're expecting to swim like a fish,
you're gonna beat yourself up. You're not gonna appreciate yourself.
Or if you're a fish trying to expect to climb a tree like a cat,
you're gonna beat yourself up.
But if you finally honor who you are and look at what your life and values are
pointing to, that's why the Value Determination process is so important.
That's why Breakthrough, my seminar that I do is so important,
to help break through the facades of who we are supposed to be and get on with
who we are.
Because sometimes if we sit there and let everybody else's life interfere with
ours, we're not gonna be clear about our own mission.
Our mission is unique to us. It's not something that somebody else is doing.
It's what we're to do. I learned a long time ago that I'm a teacher.
I don't try to compare myself to other people.
I find that's just futile and fruitless.
Anytime you try to live in other people's values, you have futility.
Anytime you try to get other people live in your values, you have futility.
So don't look people down and look down on 'em and out 'em in the pit,
and don't put 'em up on pedestals, put 'em in your heart,
so you can communicate what you do in terms of what their values are.
And that way you can do something that's meaningful with fair exchange and get
paid to do what you love doing. Now, this lady's situation,
she'd sometimes have kids, I asked her,
do you ever have kids around from friends, from the kids' friends? Yeah.
Sometimes' five kids over, six kids over. I said,
have you thought about putting together some sort of a deal where you're taking
care of kids? And she got really teary eyed. She goes, that's what I love doing.
I love taking care of a bunch of kids. I said,
you thought about having some sort of kid arrangement where you're having kids
over and you're babysitting or taking care of 'em or doing training for 'em.
Do you train your kids? She goes, I do some training. I said,
do you have any desire it or train other kids or inspire kids or have kids over?
And she goes, well, yeah, that could be really cool. She started thinking,
I don't know what happened with it, but she started thinking, well,
maybe I could actually have it where a safe place for kids to go after school,
that they can come and play and do that and be supervised.
Cuz I think there's a lot of women that would like to have,
and men that would like to have their kids supervised and make sure that they're
safe during the afternoon until they get home from work.
So this is something that's not a daycare center,
but it's something that's something similar to it and she could get paid to do
that.
But I'm a firm believer that you want to do what you really love to do in life
and quit comparing yourself to other people and look at what's common to the
things that you are inspired by and look at what it is that you admire,
the people you admire.
And not the people you put on pedestals that you're trying to be somebody that
you're not, but look at the people that inspire you.
There a difference between looking up and fantasizing about something.
Another one that is actually going, that's what I love doing,
and you're incorporating it.
So those are things you can do to help you find your purpose in life.
And if you're not taking the time to do the Value Determination, please do that.
If you haven't been to the Breakthrough Experience,
come to the Breakthrough Experience,
let me show you how to do the Demartini Method,
to dissolve all the baggage and all the emotional challenges that's
occupying your mind and noise in the brain,
so you can have a clear conscious and be focused, so you can live that mission.
I've been living my mission for 49 years.
And I thought that everybody did that throughout the years.
And I realized that not everybody does that.
A lot of people have accepted kind of a mediocre life and quiet life of
desperation because they haven't given themselves permission to find something
deeply meaningful. As Viktor Frankl says that, you know,
in search of meaning, and this is a very important thing,
this is what allowed him to get through the concentration camps,
and whatever your purpose is, that's the most meaningful,
that's the most inspiring and most fulfilling thing you can do.
It helps you find meaning in your life and you can be grateful for your life.
And when you're living by your purpose, you have more gratitude,
you have more appreciation,
more expansion of awareness and potential and you end up making a difference and
exemplifying what's possible to other people.
So take the time to do the Value Determination process.
Look honestly at what your life is pointing to,
look at the people that you've admired along the way.
Not the people you've subordinated to, but the people you really look and go,
that's the thing. And there's evidence,
long term evidence that you're working towards it. If there's evidence on it,
I believe it. If there's no evidence on it, it's a fantasy, I don't.
Find out what your life demonstrates that you spontaneously do,
that nobody has to remind you to do, that you love doing, that's inspiring,
that makes a difference, it contributes to people's lives,
and let's get on with your purpose. It makes a difference.
And even though there's no universal purpose, there is a purpose for you.
Anyway, this is Dr. Demartini. I look forward to our next presentation,
next message.
And please take time to think about this and put this in operation
because it's your life and you deserve to have a life that's fulfilled.