>> Jason Rivera: I came out
when I was
eighteen-years-old.
I was a freshman in college, I had just lost my mom, and I just knew it was
the right time.
But I, but in coming out I was really subjected to a lot of harassment and bullying.
>> Roberta Buckberg: When I was a teenager I was bullied frequently
because I'm six feet tall,
I look rather masculine, wear my hair short
and dress in what are traditionally male clothes.
So I was frequently was bullied or teased,
and it really hurt me and made me pull in.
>> Kimoni Howard: I had my own personal experiences being bullied.
It was when I was younger,
but it still,
it was
a frightening situation.
>> Jason: I became a target on campus, my room was vandalized, just a lot of ugly
things happened.
>> Dr. Loraine Hutchins: It's a societal problem.
It's not individuals who are bad.
We need to be better about taking care of each other. >> Rita Kranidis: These are
tough years. I mean when you're in your teens, in your late teens early twenties
it's a very tough time
for, it's a tough growing up time, I think. >> Roberta: Every time I watch a video
of some beautiful,
beautiful baby,
or see a news story
of some wonderful, young person
whose contribution we've lost
because some mean,
uneducated, closed minded
people have tormented them,
my heart breaks
because that's
a beautiful, sensitive, kind person
that we've lost.
>> Kimoni: It's just
not okay.
I think, you know,
people need to take more time and just
be more understanding.
>> Roberta: So please hang in.
Not just for you,
but for everybody else.
For all the people who can learn from you,
for all the people who will love you, for all the people who love you now.
Please hold on.
It does get better.
>> Emmanuel Matias: If you
ever feel that
you can't do it alone, you know, just go out, and you know, maybe talk to a friend,
talk to a teacher because, you know, they're there to help you.
>> Jason: And fortunately for me, I went to a very small liberal arts school,
Manhattanville College in New York, and
I was also very active, I was a student leader.
And so I held the institution accountable, and the environment on campus
really began to change.
>> Loraine: When I was,
you know, "little Lorraine" at Montgomery Blair High School,
we didn't have a gay group, there weren't any books I could read,
there weren't any teachers I could look up to who were out.
We've come a long way.
>> Judy Ackerman: I think it's a basic civil right. I think whenever we have a group of
people in society who tell another group that they can't do
things that are rights for everyone else it's wrong, and we need to make sure that
we open up our college and our community to everyone.
>> Dr. DeRionne Pollard: For me, I've always seen it as a power relationship. I never want
somebody to have more power over me
than I have myself.
And the idea of living in the closet,
having other people make decisions about me, make assumptions about me, which is
something I didn't know how to do any more. >> Dr. Deborah Stearns: And it's only really with
the freedom to love,
the freedom to form families as we choose, the freedom to express ourselves
through femininity or masculinity, or neither or both, or other that we are
really free to be ourselves.
And so the gay, lesbian, bisexual transgender, queer questioning
allies movement
is really
our movement.
It's everybody's movement. >> Dr. DeRionne: There is a clarity I think that comes from living
authentically and living truthfully.
>> Michelene Coulbary: You walk around pretty much with the whole world on your shoulders
and it's not,
it's not a great experience at all.
So once you get to the point where you can be honest with yourself and be
honest with everyone around you,
you're really lifting that weight up, and you're lifting that weight off your shoulders.
>> Jason: I think the best advice I got
was when I graduated high school was from the student government advisor,
and she wrote in my yearbook, "to thy own self be true
and always tell the truth,"
right, and
that has been something that has stayed with me for the duration of my lifetime,
right, and
it stayed with me because it really speaks to honoring and loving myself
without apology. >> Zachary Benavidez: I think that I am a much more honest person
with myself and with my friends, and my friends get me
100%.
And part of that is my sexuality. Part of that is
who I'll fall in love with or who I am in love with, or who
I'm dating.
Part of all of that, I mean, why wouldn't I want to be able to share all
parts of myself with my friends and family? So, to not come out would be
denying that in myself, denying an opportunity for them to know me, and denying an
opportunity for me to
share
all of whom I am.
That's what I think is so important to me.
JASON: My coming out and my
working toward creating that
environment really helped other students on campus to come out,
and it was after that I realized that I wasn't alone
and that it would get better, and it did.
>> Loraine: Hang in there.
Reach out.
Believe in yourself,
listen to your inner truth,
and trust that you do know that how you love is alright.
>> Kimoni: If you walk with your head down, pick your head up,
you know.
No one's going to love you like you love yourself.
If you don't love yourself, then how can you love others, and how can you expect for other
people
to respect you or to love you?
So, my advice would be just to love yourself.
And take that negative and
always turn it into something positive.
>> Michelene: Find yourself someone that you can really talk to,
even if it means you're writing in a journal for the next six months until
you find someone you're comfortable talking to
because writing, writing helped me a lot too.
And it was easier to at least be able to get my feelings out so I can look at
them and reevaluate them as I needed to,
and then
having my guidance counselor at school. Counselors are a great person to talk to.
It was just a better experience once I finally started
being true to myself and once I started
getting my feelings out, bottling them up doesn't help anything. >> DeRionne: So, I didn't come out
until I was in college, actually more toward the end of my
collegiate experience.
One of the things that I'm most proud about is that for over twenty years
I have loved and been loved by a phenomenal woman. >> Emmanuel: I've been fortunate enough to
meet someone
even though I have all this stuff to deal with, you know, I do have someone right
there by my side who's willing to stick with me and,
you know, help me through this. >> Rita: You do find acceptance, you do find self-
acceptance, I think, first and foremost, the older you get the easier that
that gets,
and when you're there for yourself
other people can be there for you, so,
grow with it, keep moving forward,
and you will have a supportive circle of people around you.
>> DeRionne: Montgomery College is committed
that every student
has a positive
learning environment in a safe place
and for me,
that means that if I can use my life as an example to help students, if I can craft
conversations that allow this to occur, that's the most important thing that I think
that I can do to help let students know that it gets better.