(computer chirping musically)
(rhythmic music)
- [Vanessa] You wanted to see me?
- Vanessa, yes.
Please, come in.
Take a seat.
(upbeat music)
(laughs)
Ah. (chuckles)
Wow, you have been such a rockstar, Vanessa,
really embodying our core values,
taking a high-level approach
while also drilling down,
really moving the needles of our best practices.
- Well, that is what I'm always striving for.
- Without complaining.
(ominous music)
These things take time.
We all have to pay our dues.
I mean, I have definitely paid mine.
I used to be the only woman in this office,
and now the boys on the 10th floor
wanna do something over a single picture on the internet.
I mean, I'm the reason that we got a lactation room
and I'm child-free.
- Yeah, you made great use of that supply closet.
- Uh, they still won't allow for a baby Fridays, though.
Hmm.
Look at him. Hmm.
(makes wordless noises)
Ooh.
So, PR's working on a statement,
but we need something internal happening.
A racial initiative, if you will.
Don't really know how a racial initiative
works when there are no women on the board,
but we're team players, right?
To onward and upward.
(Vanessa makes glitch sound) - Onward and upward.
- Hmm.
So, I talked to the boys about it,
and I wanna empower you to take on more responsibility.
- Well, I'm always happy to help.
What portion- - The whole thing.
The whole thing.
You know, I would do it.
I really would,
but I'm learning as somebody in a position of power
to pass the torch to somebody who may not be as qualified
but needs the opportunity to shine.
And look, there is opportunity for growth.
That director of associates position
has been open for a while,
and you know how we love to promote from within.
(both laugh)
(Vanessa makes glitch sound) (both laugh)
(Vanessa shrieks)
So, is that something that you would be interested in?
- Yes, Dad, of course I have a 401k
and they're paying for my master's.
(peers cheering)
- I really regret not recognizing your full potential
- Get out.
- I would love that.
- Great.
Good to hear.
Wow, I will work on the details.
This is gonna be so good for you,
and that promotion is gonna be good for us.
- Hmm.
Well, thank you for the opportunity.
- Oh, and Vanessa,
the other one, too.
Just both.
The diversity in me sees the diversity in you.
(hands slapping)
I gotcha.
(Vanessa shrieks)
- Please leave, yeah. - Thank you.
(suspenseful music)
(shrieking)
Oh my God.
Lactation room?
Don't nobody in this office have kids,
the way these benefits is set up.
(shrieks)
Oh, but now, but now I need to plan a whole initiative,
but I'm unqualified,
but I'm in charge of the whole thing.
Make it make sense.
I'm gonna do it though,
but I'm taking the whole week of Juneteenth off.
That's holiday pay, ho.
- [Coworker] Oh, hey, Vanessa.
- Oh, hi.
- [Coworker] All right, I'll see you inside.
(dramatic thudding)
(rhythmic music)
- [Friend] Your boss is ridiculous, but,
I mean, you're trying to move up, right?
- Okay.
The pro, the promotion.
It's finally in my immediate future.
She's the one that brought it up.
That con, though.
You is smart, you is kind, you is important.
It's giving Iyanla, Fix My Racism, and I'm Iyanla.
- [Friend] So, what are you going to do?
- Oh, oh, I'm going to become Director of Associates.
(rhythmic music)
- Oh, Vanessa.
All the details are in the email that I just sent.
Now, we didn't account for this in our Q3 planning,
but we're trying to stay nimble,
so there is a bit of a budget for a temp.
- For a- - For a temp.
- Oh, for official company programming?
- You know who we should get on this?
Josephine.
Oh, yeah, that'll look good.
Give her call.
See what she's up to.
I just really love her energy.
(rhythmic rap music)
Hey.
Ooh, I love Starbucks.
- You look good.
(women laughing)
I love your hair.
(women laughing)
Josephine.
- Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
I'll get right on that.
Do I have anything in my teeth?
I had a gyro for lunch. - No.
You're fine.
- 'Kay.
(laid-back instrumental music)
(chimes ringing)
- Grand rising.
- Hi, is this Josephine?
- Mm, Jolasun.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I think I have the wrong phone number.
- No, I am Jolasun now.
I had a spiritual awakening in Ghana
and was gifted this name.
- Okay.
That's cool.
Well, they got me working on some diversity training
but I thought it would be fun if you came back
and helped me out for a little bit.
Are you around?
- I am stateside, yes,
but I have transitioned to other forms of service,
but I could give three months
before I venture on a new journey.
- Great.
If that's a yes,
then I will send over the paperwork.
You know the drill.
And I will see you this Friday for the kickoff call.
- We are aligned for Friday.
(phone beeps)
(breathes)
(hums)
(electronic glitching)
(rhythmic music)
- So, they're calling this a symposium now.
I know it's not like the fancy retreats
I've seen you posting.
- Yes, I spent some time in Greece.
Symposium, for the Greek word sympinein,
a time of libation and discussion.
- Mm-hmm.
Well, open brainstorm session
with the HR director is scheduled for later today.
Can you take notes?
- Yes.
I am here to bring forth your vision.
- We also need to reach out to venues
and get the ball rolling on that.
So- - We are aligned.
You know, the vibrations in this space
have always been a bit confusing, almost hostile.
I hope that this symposium will bring new balance.
- So, speakers,
is that something you can help out with
or is that too much for your throat chakra?
- I cleared that up in Chiang Mai,
but Vanessa,
the diversity in me sees
the diversity in you.
- All right.
Well, the meeting's almost here.
So, go 'head and take notes on this for me, please.
I have a tab open.
- Okay. - Thanks.
We good?
- Mm, boss bitch.
You think you're better than me?
You think just because you have balls
that you're a boss bitch?
It's not the, ladies!
Josephine.
Hey, girlfriend.
Oh, you changed your look.
- Yes, this aligns more with me now.
- Yeah, come on, freeform,
bra strap-length.
Oh, also, it's Jolasun now.
- That's beautiful.
But if you don't mind,
I think I'm gonna come continue to call you Jo-
- Lasun.
Jolasun.
- Mm.
You know, I went through my own awakening
in the early 2000s.
Wouldn't believe it, but I used to be a wild gal.
A lot of cocaine.
- So, I'm happy to get us started here.
I've done my own research.
- Oh! (claps)
There are no wrong answers, ladies,
but before we jump in,
PR is already set on the verbiage
diversity is vital in designing equity.
- Can I chime in here?
I think that's a mouthful.
Is that flexible in any way?
- Yeah.
That's why we're using the acronym.
(ominous music)
- I really think we should workshop this title.
- Nah, it's not gonna be necessary.
The boys are already set on it,
and marketing is drafting up messaging as we speak.
- Of course,
but with all due respect as the lead on this project, right?
The whole thing?
I think we should really circle back with PR.
- But Vanessa, Vanessa.
Diversity is vital in designing equity.
- No. Yeah.
Of course it is.
I just think- - Great!
So, we're good to move on.
Me too.
(Jolasun makes glitch sound)
Now- - How 'bout we all
just take a breath, right?
As we undulate our arms up and down,
arms up and down.
Yes, undulate.
- Oh my God, that feels good.
- [Jolasun] Yes.
(all exhaling)
Yes.
- Oh, Vanessa, this is the type of energy that we need.
- Yes, let's move into warrior.
How 'bout that?
Let's move into warrior, everyone.
See, yes, beautiful.
And ladies, the diversity in me
sees the diversity in both of you or you.
Warrior II.
- Vanessa.
Look, Vanessa, look.
- [Jolasun] Let's go deeper.
- Oh, I can go deeper.
- [Jolasun] Nice.
- Oh, I can go deep.
I can go really stinkin' deep.
- Love it.
Yes.
- [HR Director] How did you do that to your hair?
- Oh.
- Do you like this?
- [Jolasun] I do. Love it.
- I've been working a lot on my glute, gluteus maxi-men.
(intense electronic music)
(Vanessa screeches)
(upbeat jazz music)
- Hey everyone, it's me, Hallease,
endeavoring to persevere as always.
Thank you so much for watching
the pilot episode of the web series
"This Could Have Been an Email"
featuring myself and Evelyn from the Internets.
It has been a labor of love to bring this pilot to you all.
I am so happy that y'all finally got to see this.
I know I've been talking about it for over a year
and it's finally in front of you.
We would love to bring
the rest of this web series to you.
Again, Evelyn and I wrote five episodes.
You have just watched Episode One,
so if you can, check out the Indiegogo campaign.
Link will be down in the description box,
and join the production
at whatever level you feel comfortable with.
Your contribution to this production
will go towards gear rentals,
location rentals, paying the crew.
I gotta feed folks,
you know what I'm saying?
Evelyn's wig, props and wardrobe.
Yo.
So, yeah, check out the Indiegogo.
And again, whatever you feel comfortable with
contributing to the production,
it is greatly appreciated.
Last time I checked,
we're actually almost at 50% of our goal,
which means for sure we can
at least move into production on Episode Two.
Would love to move into production
on Episode Two and Three at the same time,
but we are endeavoring to persevere,
and if Episode Two is what we hit,
then Episode Two is what we hit.
Amen?
Amen.
Likewise, though, if for whatever reason
you can't join the production at this time,
totally understand.
Do me a solid and share this pilot
with at least five people you think will be interested.
Five solid people.
Like, text 'em directly,
email 'em directly, check out this web series,
you know what I'm saying?
Because the shares, the likes, the comments,
they all add up.
They really do.
We gotta cater.
We gotta pander to the algorithms that be, okay?
So, do me a solid and share it
with as many people as you can, at least five.
Do me solid and gimme five.
In the comments below,
let me know how you like the series,
what you took away,
how you feel about Josephine, Jolasun.
You know what I'm saying?
How you feel about her?
How you feel about Vanessa?
Let me know in the comments below.
I'm so excited to bring these characters to you
and just see how y'all feel about this entire vibe.
You know what I mean?
And, you know,
I hope to bring y'all Episode Two relatively soon,
but we will, we'll just see how it goes,
one step at a time.
Again, I'm Hallease, endeavoring to persevere as always.
Thank you so, so much for watching this pilot episode
of "This Could Have Been an Email,"
the five-part comedy web series, and yeah.
I'll see you when I see you.
(upbeat jazz music)